England expects, young man!
It's a little quiet at UF towers today. Everyone is busy with, well, other business. But that's ok, this afternoon we'll have a good old fashioned live thread. You can amuse yourselves. It's the final of the Under 21 European Championships. England v Germany. Woahhhhh. The old enemy! I'll check in from time to time to see how you are doing and to add updates.
After his semi final penalty heroics, Joe Hart is suspended for England. He will likely be replaced by man mountain and Peterborough stopper Joe Lewis. England also have key players missing up top. Gabby Agbonlahor and Frazier Campbell are also suspended. Theo Walcott is expected to play a key role as a central striker.
Problems aside. Manager Stuart Pearce is feeling confident..."The team who has the most guts, takes their chances and maybe has enough fit players will win, we came here to win, now we want to take the trophy home." -Stuart Pearce.
The teams are in..Lets have a look.
Germany U21: Neuer, Beck, Howedes, Boateng, Boenisch, Hummels, Johnson, Castro, Khedira, Ozil, Wagner.
Subs: Fromlowitz, Aogo, Ebert, Marin, Schwaab, Grote, Adlung, Ben-Hatira, Schmelzer, Ede, Sippel.
England U21: Loach, Cranie, Richards, Onuoha, Gibbs, Cattermole, Muamba, Noble, Milner, Walcott, Johnson.
Subs: Lewis, Taylor, Stearman, Gardner, Rodwell, Tomkins, Mancienne, Driver, Rose.
Referee: Bjorn Kuipers (Holland).
So Lewis misses out, interesting. Thats a pretty strong line-up consdering the suspended players. No room in the starting 11 for Chelsea's Michael Mancienne or Everton's teenage sensation Jack Rodwell.
Stick around...It's England v Germany at 2.45 EST.
I'm hoping that it's victory that Stuart Pearce smells of. The sweet smell of victory. Bigus has everything crossed. Everything!Scott and Joe Lewis was my toughest decision, no doubt about it. The first thing Joe did was congratulate Scotty, which is exactly what I'd expect from him.
- Pearce on Loach getting the nod between the sticks instead of Joe Lewis.
They have kicked off in Sweden and England have had an early chance, Milner cross headed over by Crainie.
6 mins: England looking good. Had a couple of chances and keeping the ball. Germany are sporting a red kit with a black stripe. Hmmm. They look like Blackburn. Lets hope they play like Blackburn.
Watching in French is a little odd. Theres a female commentator with a very nice voice. Key-ron Geeeebs.
15 mins: Pretty even now, Germany just had a spell of possession, but the England defence stood firm. Dig in lads!
24 mins: Ah Fu%k, F@ckety bollocks. Germany score. After some good play by England, Germany counter and Ozil feeds Castro, who cooly finishes past Loach. Up til then we looked good. 'Tee-yo Walcourt' is running like a mad man and the midfield looked in control. Oh well.
England 0 Germany 1.
27 mins: Milner (or Meeeelnehr) tricks two German dudes, strides into the area and falls under pressure? Penno? Could have been, but the ref says NO. Bastard. Some good work by Milner. Camon England!
33 mins: England playing some very nice football, but looking a little vulnerable against the break. On two occasions Germany have busted through. This young German team is very, very direct. England have the nice build-up but no final ball.
HT 1 nil Germany. I gotta run folks. Lingering Bursitis is now at your service. Take it away, LB.
HALF TIME: England 0, Germany 1
So imagine my surprise when a pleasant Monday afternoon is disrupted by the Canary, insisting I cover the 2nd half of this tournament final. My inner patriot was still asleep at the time after a long midnight drive back from the beach, but he's awake and munching on snacks and eagerly awaiting the Gangbusters-esque comeback by our lads after the break.
After all, England hasn't won any official tournament of note since 1993 when our youngsters, including a pre-pubescent Robbie Fowler, Gary Neville and Paul Scholes (and QPR legend Kevin Gallen!), won this very same trophy.
Now, I look at the squad and wonder just how heavily they will dash our dreams of World Cup success in 2014.
Almost ready for the restart... I must find a beer for this. What little of the first half I did catch online was decent to say the least; I had no clue James Milner was that young, and I had no idea that Fabrice Muamba was English either.
46 mins: Sub for England, with Nedum Onuoha off and Michael Mancienne on.
47 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL... dear oh dear. Mr. Loach between the posts will need some treatment for PTSD after that absolute clanger, lest he lose all confidence and turn into the 2nd coming of Paul Robinson. Ozil beat him from 35 yards with a speculative free-kick that spun, looped, swirled and fizzed through the night sky and 'twixt Loach's slippery grasp. Nail in the coffin? England 0, Germany 2
50 mins: Sadly, our lads look rather cumbersome on the ball, with heavy first touches across the midfield and a rather formulaic approach to goal. What's even sadder is that the Germans are playing with the kind of free-spirited passing that betrays their Teutonic roots.
53 mins: Loach is off his line in a flash to collect Ozil's sharp through-ball before it can be guided into his net.
56 mins: Boateng comes close to further compounding the Limey misery, nodding a freekick over the bar. A decent chance.
60 mins: Fun fact stolen from the Guardian! Should the Krauts win tonight, they'll hold all 3 youth trophies at the same time, a feat that has never been done before. U-21, U-19, and U-17 silverware all sitting in Munich. We'll have to bomb again to get it out.
62 mins: TENSION IN THE GERMAN BOX! England's best move of the game ends up without a goal - Milner bobbed and weaved to the touchline and cut it back for Johnson, who did everything right inches from goal to direct it in... shame Beck did everything even righter in scooping it out at the last second.
65 mins: Sebastian Boenisch channels his inner Schumacher and just-about murders Milner with a shockingly awful challenge that threatens to ignite World War 3 in ol' Stuart Pearce on the sideline. He stomps furiously on the whitewash denoting the edge of his FIFA-approved safe manager technical strategy zone to protest the tackle... the Kraut does end up with a yellow card for his ferocity.
67 mins: In the 30-odd minutes I've watched, this Ozil fellow has been rather good, and he almost makes it 3-0, skipping infield from a quickly-taken corner and firing hard into the side netting. Werder Bremen has themselves a gem of a midfielder there.
German sub: Auf Wiedersehen to Fabian Johnson, a hearty 'Allo to Daniel Schwaab.
70 mins: England go mighty close yet again! Milner's corner is a tease across goal, and Lee Cattermole's glancing header is brilliant pummeled off the line by Beck, the defender who's clearly got instincts as a goalie.
74 mins: The game's being played at a snail's pace, as Germany are comfy with a 2-0 lead and England are lacking the finesse or urgency to fashion themselves a lifeline.
77 mins: Germany again come close to scoring another... Ozil put a gorgeous ball across the face of goal with Loach all at sea, but Sandro Wagner can't slide in to give it the goalward nudge it needed from three yards out.
78 mins: Oh wait... GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and less than 45 seconds after that awful miss, Sandro Wagner atones with Germany's third. The fantastic, electric Mehmet Ozil is again the instigator, cantering up the gut of the English defense and knocking ahead for Wagner, whose cool finish under Loach showed some remarkable self-confidence. Another pretty goal from those ugly, ugly Krauts. I fear the '10s will be dominated by Germany and their embarrassment of teen soccer-playing riches. England 0, Germany 3
79 mins: Sub for England, too little, too late: Jack Rodwell on, Muamba off. Micah Richards is also playing as a striker. So crazy.
83 mins: Can I go home now?
84 mins: I'll take a minute instead to pat my blog on the back for its superb coverage of the Confederations Cup, aka "The Cup that should be in Chicago or wherever US Soccer is based", as we managed to liveblog every single game, including Iraq/South Africa. Not many others on the web managed that, if any.
Next summer will be an awful lot of fun. We'll also liveblog the heck out of the Swiss Super League to show that we're unbiased when it comes to covering tiny tournaments.
85 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and we're looking at fodder for next summer's World Cup media, folks, as the Germans are relentless. It's Sandro Wagner again, and his finish was even lovelier than his last. Taking possession wide on the left, he gave himself a few steps before a pretty, curling finish inside the far post that left Loach rather helpless. England 0, Germany 4
Sub for Germany: Mats Hummels off, Dennis "Wake Me Up Before You" Aogo on.
88 mins: Ze Germans are not content with four, as they treat the English third of the pitch like their own private Sudetenland after a halftime handshake with Pearce allowing them to do so.
90 mins: Subs and curtaincalls time: Ozil off, Marcel Schmelzer on.
@MikeGeorger - no clue, although I do know that Kroos wasn't in the squad for the tournament.
FULL TIME: England 0, Germany 4
Let's look at the England Explanation/Rationalization Index:
1. Hey, we still made a final.
2. It's good experience for our youth, even though we were crushed. It will steel them for the future.
3. Bulletin Board material for the World Cup squad! C'mon lads, don't let the Germans treat our kiddies like this! Time for revenge!
4. Hey, we still beat 'em 5-1 in Munich back in 2001.
Sad fact is, a lot of these lads ply their trade weekly in the EPL, and without all the expensive foreign tosh in accompaniment, they looked rather ordinary and were torn apart with ease by a tiny, diminutive-looking German midfielder with frosted tips. Mehmet Ozil was a revelation tonight, and Sandro Wagner's late brace was sweet too. Not much to cheer about if you're Three Lions-friendly.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Under 21 European Championships: The Final!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Under 21 European Championships: An Update
Jack Rodwell of Everton.
England and Germany both went through to the semi finals last night as the two sides met and fought out a 1-1 draw. England's under 21 coach, Stuart Pearce, made ten changes from the team that beat Spain 2 nil last week. Only Adam Johnson remained in the side as Pearce rested his squad.
Germany took the lead when Chelsea center back Michael Mancienne lost Jermaine Boateng and the young German fed his team mate Gonzalo Castro, who fired his side ahead after just 5 mins.
Everton youngster Jack Rodwell equalized for England from a Craig Gardner corner on 29 mins.
Theo Walcott was once again on the bench for the young lions. He was a second half substitute replacing Fraizer Campbell. Peterborough keeper Joe Lewis also saw action during the second half as the two teams played out a stalemate.
The point means England finish the group stage at the top of group B.
England will now play in a semi final on Friday, facing the runner up from group A. Germany will face the group A winner in the other semi.
England and Germany's semi final opponents will be known later today after the following group A deciders.
Belarus V Italy
Serbia V Sweden
Both games kick off at 2.45 ET. To learn more about the Under 21 Championships and to view the tables, go here.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Who is the mystery woman training with Germany?
Let me get this out of the way before I forget, because between this post and the new Aberdeen kit, Football Fashion is my site of the day. Plus, if I didn't do it now, I'd probably be too spent after looking and relooking at all of the pictures ahead.
Britta Heidemann is quite the fencer. She won Gold in the individual epee this past summer in Beijing. She's a Leverkusen gal, and, like the local soccer team, is sponsored by Bayer. These days, she splits her time between Germany and her second home in China. Needless to say, Heidemann was probably quite happy when the German men's team decided to go to China for a friendly. Next thing you know, there she is at training with the Mannschaft, one top athlete working out with other top athletes.
Oh, and did I mention she has done Playboy? Yeah, there's a NSFW pic after the jump.
With the team. Look closely for the Bayer pin
I dunno, but I like this one
Coach Loew keeping a close eye on the proceedings
It would be a little misleading to say Heidemann is a Playboy model. She appeared in a 2004 (I'm guessing) female athlete-themed issue in the German version of the magazine. It's safe to say that she's not going to show up on the next season of Hugh Hefner Gets Better Trim Than You, or whatever it's called. Still, nudes are nudes, and hers are pretty swell.
I'll leave you here with one oddly-censored photograph from the shoot. If that whets your whistle, then head on over here for a couple of more uncensored ones. Enjoy.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Behold The Power of Democracy!
Voting rules. Ahh... see what I did there?
Anyway, this was mentioned in Backpasses (see post below) but The Offside is asking for your input. They want to know which is the most exciting league in Europe.
We're mostly EPL over here, with a smattering of France and the Scots but we're actively trying to consume more Italy and Spain (Mmmmm... Spain).
And frankly we all should. Why? Because Spain has been awesome this season. Easily the two most exciting matches I've seen this season were the 3-3 Valencia v. Villarreal tilt, and this past weekend's 4-3 win by Atlético over a suddenly shaken Barcelona side.
On top of that, having less emotional attachment seems to make watching, uhm... what's the word? Enjoyable. That's it. Watching Spanish football is kind of fun. They score even (fucking Arsenal).
We're not big believers in the "scoring = excitement" premise, but the EPL does lag behind Spain by about a half goal per match.
More interesting, the EPL is barely ahead of Italy, which gets abused for its supposed boring and defensive football. That link above takes some going through, but if you scroll down you'll see the current scoring hierarchy goes: Germany > Spain > England > Italy > France.
Our cursory theory on the low EPL output is threefold: A) The relegation battle is so tight with so many teams, they they are playing to not concede anything to anyone. A 0-0 draw is a fantastic result for a bottom-table team. B) Arsenal alone is responsible for this low average scoring. C) There is no need to explain, this season's average is pretty much in line with the scoring averages for the last 3-4 EPL seasons.
Anyway, go vote (*cough* Spain *cough*), it's your duty as a Netizen. And if you don't, the terrorists win.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
The Good, The Bad, The WTF *Now Doubly Updated*
Color me impressed. Initially, I thought the eBay listing for this week's shirt was full of bunk. After a good five minutes of interweb searching, I find out it's only halfway full of bunk. Good on you, eBay seller sunglasses-de.
Back on September 11, 1991 (make your own joke here), Germany visited England for a friendly. Because both teams wear white, Germany was compelled to put on its away shirt. Adidas had reworked the away shirt since the last time the two teams met in World Cup 90, and had brought it in line, design-wise, with the home shirt that Germany won the World Cup in. That was a mistake. How bad of a mistake? See for yourself below.
Ay yi yi. I would curse in German, but I have no idea how to do those extra-squiggly B things on my computer. Even as a life-long Dolphins fan, I realize that there are just some times you don't go with this shade of green. Like when the rest of your outfit consists of red, black and yellow. Mind-numbingy hideous.
As the eBay seller correctly points out, this version of the German NT shirt only saw pitch time once, in that aforementioned friendly against England. From there he extrapolates that since he only remembers players wearing long-sleeves that night, and this one has a number on it, this must be some über-rare shirt that's worth a thousand pounds. Mmm, okay.
As you can see from this lovely back shot that's not exactly a number style that would be hard to replicate. I'm sure any screenprinter from 1960 on could heat-transfer that on there for you without much of a problem.
So where does the high price come from? Well, the seller thinks this might be a training shirt. He has no proof to back it up, only the high price and the hopes that someone fails at reading comprehension. Good luck, German dude!
Looking at this shirt leaves me with one question. In the hopes that someone will be able to answer it, I will gift a youtube for you below. Where did Germany pull this color green from for its away shirts? Why did they used it for so long before dropping it of late as their second shirt color?
Update: Bill, from the wonderful Bill Sports Maps (so good, even my mom sent me a link to it), answers my question. He earned you a video!Germany wore green as their second jersey for many years, in honor of Ireland. Ireland was the only national team willing to play Germany, right after World War II, as the rest of the world was still mad about the whole Nazism/genocide/invasion thing.
As promised, a gift from the youtube. As you probably know, Jurgen Klinsmann arrived at Tottenham in the mid-'90s with the reputation as a bit of a diver. He jokingly played into that stereotype with his diving goal celebration once at Spurs. I think the reputation came from England fans, peeved at losing in PKs to Germany in the 1990 World Cup, who watched the Final and saw this. Behold, one of the greatest dives I have ever seen.
Second (and maybe final) update: I've done some digging on the subject and come up with the following possibilities. Unfortunately, none are definitive, as such a reason has been lost to the sands of time.
1. what Bill said (which is disputed everywhere it is brought up)
1a. That Ireland were the first team to agree to a friendly after WWII. Plausible, I think.
2. That it is out of respect for Ireland staying neutral in WWII. Why not the Swiss red then? Besides, Ireland was still under the yoke of commonwealth until 1949.
3. German passports were green. Whatever
4. The DFB colors were green and white. (from the DFB, but based on supposition since no one wrote down why they did so)
5. West Germany's capital was Bonn, in the Rhineland. Rhineland's traditional colors (from heraldry) were Green and Silver. This information was based on the idea that one very strong man (whose name I forget) was in charge of everything. You may count this as the historical perspective.
I guess the real answer may never be known.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Bundesliga Watch
You know, the post title would be much better if this were Switzerland, but what can you do? Since it is undoubtedly Germany Day here on UF (on Armistice Day, no less), with one, two, three stories so far, why not add another one? A quick look at the woefully-ignored-by-us Bundesliga thus far will do nicely, I think.
The story, so far, tn Germany is undoubtedly that of TSG Hoffenheim. The small-town club (and I do mean small--population 3000) is in its first season in the Bundesliga and acquitting themselves quite nicely. How nicely? Well, until a 1-0 loss at Hertha Berlin this weekend, the team was in first place. That's pretty damn swell, I think. This is not your usual small club, though. They are backed financially by Dietmar Hopp, one of the founders of SAP. Hopp used to play for the youth side of Hoffenheim, and has used his billions to build the squad up. As it stands, this is a very international club now, with players from nine countries on the squad, including three cherished Brazilians. This season is a transition season for the club, as they are moving out of their former 5000-seat stadium into a newly-built 30,000 seater. What remains to be seen is if the club can fill those seats when the newness of the Bundesliga wears off.
Sitting atop the Bundesliga at this point is Landycake's former club, Bayer Leverkusen. Leverkusen hold the slightest of leads at this point, being even on points with Hoffenheim, while holding a one goal better goal diffential. Since Hoffenheim are also the top scoring team in the league, this is a tight race. Leverkusen ascended to the top after a scrappy 3-3 draw with Karlsruhe on Saturday. High scoring games are not the norm for Leverkusen, as their four previous results had been 2-0 wins since an early October 1-0 loss to . . . Hertha Berlin. Head to head with Hoffenheim, however, Leverkusen hold the advantage having topped the small club 5-2 in the season's third week. There is also a big match upcoming with perennial favorites Bayern Munich in three week's time.
Bayern Munich sit third in the table, one point behind the top two. They must be considered the hot team right now, having run off 19 points in the last seven matches since a disappointing 2-2-2 start. Whereas Jurgen Klinsmann was probably on the early hot seat before, the team is looking much more solid now. Klinsi's big question right now must be why the hell he would care about bringing in Donovan. He is replete with attacking options to the point of Lukas Podolski--the Pole transplant who starts and scores copiously for the German national side--cannot be considered a starter for his club team. Tough times are ahead for the American.
Through the middle of the table, there are some weird issues with team's records and their goal differentials. Fourth-place Hamburg have a 7-2-3 record, but have an even goal differential despite the four more wins than losses. The fact that all three of their losses have been 3-0 definitely plays into that. On the other hand, there is Werder Bremen. This is an up and own team who, despite holding a 4-5-3 record, have a +5 GD, which leaved them 10th in the 18 team Bundesliga. It must be because they can pump in the goals at times, having put up 5 against Hoffenheim (5-4), Bayern (5-2, away!) and Hertha (5-1).
What of this Hertha team that keeps getting mentioned? They sit 5th currently, four points behind the leaders. Between 5th and 11th is pretty hotly contested with Schalke, Wolfsburg, Koln, Borussia Dortmund, and Stuttgart joining Werder and Hertha therein.
From Stuttgart, there is a gap to the third tier of the Bundesliga. Four points separate the 2007 champs from 12th place Eintracht Frankfurt who in turn hold a one point lead over Hannover 96. Borussia Moenchengladbach and Karlruhe sit a little further back in the last safe spots.
Sixteenth place in the Bundesliga goes into a two-leg playoff against the third-placed team from 2.Bundesliga. Currently, the 16th place team is VfL Bochum. The final two spots in the table are held by the woefully out of form sides Arminia Bielefeld and Energie Cottbus. When it comes down to it, Bielefeld has the better chance of surviving, while Cottbus have the look of EPL's Derby County last season. They have one win against eight losses with three draws. Who did that win come against? Hertha, of course. Who else?
Monday, October 13, 2008
How Do You Say "Boo Hoo" in German?
As if the Cole saga and the Kris Boyd moaning weren't enough, it appears that Poor/Afflicted Footballer Syndrome has reached the mainland, and in particular, the German national team.
Kevin Kuranyi, the prolific 26-year-old Bundesliga striker (84 goals in 202 games is decent, right?), was a little disgruntled about being omitted from the 18-man squad for the World Cup qualifier against Russia over the weekend, so much so that he upped and left at half-time.
The end result? Manager Joachim Low doesn't want him back as long as he's in charge.
Here's hoping young Kevin feels good about his decision in the long-term. He didn't get picked for one game, and now he's out of the running for any future Germany games? Sure, it's predicated upon Low being in charge, but do you think any future coach is going to feel enamored to pick this malcontent?
Reports suggested that Kuranyi was about to retire from international duty shortly, but it's the classic "You can't quit... you're fired!" routine as Low beat him to the punch:
"As a coach, you have got to make decisions like this and you expect that some are hurt or disappointed, but that is my job and the players have got to accept it. It would have been advisable for him to come and talk to me or one of my colleagues. But none of us knew what had happened - we just sat on the bus and waited for him. I am disappointed with the way he acted. I can understand his disappointment, but he should not overreact - that is not right."Kuranyi's having a tough season, but it doesn't excuse such petulant behavior. Germany are having a difficult time finding strikers who can score goals (something I thought England were struggling with, although not recently!), but he would have had another turn sooner or later. Klose couldn't score a goal if the posts were a mile apart, so it was merely a matter of time until the Wheel of Fortune landed on him again.
And yet, it wasn't enough for ol' Kevin, and now he's going to have plenty of spare time not helping his country to win their first significant tournament since 1996.
So, another sob story invades the news landscape. Who's next: Karim Benzema? Someone Portuguese? Antonio Cassano pulling a gun on Marcelo Lippi?
Read more on "How Do You Say "Boo Hoo" in German?"...
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
German Humans Not the Only Ones Sucking At Futbol
In an impressive display of national unity, a catfish decided to symbolically show its support for the German national team... by sucking.
And this being a catfish, it cost him his life.
A catfish was found dead in a Bavarian canal having choked to death on a soccer ball. The 6-and-a-half-foot-long fish was floating lifeless on the surface with a blew blue and white soccer ball lodged in it mouth.
Police first responded, "Holy shit, that's a huge fucking catfish," then settled down to release the following more prosaic statement: "Whether the fish was caught up in soccer ball fever in the aftermath of the European championship and hence snapped at the ball can unfortunately not be determined," police said in a statement.
German humor, only slight less bad than the German National Team's recent performances in the finals of major tournaments.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Euro 2008 Liveblog: Germany v. Spain
Okay kids, this is it! You know where we stand in terms of predictions, but we have yet to hear from you clowns. Let's get some suggestions in early, before the match gets too far underway. Germany v. Spain! Wienerschnitzel v. tapas. Berlin v. Barcelona. BMW v...Oh well. Hopefully you are in a good mood and ready for today's match. Personally, I am ecstatic, as I have been watching Landon Donovan cry in HD thanks to the abuse heaped upon him and the LA Galaxy by DC United. After the jump, all the details.
The starting XI for Joachim Low's German squad:
GK: Lehmann (tee-hee; all EPL fans assume at least 1 howler is in order)
DEF: Friedrich; Mertesacker; Metzelder; Lahm
MID: Hitzlsperger; Ballack (C); Frings; Podolski; Schweinsteiger
ST: Klose
Notes on Germany: Obviously, the big news here is that Ballack is fit and will start, although talk has immediately turned to whether he was simply providing a pre-made excuse in the case of a poor performance. Germany plays a modified 4-5-1, which in practice resembles a 4-3-3, with Podolski and Schweinsteiger both acting as offensive midfielders/defensive forwards.
The starting XI for Luis Aragones' Spain squad:
GK: Casillas (C)
DEF: Sergio Ramos; Marchena; Puyol; Capdevila
MID: Senna; Iniesta; Xavi Hernandez; Silva; Fabregas (finally!)
ST: Torres
Notes on Spain: The Spanish side plays a 4-1-4-1, with Senna acting as the lone defensive midfielder. Also, Aragones is a racist.
The match is being played at Ernst-Happel Stadion in Vienna, Austria.
Centre official: Roberto Rosetti (ITA)
Assistant referees: Alessandro Griselli (ITA); Paolo Calcagno (ITA)
4th official: Peter Frojdfeldt (SWE)
Is anyone out there, or am I blogging with myself?
00:01 - And we're off!
01:00 - Throw-in from Torres put out, resulting in a throw for Ze Germans.
01:50 - The boobirds come out as Spain opens up very timidly, moving the ball in their defensive third of the pitch.
02:55 - Bad touch from Ramos forced by Schweinsteiger, but Klose is unable to get off a shot.
03:43 - Long ball from Silva, but Torres is offside.
04:27 - More offense from the Germans, as Podolski plays Lahm at the endline, but he is unable to cross the ball in-bounds.
05:56 - Sergio Ramos pushes forward, and the ball eventually gets to Capdevila, who is about 28 yards offsides.
06:59 - Ballack gets loose on the left around Puyol, but the ball served across the goal doesn't find anyone waiting for it.
08:24 - Klose pushes the ball into the middle for Hitzlsperger, but the quiet midfielder gets off a very weak shot. Too easy for Casillas.
09:16 - The Germans are moving the ball much better than the Spaniards. The crowd is still booing, although that might be residual from Enrique Iglesias' performance.
10:54 - Poor ball forward for the Spaniards, and Torres and Mertesacker get tangled up. No foul, as the ball was already firmly in Lehmann's hands.
11:10 - Klose earns a corner. The resulting kick by Schweinsteiger is punched out by Casillas, straight to the Germans. Frierich delivers a ball into the box which is grabbed by Casillas.
12:29 - Torres is fouled by Lahm, but the Spaniards play the resulting kick back into the midfield. They are very tentative.
13:50 - Torres drives the ball into Iniesta, but it comes off Metzelder, which forces Lehmann into an excellent save. The corner is played short to Iniesta, back to Xavi, who puts forth a poor cross.
16:09 - Spanish free kick from 35 yards, and the ball goes directly to Lehmann. Very poor effort.
Ed's note: I am not impressed by Torsten Frings' tale of pain. I once broke 3 ribs in the first game of my rec season, and played 3 more games before I realized it. Suck it, Torsten!
18:51 - Deep ball from Silva to Torres, and Metzelder hacks at Torres resulting in a free kick. The ball from Xavi finds Torres, who heads it over the goal.
21:26 - Ballack fouls Xavi as he passes the ball to Cesc. The free kick is played back to the Spanish midfield, and then back forward for Fabregas. He gets it to Torres, who puts it off the post and Sergio Ramos and Capdevila both muff chances at the follow.
24:11 - Podolski earns a corner. Schweinsteiger puts in a ball that is too low, but his second ball comes out to the far post. Ballack receives the ball and fires the ball into Xavi. On the Spanish break-out, Lehmann goofs and has to put the ball out. The resulting throw-in leads to a low shot taken cleanly by Jens.
26:23 - Klose plays the ball through to Podolski, but he is unable to find Hitzlsperger in the middle.
During discussion of NASCAR, we find out that Andy Gray was treating a lady-friend to some shopping yesterday. Fascinating!
28:28 - Ballack is fouled by Senna, and Lahm takes the free kick quickly, but the Spanish take control.
28:51 - Torres gets loose, but Metzelder is able to track him down and put the ball out. The corner kick is played in, but the Spaniards are called for a foul in the box (Sergio Ramos).
30:21 - Silva plays the ball out, resulting in a throw for Lahm. Silva has some words for the AR, who doesn't seem interested. The ball comes back out to Fabregas, who puts in a low shot that is taken cleanly by Lehmann.
32:20 - GOAL! Spain 1 - Germany 0. Torres gets loose once again, this time darting between two German defenders (Lahm and Mertesacker). Lehmann comes out for it, but Torres pokes it over him.
34:10 - Iniesta gets forward and plays the ball to Silva, who puts it way over the goal. The Spaniards have their tails up.
35:11 - Ballack is bleeding, although it's not clear where the cut came from. Ah, it appears it was a head-butt from Senna.
36:01 - Schweinsteiger draws a free kick at 30 yards out. The kick is played into the box, but it skies over the bar.
The replays really demonstrate just how brilliant the goal was from Torres. He beats 2 German defenders (one of whom, Lahm, is arguably the team's best) with his speed, and then beats Lehmann with a smart touch.
37:49 - Ballack fouls Fabregas, and is then sent off again for blood streaming down his face.
39:11 - Schweinsteiger is fouled by Capdevila, although it's a soft call. Hitzlsperger plays the ball into the box, but the ref calls it back since he hadn't blown the whistle. The stoppage actually gives Ballack a chance to get back in. The second kick is played into the box and put out by Senna for a corner. The third kick of this series is played out by Casillas, directly to the Germans, who earn another corner. That ball is played out to the top of the box, and played out by Xavi before Hitzlsperger can perform the bicycle kick.
41:31 - Ballack gets involved in an altercation, and Casillas comes flying out of net to push him away. They both earn a yellow card for their trouble.
43:18 - Free kick for Spain near midfield, and it gets played all the way back to Casillas. Fabregas moves forward with the ball, but is dispossessed by Schweinsteiger. The ball is played into Metzelder, but the Spanish respond well, and get the ball up to Iniesta, who earns a corner. The resulting kick is played short to Senna, who eventually plays it into the box. Sergio Ramos goes down trying to earn a PK, but the ref waves it off.
45:00 (+01:00) - Halftime. Spain 1 - Germany 0 on a brilliant goal from Torres.
u75 has posited that all which Ballack has contributed today is chipping at the ankles of the Spaniards, which is a bit unfair. He has also bled on them.
45:00 - Friedrich off, Jansen on for Germany to start the half. CORRECTION - It's Lahm who is off.
46:01 - Klose goes down in a heap after a pass from Frings, but he was offsides.
48:09 - Fabregas to Iniesta, but Frings recovers the ball and is then fouled. Andy Gray isn't happy with the call.
49:01 - Torres is taken down, but no foul is given. Andy Gray disagrees with this call also.
50:09 - Torres is caught offsides, and Klose takes a boot to the coinpurse.
Signal to Noise has put in a vote for Senna as "best under-the-radar player" for the tournament. Luis Aragones doesn't think that he should be eligible, since he is black.
52:46 - Fabregas to Torres to Xavi, who puts the shot wide.
53:29 - Corner for Spain, as apparently Lehmann got a hand onto the ball. The kick comes out to Silva, who puts a shot on goal. Sergio Ramos tries to redirect the shot, but it goes wide.
54:43 - Xavi slides the ball through for Torres, but Lehmann comes out quickly and manages to make the save this time.
56:58 - Frings tackles Iniesta, who goes down in a heap. Looked worse than it actually was.
57:22 - Karanyi on, Hitzlsperger off for Germany. Karanyi will play up top with Klose.
57:49 - Good build-up from Spain, and ends up with Sergio Ramos putting the ball across the goal mouth and over the endline.
59:00 - Puyol coughs up the ball, and it comes to Schweinsteiger who touches it for Ballack. The shot goes just wide, hitting the side netting.
59:11 - Karanyi is called offside, but he looked to be even.
60:01 - Torres goes down after a kiss from Metzelder, and the crowd boos. No foul is called. The counter-attack comes out to Ballack, who crosses for Karanyi. Casillas barely manages to get to it.
61:23 - Schweinsteiger plays a beautiful ball for Klose, but Sergio Ramos guides it out. The Spanish counter-attack results in Torres being taken down, but the free kick goes nowhere. The Germans attack again, but Schweinsteiger puts the ball out off Klose.
62:54 - Fabregas off, Xabi Alonso on for the Spaniards in a defensive move.
63:01 - A bit of the argy-bargy as Silva and Podolski jaw at each other. Silva barely moves his head, and Podolski immediately grabs his eye. The ref ignores everyone, particularly Ballack who is trying to get a red for Silva.
65:49 - The ball comes off Metzelder's hand, resulting in a free kick. The ball is played into the box, and Sergio Ramos gets off a blistering header that is stopped by Jens.
67:01 - The resulting corner is played quickly, and the shot comes tearing in but Frings clears it off the post. The ball makes its way back to Iniesta, who pokes it towards Jens. The save is made, and Spain earn a throw-in.
69:40 - Jansen earns a free kick by running into Sergio Ramos' back. The ball is played by Frings into the box, but Casillas punches it clear.
71:48 - Casillas is bent over in some pain. It may be stomach or groin pain, but it's more likely a jammed finger.
Apparently, I missed a substitution, since Cazorla is running around the pitch for for Spain. Possibly on for Marchena.
73:33 - Torres earns a yellow card for an accidental headbutt of Metzelder. Poor decision by the referee.
75:00 - Torres gets loose, but his touch to get around Mertesacker is too heavy and goes directly to Jens.
76:10 - Good pressure from Spain, but Torres is unable to get past the German defense. The ball is played out for a corner, which results in nothing.
77:25 - Guiza on, Torres off for Spain. Gomez on, Klose off for Germany.
78:00 - Lehmann gets away with playing the ball off his arm just outside the box. The ball bounces around midfield, and the Spaniards come back with Iniesta to Xavi to Capdevila, who puts a shot low directly at Lehmann. The Germans try to counter with Schweinsteiger in space where Capdevila should be defending, but it comes to nothing.
80:50 - The Spaniards attack again, and Guiza heads the ball back toward Senna, who just misses scoring the killing goal.
82:00 - Guiza comes down 1-on-4, and draws a corner. The resulting kick is useless. Germany play the ball out, but it comes back to Senna who is fouled. Xavi puts the ball over the bar.
86:00 - Karanyi offsides as the Germans continue to push.
87:01 - Yellow card for Karanyi for a late tackle.
89:58 - Late German pressure, but Gomez fouls Capdevila.
90:00 (+00:55) - Podolski takes the ball off Capdevila, but is unable to find Gomez.
90:00 (+01:24) - Xavi takes the ball into the corner, and then to Cazorla, who lays it off to Xabi Alonso. Long kick from Lehmann and the Spaniards earn a free kick.
90:00 (+02:25) - Throw-in for Germany in their own end. Lehmann almost gives the ball right back to them, but Schweinsteiger plays the ball long. Puyol gets a head on it, and sends Metzelder to the turf at the same time. No foul called, and the whistle blows after Casillas' kick.
90:00 (+03:00) - FULL TIME. Spain 1 - Germany 0.
A really quick, hungover preview of today's festivities
Die Mannshaft. La Seleccion. Cooly efficient Teutonic machinery against the emotional, flamboyant, insanely skilled Spanish. And about a million other timeworn national cliches. ESPN is even bringing up the Holocaust. Yes, it can only mean the final is upon us. A quick UF preview, after the jump.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Euro 2008 Liveblog: Germany v. Turkey
Soccer is a game for 22 people that run around, play the ball, and one referee who makes a slew of mistakes, and in the end Germany always wins. - Gary Lineker
That's it, I surrender. There is no way my new-favorite team (Euros only) comes back from this one. Word is that Turkey will have about 14 available players for this one, with one of the subs being the third-choice keeper. There is absolutely no way they play their way past the Germans, is there?
It's still 11-on-11 on the pitch, no matter what kind of superiority in numbers the German bench has. There is an outside chance, however slight, that Turkey can do this. It is up to me today, UF's least-disciplined liveblogger, to bring this one to you today. Join me as I dissect what will surely be a 5-0 German win
Lineups:
Germany (4-5-1): Lehmann; Friedrich, Mertesacker, Lahm, Rolfes, Metzelder; Schweinsteiger, Ballack, Hitzlsperger, Podolski; Klose. Screw you, ESPN
Turkey (4-5-1): Rustu, Balta, Gokhan Zan, Sabri, Boral; Topal, Aurelio, Altintop, Kazim, Akman; Senturk.
So, Podolski starts up top, and presumably Gomez is banished to the Black Forest. While you are waiting for the match to start, go check out some Germany highlights in Lego form Here and Here.
note: The Likely Lad, who had hoped to live blog this game from a Turkish restaurant, will still be at said restaurant. He'll be sending us updates on his fancy phone, some of which we will pass on to you.
note mark II: For those who need your weekly Good, Bad, WTF fix, that will be going up at 6.00. Just hold out, it's worth it.
-10 .00 ESPN is on. Foudy is foudying it up. Schweinsteiger is Art Alexakis, to continue with my "Looks like a guy who got played on MTV in the '90s" analogies.
-7.00 It looks like The Likely Lad is not one you should rob. He just confessed to living in NYC without a Blackberry.
-4.00 Get ready for the anthems. Will Kazim Kazim sing?
-3.00 I'll admit, I'm openly rooting for a Lehmann mistake or two to send Turkey through. Can they naturalize David Healy for this match?
That sucks, Chad. But welcome anyway. I'll try to be faster than ESPN 360.
-1.00 Uh oh, Lehmann looks short in this lineup. You can't teach height, as we found out from Koller in my last liveblog.
Rustu!, Ballack! Speak English, fuckers!
0.00 Kick Off! Let's go! Turkey actually have 7 subs on the bench. We'll see if more than two get off of it.
2.00 The field in Basel still doesn't look any better. Germany content to possess early and make Turkey run.
3.00 I wonder if Loew will have significant pit stains like last game in the stands. And does he have all of his shirts hemmed like that, or what?
5.00 I wouldn't want to run into Terim at a shady NYC Turkish restaurant, I'll tell you that.
6.00 Turkey get a couple of crosses in, but come to nothing.
7.00 Kazim gets a shot off, right at Lehmann. Turkey are pushing forward when they get the ball. Probably trying to steal an early goal and then sit back.
Lehmann forced into another save when Lahm blows it.
9.00 TLL update:
Been here 5 minutes and have already gotten in trouble. Started a
tab. with my credit card. with my name... my last name which means
WAR in German. They tried to seat me behind the TV . Only got out by
ordering $14 doner entree
11.00 Germany are definitely sitting back early and not trying to push and pull a depleted Turk squad. Odd.
12.00 Another Turkish foray up front. They'll be dead by 60 minutes at this pace.
13.00 Dear Germany, playing balls in the air to a lone, unsupported striker 40 yards out won't win you anything.
And Kazim off the crossbar! Follow-up shot goes a yard wide for a corner. This team is going all out, as alluded to in the comment section. Corner goes for nothing.
15.00 Turkey are getting in behind the German defense. Looks good, so far for the Turks.
16.00 Klose writhes in pain after attempted tackle misses him. Free kick straight to Rustu.
17.00 Schweinie dives, no call. Germany still on attack. Cleared out for corner.
18.00 Ballack could not push his way to the corner, cleared by Rustu.
19.00 As I clarified up top, both teams are running a 4-5-1. We hate the 4-5-1 at UF.
20.00 TLL is predicting a riot if Turkey do win.
22.00 Goal! Turkey go on top after a cross from the right is directed off the crossbar. The rebound falls to Boral who puts it through Lehmann's legs 1-0 Turkey
23.00 That's Boral's first international goal.
24.00 Well, they have their goal. Do Turkey sit back, or do they attack some more? Germany look disinterested in playing at all.
25.00 Aurelio does not get enough of his head on a corner to bother the Germans. The game is still in the German defensive third for the most part.
26.00 Goal! Scheinie latches onto a Rolled Podolski cross from the right. Touches it into the upper back corner 1-1
27.00 Totally against the run of play there. Can't fault the soft finish. It was very nice. Rustu in no position to do anything.
28.00 Two rather old keepers here. Will that be a factor in the end? Neither looked good on the goals, but then keepers rarely look good when giving up goals.
29.00 Easy header collected by Jens. Another close call on the other end. Corner for Germany.
31.00 TLL in the middle of a chaotic scene. Someone bought him a beer after the first goal. We'll see if he is still alive after the equalizer.
31.00 There it was, almost the quintessential Jens gaffe. He went out for a free kick that almost floated over his head into the goal. Corner kick cleared by Germany for another corner. Turks maintain possession.
33.00 TLL, still alive, informs us that the Turks hate Tommy Smyth, too.
34.00 Podolski gets free on the right, gets into the box, and blows it over the bar by two feet.
35.00 Jens has had to make 5 saves so far. Should've had 6.
36.00 Hey! I can watch MLS on this very same channel! At least the NBA is over.
38.00 Free kick Turkey right outside the box. Lahm tried to kick Kazim in the face. He missed, but still. Wall is set. Time being wasted. Kick taken as a near post shot, goes to the middle of the goal, Jens punch save.
39.00 Blood on Rolfes after he headed Akman in the back of the head. Both are off for treatment and stitches.
41.00 Game has opened up 10-on-10. Both sides push for shots. Turkey almost through on goal. Serioglu just over from 22.
42.00 Turkey look to have tired a bit.
44.00 Frings may have to come on for Rolfes. They haven't stopped his bleeding yet.
And Rolfes is back on, never mind.
45.00 +1 Tweet Tweet I am surprised by the lack of German passion. They are not really robots, are they? Also surprising--this rather undisciplined Turk squad have no first-half cards.
Back after the break, but before I go another TLL update:
Overheard of guy talking about Turkish football, "There is no pride in waiting, only in winning." That guy did not watch the first half of the Czech-Turk game, then.
TLL: 25 man smoke break at the restaurant.
Foudy: "Turkey is playing like they have nothing to lose" Both teams can go home here sweetie. It's not like Germany can make the final after a loss.
45.01 Here we go. Alright, I'm sick of coffee and too wired. Maybe Germany's play can bring me back down.
Frings on for Rolfes.
46.00 Podolski rampaging down the right, and crosses 20 yards past anyone.
47.00 Why did Demirel get a two-game ban and Schweinie only get one, anyway?
49.00 Lahm gets lucky not to get a yellow as he pulls back on a Turkish player who was past him.
50.00 TLL is still alive. He's at a table with a guy who speaks no English. They seem to agree that Lehmann is piss, though.
51.00 Lahm bundled over in the box. It looked bad, but no penalty.
52.00 RK5 = +1
52.00 Lahm definitely fouled. Probably outside the box, though. Ah, the benefits of replay to second-guess the ref.
52.00 TFA- thanks for the answer
53.00 Yellow Card Senturk for foul on Frings (?) I didn't see it, I was too busy laughing at RK5, still.
55.00 Germany is getting into the attack in the second half. Turkey may have done all they can do. Also, Turkey look to have gone to a 4-4-2.
Hitzlsperger over from 25.
56.00 Metzeleder down. Not touched on the sliding tackle. Still has a kick-ass playoff beard.
57.00 Altintop takes down Ballack dead center 28 yards out.
57.00 Ballack into the bottom of the wall. Black out!
58.00 This is in no way going to help my ESPN argument. Georger, you win!
59.00 I'll steal from soccernet if I can.
60.00 Tech problems in Switzerland (lightning), other networks have the same problem.
60?.00 Altintop over from distance on a free kick.
Okay, it seems to be affecting the Beeb as well. No picture making it out of the country, I'm afraid. Turkey had another off-target shot from 20 yards.
ESPN sez radio guy sez Turkey is toying with Germany. AND WE'RE BACK
66.00 And nothing of note.
67.00 Lahm easily beaten by Serioglu, but his cross goes to no one.
68.00 Sixth Turkish corner, only two for the Germans. Headed from the near post to the top of the box. Nada here, I'm afraid.
69.00 Are we really going to extra time again? Neither team incisive over the last seven or so minutes. Kazim appeals for foul, doesn't get it.
70.00 Lahm looks to be the weak spot for Germany's defense. Look for Turk attacks exclusively down the right in the last 20 minutes.
72.00 Jens content to waste time with free kick from offside call.
72.00 Of course, Turkey attack from the left and get a good look, but right at Jens. Hitzlsperger just wide from 30 or so the other way.
73.00 Yes, Tuncay's absence is felt by us all, I think.
75.00 *yawn*
76.00 Did they switch these teams for Italy-Spain in the blackout?
77.00 Bye Bye feed. Just as well.
TLL: First in-house cigarette is lit. the only thing my pal here says when
Turkey has the ball is, "In to Semih." Also the only englis hes
spoken... broken glass!! getting edgy in here. but im 3 rakis in,
feeling brave.
Germany miss from in close. Did Gomez get in?
78.00 Goal Klose. It was awesome. I wish you could have seen it.
At least ESPN has the fan zones to show.
Apparently Rustu blew it, maybe even Cech-style, on a cross.
Soccernet guy says he has feed again. Why don't we have ours?
Erding on for Akman.
Correction--BBC has pictures. Fuckers.
TEASE!
Turkey seem to be on a steady attack, but nothing in the net yet. Of course, stoppage time is still a little but away.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL 2-2 Serioglu
Both keepers now at fault. Lehmann beaten softly near post. Rustu way misjudged a cross and had the ball headed in front of him.
88.00 It's Turkey time now, bitches. 2 minutes from injury time.
89.00 Senturk tries a ridiculous shot one minute before he should have.
90.00 Goal Lahm goes near post. There's still time!
Fed in by Hizlsperger. No picture.
Rustu sucks balls. Five German shots on goal, three goals.
Time must be up by now. Two injury minutes on the clock.
Game over. Fuck the swiss TV people. Turkey had a free kick from 30 yards out at the end, but Metin put it over.
3-2 Germany Final
Turkey had 22 shots (15 on goal); Germany 9 (5)
Possession 63%-37%
Finally, the top quote I put up there has a bunch of resonance, doesn't it?
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Euro 2008 Liveblog: Germany v. Portugal
Would anybody have complained if Germany v. Protugal had been the final match-up?
Okay, sure the Italians. And probably even the Dutch. The Greeks, yeah they would have wanted to defend their title. And have you ever heard a Swede bitch? Oh, and I bet the Turks can whinge up a storm as well.
Okay, except for 13 of the 14 other nations involved—Austria should be blowing some deity right now in giving thanks that they got to attend this little shindig—who would have complained that this would have been worthy of the final?
And we get it as a quarter final. Good for us.
Bad for one of Germany or Portugal (I'm hoping it's bad for Portugal) as one of them is going home after today.
Not that I have any particular love for die Germans. Every couple of generations they get a little bossy and start invading neighbors; and well, by the calendar on the wall, seems like we're past due for another attempt at über alles.
But I'm sick of Cristiano Ronaldo.Time to start acting like the best player in the world instead of a 4 year old. So dear Baby Jesus, if Ronaldo takes a blatant dive today, please give the ref the strength to card his ass.
Any number of players on the pitch could be the difference maker today. I'm putting it on Jens. If he kicks one of off his own knee today (a la at home to Fulham to start the last EPL campaign) the Germans are done. And I will laugh as he shuffles off to Stuttgart.
But if his secrets on how to handle Ronaldo and the Portuguese turn out to be more than complete bullshit, then I will cry as Kilnsy's CHB could have dropped those on some teammates during the last season at the Emirates.
Anyway, by the fault of some arrogant reffing, Joachim Loew won't be on the sideline. He's got a one match ban, which means he can't have anything to do with his team from half hour before until half hour after. Really? He can't run on the field if they win to celebrate? I believe the term to describe that is: "fucking stupid."
Bummer as the movie version of this match with Hackman [warning mp3 link] matching wits against MacLachlan would have been box office gold.
Livebloggamy to follow. Join us as I go get a sandwich and will be back a couple of minutes before kick.
Germany: Lehmann, Friedrich, Mertesacker, Metzelder, Lahm, Schweinsteiger, Rolfes, Ballack, Hitzlsperger, Klose, Podolski.
Portugal: Ricardo, Bosingwa, Pepe, Carvalho, Ferreira, Petit, Joao Moutinho, Ronaldo, Deco, Simao, Nuno Gomes.
Sweet fancy Moses... No Foudy. Wow, maybe prayer does work. I don't know. I didn't try it, but I bet somebody who believes in it did.
T-minus 6: "Seven Nation Army" again. Is this now the default music for crowd chants at Euro 2008?
T-minus 5: Anthems. Germany first. And the Dodgers are pasting the Reds. Hope I didn't start Aaron Harang.
T-minus 3: Portugal's anthem. They look tiny. And Deco looks like a Care Bear.
T-miuns 2: Seriously, as they shake hands Germany looks like they are playing Lilliput.
Kick: So apparently new sod went down like 2 or 3 days ago and it's not really set. Players were puling up corners of huge pieces in pre-game. Could be an issue. But everyone thought that about the CL final and it turned out not to be, or did it? Was EBJT's kick shanked because of he slipped on loose turf, or just straight rain?
2nd minute: Germany having problems getting out of its end on consecutive throws.
3rd minute: Long ball from Germany and Ricardo ends up coming way off his line and outside the 18 to "handle" it. Has to use his feet. Podolski gets a visit from the ref as someone from Portugal cries on the ground.
4th minute: First chance from Ronaldo. He takes it down the left side and kicks one straight into Lehmann's arms. Piece of cake, but Lehmann has looked shakier on easier balls this year.
5th minute: German controlling the midfield a little better right now. But the Portuguese back line is pretty solid to this point and each of the 3-4 forays deep into Portugal territory have been turned away.
7th minute: Looks like the entire Portuguese midfield is going to sit deep to start. Great ball to Deco but his header to Nuno Gomes falls to Lehmann. Germany plays it forward, then back to maintain possession.
8th minute: Ballack fouled by Petit. Free kick for Ballack... Wastes it hitting a two man wall a good metric mile from the edge of the box. Throw for Germany.
10th minute: Exchange of possession in the midfield. Simao makes a run up the right side. Germany makes a nice tackle and couters. Long shot from Hitzlsperger goes to the side netting. Never a danger.
11th minute: And another good run from Simao deep down the right, but his cross goes right in front of Nuno Gomes who can't get his head on it.
12th minute: Metzelder catches an arm in the face. Okay not really. He fell and started going all wussy. Germans area apparenty capable of playing pansy as well. Get up.
14th minute: Klose down the left side. Might have been fouled as he cut back inside, but no whistle. The Portuguese counter, then give it back in midfield.
15th minte: Nice ball from Deco to Simao, runs just inside the line of the 18. He takes a nice shot right into Lehmann's arms again. Simao is the biggest offensive threat for either side this far.
17th minute: The Germans are doing a decent job preventing Portugal from stringing much together through the midfield, but once they get upfield, they are putting pressure on the German defense. Oddly enough, Germany has made almost zero effort to play this match in the air.
18th minute: Throw in for Germany. Schweinsteiger into the box, and it's deflected out for a German corner. Quick corner. Ballack makes run to it but his header looks more like a jump shot... And an air ball at that.
20th minute: Portugal earns a corner after a nice diagonal run through the box by Ronaldo gets cleared. Simao skies the corner. But as they play it back around... Oooh. Simao with aothher cross but Joao Moutinho couldn't make up his mind what to do with it. He first looked like he was going to dive to head it, then he pulled up and tried to get a knee on it. So it sailed wide.
22nd minute: So Portugal has blow the first quality chance of the match. But a littl.. GOAL 1-0 Germany.
I was just about to say a little more creativity from Germany. It's a nice one touch to Podolski who sends it across the box low to Schweinsteiger, who cuts nicely toward the center then buries it past Ricardo. Really, on replay that was a great feed from Podolski that hit Schweinsteiger right in stride.
23rd minute: Joao Moutinho is down, like Ribery down. Okay... restart. Joao Moutinho back up.
26th minute: Yellow for Petit. Free kick from about 30 for Germany.
GOAL 2-0 Germany.
Schweinsteiger with a great kick and Klose is totally unmarked with an easy header right in. Horrible defense by Protugal, and it wasn't just being out-heighted by 6 inches. If it wasn't Klose there was another German (Ballack?) waiting behind him to knock that in. Ricardo was helpless. And they are in serious trouble.
28th minute: Cross from Deco to the back post on the right side. Lahm clears it and Simao takes a corner.
29th minute: Corner comes into the box and hits about the 6, but there is nobody in red there and Germany clears it. Change for Portugal coming... probably Joao Moutinho out.
30th minute: Germany now moving with lots of confidence and look like they are just going to beat up the Portuguese.
31st minute: Portugal playing with good possession in Germany's third, but they aren't getting good chances out of the possession. Simao with a free kick in. Nice ball to Deco, but because Deco is a dwarf, he can't head it but instead opts for the toe punch.
32nd minunte: Oh, nice backheel from Ronaldo that finds Nuno Gomes on a give. Shot is blocked. That was pretty but it lead to nothing.
33rd minute: By the way, they have replayed the Klose goal about 7 times and Andy Gray keeps abusing Ronaldo for failing on defense so epically.
35th miunte: Nice feed from deep on the left side from Ronaldo to Nuno Gones. He can't get it under control at the edge of the six, so instead he takes a dive. No whistle. Good on the ref. Germany counters. Whistle, but not sure what for. Offsides?
37th minute: Ronaldo gets them a corner, but Lehmann makes a decisive move to grab a strong shot. It's odd, when Germany counters there are 5-6 red shirts already back to shut it down. When Portugal makes a break there are sometimes only 3 Germans at the back.
38th minute: German fans refuse to stop chanting "Seven Nation Army." This might cause me to stop cheering for them. Oof... Ballack took one in the face. And that looked legit. But I'd be wrong. On replay that was a bit of a nance move by Ballack to fall. Seriously, Germans are being bigger pussies that the Portuguese.
40th minute: Portugal give it up at midfield. Throw in for Germany. They swing it wide to the right but Schweinsteiger gives it up... GOAL 2-1. Game back on.
Off a quick counter, Ronaldo takes a shot from the right and Lehmann makes a good save, but the rebound comes out to the feet of Nuno Gomes, and he buries it as Lehmann is out of position and Mertesacker can't get a foot on it to deflect it wide [Halftime correction: He did get a toe on it, but only enough to deflect it where it was already headed, in the back of the net]. Bit of an unlucky bounce off of a good save by Lehmann, but we've got a game again.
43rd minute: Now Germany looks the less confident side. They work it through midfield but Schweinsteiger with a mishandle at the endge of the 18. Might have been a handball from Portugal. The red on the counter and a selfish and poor shot from Ronaldo stops the threat. Really, that was stupid of him as he had other options on either side.
45th minute: Throw in for Germany deep in Portugal's third. Lahm with a feed to Ballack, oh, and just missed the near post. Ricardo with a nice save. Andy Gray pointing out the wide open Klose on the far post.
+:30: And on the other end, Ronaldo with a dangerous shot low from the left side. He had Lehmann beat, but it went just beyond the far post. That was close to leveling. End-to-end.
+1:30: Whistle.
Half Good stuff there right before the whistle as both teams had chances. Portugal's was better but Ronaldo couldn't put it away. To be fair it was great work to make that shot come withihn a foot of the far post.
When was the last time anyone used the phrase "hum dinger"? That's probably what we have on tap here in the second half. Portugal knows they need a goal, so sooner or later they will have to press. Germany has looked okay countering at times, but once they were up 2-0 they went, understandably, tentative. Teams are back on the field and we're moments from re-start.
Second Half
Kick: And we're off again. Dig the cross on Portugal's socks. Hadn't noticed that before.
46th minute: Meireles on for Portugal by the way.
47th minute: Germany with a bad giveaway at midfied. Ronaldo goes streaking down the left side and on a slight touch he goes down and starts crying like the biggest douche in the world. He draws a card for Friedrich because of it. Stupid ref, that's the wrong decision. YOU'RE ONLY ENCOURAING IT
49th minute: And now a yellow for Lahm. Yep, that was justified. Simao took him down (and that could have been a foul) but when Lahm rolled over he followed trough with his legs to hit Simao.
50th minute: Then on the restart Simao takes down Podolski and gets away with it. Getting chippy out there kids. BAcking up the card on Friedrich, he stepped on Ronaldo as he was walking away. So maybe it did hurt and was worth a card. Still, C. Ronaldo is a disgrace to y chromosomes everywhere.
52nd minute: Sloppy giveaway from Germany almost gifts Portugal a great chance but the flag was up.
54th minute: Boswinga with a run up the right and crosses it into Ronaldo who goes down and is clutching his ear. I bet he's hurt himself exhaling before.
55th minute: Long ball from Simao completely across the box to a nice large patch of unoccupied green grass, which lovingly accepted it. A turnover almost results in a break for Germany as the ball bounced in to space and Ballack almost raced to collect it.
56th minute: Low, bending cross from Ronaldo into the box. Could have been tricky, but Lehmann handles it. Pretty ball, just a bit short of anyone in red. Corner for Portugal.
57th minute: Argh... Pepe skies one over the bar. It went off Deco who flicked it back with his head right to Pepe who had an open goal in front of him, but he decided "Hey, watch me send this ball 90 degrees straight up."
58th minute: Schweinsteiger wants a call on the touch line. Doesn't get it. He should have. Portugal counters and a long kick from Ronaldo is blocked before it gets to the box. Now a corner for Portugal.
59th minute: Ball comes to the same spot as the last corner. Sorry, lightning only strikes once. Ball comes out, Germany counters. And Pepe is given a yellow for a professional foul on Klose. Actually, he just stood him up and knocked him down. I'm kind of with Andy Gray that the ref seems to be favoring Portugal on inconsistent calls.
62nd minute: GOAL 3-1 (Oops)
Bit of a replay of the second goal headed in for Germany, only this time it's Ballack. Schweinsteiger with a long free kick to the edge of the 6. The Germans just have more height, and they get past the last defenders. Shit read by Ricardo to boot. So, seeing how you can't coach "tall" I don't see how Portugal solves this one.
64th minute: Meireles with a shot from long. Deflected to Ballack who is promptly fouled by... Meireles! He could have gotten a card for that, or for the protesting, but nope.
65th minute: On the exchange of long balls, Lehmann collects and gets it upfield where German gets a throw in. Nani up and getting ready to come it. Andy Gray said he'd take Simao off as he's done nothing. Reall? Simao helped create the first 2-3 good chances for Portugal.
67th minuteL Nuno Gomes is off. Nani on. And Dave Bush apparently has a no-hitter through 7 for the Brewers.
68th minute: Deco earns a free kick for Portugal at the top left from about 25. He sends it straight to about the 4th row of the stands. Nice.
69th minute: Nani cuts right across the top of the 18 and through about 5 Germans, but he is moving too fast for his own good and loses control.
70th minute: And Lahm with a nice shot. Looked like he had lost it in traffic but he keeps it on his foot and gets a strong shot from the top left of the 18 and it goes a bit wide. A good bit, but enough to make Ricardo move. Ricardo sucks by the way.
71st minute: Some one touch passing on the other end tees one up for Petit, who puts it right in the hole. "Hole" being Lehmann's arms, not the back of the net. Midfield is WIDE open now as Portugal is pushing forward. Looks like a change for each team coming up.
73rd minute: Nani collets one on the right side and gets in deep, but there are two white shirts waiting to clear any cross and they do. Corner for Portugal though. Postiga on. Petit off. Also a change for Germany. Give me a sec...
75th minute: Simao up the center. To Nani, and he puts up into a low orbit. Terrible. Hot tip if you are Portugal: Make Jens handle the ball. Take something off it if you have to. It's no coincidence your goal came from a rebound.
76th minute: Commentators are talking about Portugal's failures. If Spain win this, their Iberian counterparts are going to take the mantle of underachiever-chokers, aren't they?
77th minute: Germany has finally packed it all back. Portugal sending balls into the box and they emerge headed back toward midfield. Lather, rinse, repeat.
78th minute: Lehmann launches one about 85% of the way up the pitch. Portugal Noonan's it and it's a corner for Germany. Terrible corner from Schweinsteiger but it rolls out to Podolski who sends a rocket toward the basket that goes wide.
80th minute: And I don't think Portugal has any Turkey in them. This match is over. Corner here for Germany. Nobody on Portugal has grown in the last 20 have they? Another weak ball from Schweinsteiger gives Portugal a counter.
81st minute: I think Simao just made Scolari want to quit football with that last shot. From long, it went high and Portugal wasted a man advantage.
82nd minute: Shot from Ronaldo at the top of the box is blocked and the bounce comes toward Simao who is too short to get a head to it. That sequence pretty much summed up Portugal's day. Thanks for playing guys. Ronaldo, your tranny hooker awaits.
84th minute: So does C. Ronaldo break into tears before the final whistle or after? That's about the only uncertainty left in this match. Germany threatens but a nice close out by Deco who turns it back upfield.
85th minute: Cheeky little lofter into the box by Deco. Lehmann grabs it and Postiga takes him out. Only two players for Portugal were offside, yet the flag stayed down. Lehmann is getting actual attention. Ronaldo is jawing with the ref about something. Sand in the vag? Who knows? I can't lip read, much less lip read Portuguese.
Oh my... 3-2 Beauty cross from Nani. From the left side at about 30, he curled it right on Postiga's head. And he buried past Lehmann who had zero chance. Postiga did a nice job getting behind the defense. That was pretty sweet. And right as I was about to say the scorline would be the same as the WC 3rd place game.
89th minute: Germany doing a bad job killing time. And a nervous ball. But Postiga with a foul to get Germany off the hook.
90th minute: Four minutes of stoppage. Germany gets deep and the cross is blocked. Looked like it should have been a corner. Instead it's Portugal with more pressure and some nice one-touch passing. They get a corss in deep from Nani and from the back post it's headed back to the 6. Germany clears.
91st minute: But only for a second as the ball comes back to Potugal and Postiga sends a shot over the cross bar.
93rd minute: And another great cross from Nani. Portugal not going away. It comes back out and Nani collects it again, and another great cross, but Postiga is whistled for a foul. Lehmann with a long GK. Final minute here.
94th minute: Final seconds. A long pass to Ronaldo who gets it and sends it back to the middle of the box. Nobody there. It ends up downfield where Podolski gets in. He takes a shot that Ricardo collects.
Whistle.
Whoa... Neverous moments there from Germany and Big Phil is going to kick himself for not getting Nani in the game early as he had about 5 seeing eye crosses late in the match that all could have been trouble. But Germany gets the win and moves on to the semis. Thanks for playing Portugal. Really, they made a game out of it late when it seemed all but done.
See everyone back here tomorrow for Turkey (UF's adopted team) and Croatia.
Night folks.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
The Good, The Bad, The WTF: Euro 2008 Edition
This post, my friends is going to be a mess. As long as you know that going in, we'll all be okay. Inside, we will break down each competing country's home and away jersey and file it into the categories Good, Bad and WTF. Pretty simple, huh?
For ease of my poorly HTMLing soul, I will only provide links to each shirt instead of trying to force them all into the Blogger template. Trust me, if you've seen how Blogger can mangle posts by screwing up pictures, this is a good thing.
Onwards and upwards, my friends. Here we go.
Group A
Switzerland Home Away Switzerland wear Puma jerseys. In what will quickly become a theme in this post, Puma jerseys all look cookie-cutter. They have a template, switch colors where necessary, and affix the necessary badges. Boring. What I like about the Swiss shirt is the badge. That kind of artsy rendering of their national association where they also fit in the white cross. However, these are Puma jerseys, so the verdict is:
Home and Away: Bad
Czech Republic Home Away Plain. Boring. Go home. I do like the blue piping on the home shirt, and the Czech badge is one of the more interesting entries, full of history, for those into that. But it is simply not enough to overcome the crappiness of being a Puma shirt.
Home and Away: Bad
Portugal Home Away There is something wrong with the Portugal home shirt. We here at UF could not quite put our finger on it, but we hate it. It could be the wrong hue, or it could just be the too tight fit. We hated it all the same. On the other hand, we were much more sympathetic to the white shirt. It looks a lot better, but, in the end, we found it a little plain.
Home and Away: Bad
Turkey Home Away Now we're talking. It may still be a hangover from their unbelievable victory over the Czechs on Sunday, but these are both very nice shirts. The home shirt can look a little like a 'Boro effort, I'm sure, but it dazzles nonetheless. And that away shirt, my goodness. Two teams made solid use of baby blue accents this tournament, and Turkey is one of them.
Home and Away: Good
Group B
Austria Home Away A mixed bag. Once again, we are stuck with Puma templates, but Austria does something a little right here. It's not in the home shirt, really, though it should rate a "meh" instead of its final grade. The winner here is the away shirt. Menacingly black with a little flag flair thrown in at the collar.
Home: Bad; Away: Good
Croatia Home Away Did we even get to see the all-checkerboard shirt yet? I don't recall. You have to give them respect for sticking with such and irritating-to-the-eyes shirt for all of these years. As for the blue away shirt, man, I don't know. And for that, it perfectly fits the WTF category. Safe to say I would not want to sport either one of these walking around my town.
Home and Away: WTF?
Germany Home Away Poor Germany. Forever saddled with a white shirt that they are not entirely happy with, so they fuck around with it. This year's entry feels unbalanced. Too much black in the striping, not enough red or yellow. At least it keeps us away from the away shirt. Seriously, this is not a look for top tier international football. This is a training top. Even though I kind of like the gold stitching on the black background, I hope they never have to wear it.
Home: Bad; Away: WTF?
Poland Home Away Poland, the home of unattractive football. They never looked good playing in the Euros, and these shirts did not help. Blandest of them all.
Home and Away: Bad
Group C
Romania Home Away Romania's shirts this year felt like a throwback to USA '94. Sadly, the team did not perform in the same manner. The worst part of it all is that they totally rip off the New York Cosmos badge. Anyway, 14 years is too soon to do a throwback jersey. Well, I write that, but I can't hate on the home jersey. I like it.
Home: Good; Away: Bad
France Home Away I am not a fan of the extra crap going across the middle of the French home shirt. They do, however, get credit with me by having their flag pop up inside the adidas stripes on the arms. Throw in that nice, newish badge of the rooster and you have a winner. God help me, I like the garish red away shirt as well. Two winners.
Home and Away: Good
Netherlands Home Away The Dutch are always hard to figure out. They have to use that bright orange which pays homage to a royal family line that no one likes. Sometimes they pull it off, and sometimes it is painful. This tournament, they pulled it off, sometimes. The Dutch were the second team to tastefully use Nike's new baby blue accent by pairing the orange shirt with baby blue socks. And it totally worked. However, when they reverted to orange socks yesterday, it all looked horrible. Also, nice try, but you can't work in your flag on the collar without it looking like you won First Grade attendance medals. As for the away shirt, it divides us. But, I'm the one writing here, and I hate it. So, there you go. We do seem to be unified in liking the cyborg numbering though.
Home: Good, with qualifications; Away: WTF?
Italy Home Away Italy stick with the basics. Once again, this is a Puma top, but it's not quite as bad as the red and white ones. This gets a passing grade for the gold at the neck. The away jersey, though, is run of the mill and boring.
Home: Good; Away: Bad
Group D
Spain Home Away I think we were a bit undecided by these. The home jersey is nothing out of the ordinary, but it works well. That light gold away shirt, though, is rather atrocious. Hopefully, Spain will not be required to trot it out on their way to winning this year's tournament.
Home: Good; Away: WTF?
Russia Home Away These had potential, especially the away shirt, but the execution is off. I am all for integrating you nation's flag into the shirt. I don't like it when doing so means that I have to fill in the blanks for you. The white shirt loses the top stripe of the flag and the red shirt loses the bottom stripe of the flag. Why not go with a blue away shirt so that one can easily make out the flag running across the torso? Nike FAIL.
Home: Bad; Away: WTF?
Greece Home Away Thanks for coming and bringing the same kit from 2004. Did you think that would work? Okay, the sublimated flag print on the away shirt is nice, but no dice.
Home and Away: Bad
Sweden Home Away It's always tough to deal with the Swedish shirts. The combo of yellow and blue is a nice one, but they just use too much yellow sometimes. If only I could get a reason to really like a bunch of yellow Swedish shirts. Oh, here's one. The away shirt is a tough one. In some pictures, it looks black, which would be a bold move, but in others it looks navy, which is kind of boring. Still, since Swedish girls will wear them and get pictured in them, they are both winners.
Home and Away: Good
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