Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Good, The Bad, The WTF

You know, for those of us who are American soccer fans, it's a pretty big day. A home match against rivals Mexico, and it's a World Cup Qualifier. What better time to take a look at a horror shirt from Mexico's past? Well, as you'll see, The Day of the Dead may have sufficed, but that's not until November.

There are times when playing up your country's heritage goes a bit too far. The rough equivalent of this shirt in the US would be a mural showing the Cherokee on the Trail of Tears with smallpox-laden blankets. Or maybe a Pacific Northwest totem pole. Either way, you'd need to give a sly wink to a culture that got killed off by the conquering forces that have rewritten local history over the past 300 years.

So yeah, the Mayan face isn't the best representation of a modern Mexico. But look at it. Aren't you a little scared? The face has his tongue out like a Maori doing the Haka. That's supposed to instill fear in the enemy. Or maybe this is just the death mask representation of the one of the losers of that Mayan game, kind of like basketball, where the losers reportedly got beheaded. Still, that's scary too. And fitting for Day of the Dead. But it's not Day of the Dead, so I have to stop using that reference. Unless you count Mexico getting slaughtered tonight. Then it can be Una Nueva Dia de los Muertos. I kind of like the sound of that, especially for SGE's career as Mexican coach.

OK, back to the shirt. Yes, it's bad, but it is done better than most. Instead of using a shiny sublimation for the contrast print, two shades of green are used. This does away with the need to view the shirt in the correct light to see what the manufacturer wants you to see. Also, it's a lot better done than the follow up.

Gah. This is simply hideous. The same company (something called ABA Sport) has taken the design and redone it so that it gives everyone a headache. If I had a guess, I would think that the company had hired Jorge Campos as color consultant. The nicest thing that can be said about this shirt is that Mexico is spelled correctly. Horrific stuff.

Now, for the denouement (if you consider the last 'graph to be climax), I'll gie my quick impression on tonight's game. First off, the weather isn't as bad as US Soccer would have hoped for in Columbus in February. The temperature will be in the 50s at kickoff, and there is a chance for rain. Not quite the 20s from the same fixture four years ago. As such, I have had to amend my initial prediction of a 3-0 US win to 2-1. Still, a win's a win, especially if you get the other team to fire their coach after the match.


Nathaniel said...

I think they took this kit and made the time-waster Zuma out of it.

The Fan's Attic said...

This shirt looks like a Roomba went over a can of red paint and then hit up the soccer jersey on the floor. In other words, it looks like a murder scene.