Apparently, it's not difficult. And no, it has nothing to do with wearing AEK Athens colors in Olympiakos territory, either.
No, this is a spin-off of the classic tale "Boys Behaving Badly on Holiday", although when you see all the pictures, you might wonder what all the fuss what about.
A group of 17 current and former players for Hanham Athletic and Hanham's Sunday League team went on holiday to the island of Crete, and as is customary with team vacations, they brought some dress-up gear to be worn humiliatingly around town while hopping from watering hole to watering hole.
Long story short, they were arrested, but not for being drunk and disorderly...the locals have decided enough is enough, however, and the footballers were arrested and accused of causing offence to the Catholic Church with their outfits.
Good way to kick off your holiday, isn't it?
The group were released by the judge once the case was brought to court, but not before they spent some time getting acquainted with the local, ahem, facilities:(Club Secretary Mick) Underhill, 59, said he and his team-mates, aged 18 to 65, were marched into a courtroom in the Crete capital of Heraklion yesterday morning still dressed in the risque garb after spending 40 grueling hours in a 'cramped' and 'disgusting' prison cell.
Can't be much worse than the toilets at Southend, can it?
Speaking from a bar in Malia, now a free man, Mr Underhill said: 'The last 48 hours have just been unbelievable. It's no doubt something we will never forget.
'The prison facilities were horrendous. You wouldn't let the dog use the toilets in there. There was graffiti all over the walls. We were all squeezed into one cell with eight concrete beds - and we had to buy food if we wanted to eat.'
So, lesson learned. Don't stuff your 65-year-old body into a spandex nun's costume on one of the largest Greek islands. It's still better than what they do at Manchester United holiday parties.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
How to get in trouble in Greece
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
UF Quick Throw: Laser Beams!
Fresh off the wires: FIFA says it has opened disciplinary proceedings against Greece over alleged use of lasers by fans in World Cup Qualifier. Bad enough that the Greeks have to subject the world to their negative tactics, but now this??
Update: Here is the full story.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
The Good, The Bad, The WTF: Euro 2008 Edition
This post, my friends is going to be a mess. As long as you know that going in, we'll all be okay. Inside, we will break down each competing country's home and away jersey and file it into the categories Good, Bad and WTF. Pretty simple, huh?
For ease of my poorly HTMLing soul, I will only provide links to each shirt instead of trying to force them all into the Blogger template. Trust me, if you've seen how Blogger can mangle posts by screwing up pictures, this is a good thing.
Onwards and upwards, my friends. Here we go.
Group A
Switzerland Home Away Switzerland wear Puma jerseys. In what will quickly become a theme in this post, Puma jerseys all look cookie-cutter. They have a template, switch colors where necessary, and affix the necessary badges. Boring. What I like about the Swiss shirt is the badge. That kind of artsy rendering of their national association where they also fit in the white cross. However, these are Puma jerseys, so the verdict is:
Home and Away: Bad
Czech Republic Home Away Plain. Boring. Go home. I do like the blue piping on the home shirt, and the Czech badge is one of the more interesting entries, full of history, for those into that. But it is simply not enough to overcome the crappiness of being a Puma shirt.
Home and Away: Bad
Portugal Home Away There is something wrong with the Portugal home shirt. We here at UF could not quite put our finger on it, but we hate it. It could be the wrong hue, or it could just be the too tight fit. We hated it all the same. On the other hand, we were much more sympathetic to the white shirt. It looks a lot better, but, in the end, we found it a little plain.
Home and Away: Bad
Turkey Home Away Now we're talking. It may still be a hangover from their unbelievable victory over the Czechs on Sunday, but these are both very nice shirts. The home shirt can look a little like a 'Boro effort, I'm sure, but it dazzles nonetheless. And that away shirt, my goodness. Two teams made solid use of baby blue accents this tournament, and Turkey is one of them.
Home and Away: Good
Group B
Austria Home Away A mixed bag. Once again, we are stuck with Puma templates, but Austria does something a little right here. It's not in the home shirt, really, though it should rate a "meh" instead of its final grade. The winner here is the away shirt. Menacingly black with a little flag flair thrown in at the collar.
Home: Bad; Away: Good
Croatia Home Away Did we even get to see the all-checkerboard shirt yet? I don't recall. You have to give them respect for sticking with such and irritating-to-the-eyes shirt for all of these years. As for the blue away shirt, man, I don't know. And for that, it perfectly fits the WTF category. Safe to say I would not want to sport either one of these walking around my town.
Home and Away: WTF?
Germany Home Away Poor Germany. Forever saddled with a white shirt that they are not entirely happy with, so they fuck around with it. This year's entry feels unbalanced. Too much black in the striping, not enough red or yellow. At least it keeps us away from the away shirt. Seriously, this is not a look for top tier international football. This is a training top. Even though I kind of like the gold stitching on the black background, I hope they never have to wear it.
Home: Bad; Away: WTF?
Poland Home Away Poland, the home of unattractive football. They never looked good playing in the Euros, and these shirts did not help. Blandest of them all.
Home and Away: Bad
Group C
Romania Home Away Romania's shirts this year felt like a throwback to USA '94. Sadly, the team did not perform in the same manner. The worst part of it all is that they totally rip off the New York Cosmos badge. Anyway, 14 years is too soon to do a throwback jersey. Well, I write that, but I can't hate on the home jersey. I like it.
Home: Good; Away: Bad
France Home Away I am not a fan of the extra crap going across the middle of the French home shirt. They do, however, get credit with me by having their flag pop up inside the adidas stripes on the arms. Throw in that nice, newish badge of the rooster and you have a winner. God help me, I like the garish red away shirt as well. Two winners.
Home and Away: Good
Netherlands Home Away The Dutch are always hard to figure out. They have to use that bright orange which pays homage to a royal family line that no one likes. Sometimes they pull it off, and sometimes it is painful. This tournament, they pulled it off, sometimes. The Dutch were the second team to tastefully use Nike's new baby blue accent by pairing the orange shirt with baby blue socks. And it totally worked. However, when they reverted to orange socks yesterday, it all looked horrible. Also, nice try, but you can't work in your flag on the collar without it looking like you won First Grade attendance medals. As for the away shirt, it divides us. But, I'm the one writing here, and I hate it. So, there you go. We do seem to be unified in liking the cyborg numbering though.
Home: Good, with qualifications; Away: WTF?
Italy Home Away Italy stick with the basics. Once again, this is a Puma top, but it's not quite as bad as the red and white ones. This gets a passing grade for the gold at the neck. The away jersey, though, is run of the mill and boring.
Home: Good; Away: Bad
Group D
Spain Home Away I think we were a bit undecided by these. The home jersey is nothing out of the ordinary, but it works well. That light gold away shirt, though, is rather atrocious. Hopefully, Spain will not be required to trot it out on their way to winning this year's tournament.
Home: Good; Away: WTF?
Russia Home Away These had potential, especially the away shirt, but the execution is off. I am all for integrating you nation's flag into the shirt. I don't like it when doing so means that I have to fill in the blanks for you. The white shirt loses the top stripe of the flag and the red shirt loses the bottom stripe of the flag. Why not go with a blue away shirt so that one can easily make out the flag running across the torso? Nike FAIL.
Home: Bad; Away: WTF?
Greece Home Away Thanks for coming and bringing the same kit from 2004. Did you think that would work? Okay, the sublimated flag print on the away shirt is nice, but no dice.
Home and Away: Bad
Sweden Home Away It's always tough to deal with the Swedish shirts. The combo of yellow and blue is a nice one, but they just use too much yellow sometimes. If only I could get a reason to really like a bunch of yellow Swedish shirts. Oh, here's one. The away shirt is a tough one. In some pictures, it looks black, which would be a bold move, but in others it looks navy, which is kind of boring. Still, since Swedish girls will wear them and get pictured in them, they are both winners.
Home and Away: Good
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Euro 2008 Liveblog: Greece v. Russia
Grecian model Aleka Kamila: May or may not be wearing panties.
Russian model Natalia Vodianova: Looks angry.
Once again, join me after the jump for the liveblog.
The Greece starting XI for coach Otto Rehhagel:
GK - Nikopolidis
DEF - Seitaridis (2); Patsatzoglou (3); Dellas (5); Torosidis (15); Kyrgiakos (16)
MID - Basinas (6)(C); Katsouranis (21)
ST - Charisteas (9); Amanatidis (20); Liberopoulos (23)
The Russian starting XI for coach Guus Hiddink:
GK - Akinfeev
DEF - Ignashevich (4); Kolodin (8); Anyukov (22)
MID - Torbinski (8); Semak (11); Bilyaletdinov (15); Zyryanov (17); Zhirkov (18); Semshov (20)
ST - Pavlyuchenko (19)
This match is being played at EM Stadion Wals-Siezenheim (Bless You!) in Salzburg. The officiating crew is:
Centre official: Roberto Rosetti (ITA)
Assistant referees: Allesandro Griselli (ITA); Paolo Calcagno (ITA)
4th official: Olegario Benquerenca (POR)
Programming note: Due to the fact that the Greeks and the Russians all have crazy names, I will most likely be referring to kit numbers (rather than names) during the action. If you don't like it, kiss my arse.
Last time out, Russia lost 4-1 to Spain thanks to the magic boot of David Villa, while Greece lost 2-0 to Sweden. Given the result of today's earlier match, a win for either side here ties them for second place on 3 points.
Programming note: If this game is a nil-nil snoozer at half-time, this liveblog will be handed over to Precious Roy for some interesting notes on product development and management. You've been warned.
00:01 - And we're off!
00:02 - Anyone bored yet? Assholes. Sure, I get the crappy game - I blame The Fan's Attic, Freemasons, and the Pentaverate.
00:30 - Poor touch from the Russians leads to an early chance for Greece, but Akinfeev is out quickly.
01:30 - Free kick for the Russians after Zhirkov is taken down by Dellas. The result is a ball played in and cleared by the Greeks.
02:42 - Nikolopidis stops using his Grecian Hair Formula for Men long enough to pick up a weak shot from the Russians. His hair stays gray.
03:50 - Sloppy play at the back from the Greeks, but they eventually clear the ball. This game is a volleyball match so far, with play taking place in the middle third of the pitch.
05:50 - Amanatidis gets a boot to the head, and the resulting free kick gets played wide to Torosidis, whose shot is directly at Akinfeev.
07:40 - Long ball over the top for the Greeks, and Akinfeev doesn't come out for it, forcing his defender to play it out for a throw-in. The throw comes in and Semak attempts a bicycle kick to clear. Liberopoulos is unfairly called for fouling Semak and the Russians clear it.
10:45 - Shot from Bilyaletdinov, but it goes high over the bar.
12:11 - After 30 seconds of more volleyball, the ball is sent over the touchline. This is truly ugly footy.
12:58 - Seitaridis gets beautiful through-ball to the corner, but his attempted cross falls right into the hands of Akinfeev. The Russians respond by building through the midfield, resulting in a shot from Pavlyuchenko and a good save from Nikopolidis.
14:00 - The corner kick comes in and Zhirkov gets off a nice half-volley that curls wide left.
15:45 - Liberopoulos goes down in the box after a tug on the shirt, but nothing is given. The ball comes down the other hand and the Russian shot caroms off Dellas, but the linesman had already called for offsides.
17:47 - The ball is played through to Zhirkov, who taps it back to Torbinski but Basinas plays it out for the Greeks.
19:40 - Free kick for the Greeks from 35 yards out, and the ball is played into the box. Charisteas is right there but fails to put it in the net. The second corner comes back out to near midfield and is eventually played out for a Russian throw.
22:50 - A long ball to Charisteas is played to Patsatzoglou, who turns it back to Charisteas. A poor shot results, going over the bar.
25:10 - The Greeks are definitely getting the better of the ball possession at this point, playing passes mostly through the middle with occasional forays into the box.
They just showed a Greek fan wearing a sleeveless denim jacket. This may explain much about the state of their country.
29:20 - A dangerous ball in from Zhirkov comes back out to the Russians at the 18, but the ensuing shot is directly at Nikopolidis.
30:10 - A long-range shot from Patsatzoglou is directly Akinfeev. Neither keeper has had too much work so far.
32:40 - GOAL! Russia 1 - Greece 0. A ridiculous mistake from Nikopolidis. The Russians play the ball around the left end of the pitch, eventually sending a ball over the keeper's head toward the endline. Nikopolidis comes out too far to get it and Semak keeps the ball in bounds, sending it back towards the middle to be slotted home into the open net by Zyryanov.
34:00 - Russian send forward another attack and should have a second goal, but it bounces down and then up over the bar.
36:00 - After a quick save by Akinfeev, the Russians attack again, winning a corner. The ball is played in to the 6 and flies across the middle of the pitch for a second corner.
37:25 - The ball from the second corner is played out to midfield by the Greeks, but the Russians send it right back in. After some play around 20 yards, they get off a shot that rises above the bar.
39:00 - Seitaridis off, Karagounis (#10) on for Greece.
41:00 - Free kick for Greece after Semak dispossesses Karagounis. Absolutely no foul there, but the resulting ball is played in directly to the Russian defense. Ball don't lie.
41:51 - Yellow card for Karagounis for his tackel on Semshov. That's some karma. The free kick for the Russians is played in to the middle to build, but the ball goes out for a Greek throw-in.
42:50 - Free kick for the Greeks as Torbinski slides into Charisteas. The ball is played up the side, and eventually out by the Russians for a throw-in. The ball comes in to the box and Liberopoulos attempts a bicycle, which winds up in a corner.
44:19 - The Greek corner is played in to the box and comes back out to Karagounis. The ball played back in is null and void, as there was a Greek player offside.
45:00 (+01:05) - HALF-TIME.
Despite the bulk of the possession, the Greeks find themselves down 1-0 to the Russians thanks to some shambolic goal-keeping.
45:00 - And the Greeks have 45 minutes left to defend their crown.
45:30 - Off a free kick, Karagounis plays the ball through to Charisteas. DEspite being wide open, he turns and puts it directly at Akinfeev.
46:10 - The Russians come down to the other hand and Pavlyuchenko strikes a ball on the ground that Nikopolidis gobbles up.
47:00 - While a Greek defender is on the ground, writhing in agony, Pavlyuchenko strikes a ball from a difficult angle at Nikopolidis. The corner comes in and bounces off a Greek defender. The second corner is headed over the bar.
48:53 - Free kick for Greece as Karagounis is fouled by Zyryanov. The ball is played in from 35 yards by Basinas, but Amanatidis is unable to get a foot on it.
51:00 - Long ball through to a Greek forward, but he was offside and came back for it. The ARs have done a good job on offsides calls in this game.
51:58 - Pavlyuchenko makes a nice run, but strikes a shot just wide of the Greek goal rather than passing.
52:30 - The Greeks respond with a run from Karagounis, forcing Akinfeev into a nice save. The ball comes back and results in another save for a corner. The ball comes out to Karagounis, but the Greeks get shite out of it.
54:30 - The Greeks put some pressure in the 6-yard box, but Basinas puts it over the bar.
55:40 - Free kick for the Russians as Torobinski was fouled. The ball is played short and winds up in the box, where Bilyaletdinov goes down like he'd been shot by Karagounis. Nothing doing, and the Greeks play it out.
56:40 - The Russians pressure again, and Pavlyuchenko lays it off for Bilyaletdinov, who puts it just wide.
57:20 - Yellow card for Liberopoulos for dissent after a foul was called against him.
59:50 - Liberopoulos off, Gekas (#17) on for Greece.
60:30 - Pavlyuchenko makes a nice run, but fails to pass the ball off to the right to Zyryanov, who was wide open.
61:24 - Corner kick from the Russians goes directly to the defense, and the Greeks play it out.
62:40 - The Greeks get away with one. The ball is played in by Anyukov, and is pushed out by Nikopolidis. The Greeks fail to deal with it, and Bilyatedinov takes a shot that goes off a defender. The resulting corner yields nothing.
66:17 - The whistles from the crowd are getting louder, as the Greeks spend 3 minutes moving the ball with no positive result.
67:20 - A long ball in from Patsatzoglou results in a punch out from Akinfeev, leading to a corner. The ball is played in and headed down by Charisteas, but Akinfeev takes it.
69:00 - Bilyaletdinov off, Saenko (#9) on for Russia.
70:30 - A long ball through for Charisteas is laid off for Gekas. The ball is cleared, but only to Karagounis, who strikes a shot just left of the post.
72:02 - A long ball for the Russians is played to Pavlyuchenko, who takes a shot from 40 yards out which rises above the bar.
73:30 - After a nice spell of passing, the Russians play it over the touchline as Zhirkov is down injured after Dellas gave him a bit of the business.
75:00 - Free kick for the Russians as Basinas takes down Zyryanov at 20 yards. Looked like a legitimate tackle, but the foul is awarded. The resulting ball is shot directly into the wall.
76:17 - Yellow card for Saenko after an American football tackle on Karagounis after the ball came off the Greek defenders.
78:27 - Free kick for Greece is KAragounis is victimized yet again. Before the kick is taken, it's Stelios (#8) on for Amanatidis for Greece. The ball from the free kick is played into the 6-yard box, but cleared by Pavlyuchenko. The resulting throw-in for Greece leads to another Greek corner.
80:14 - The Greek corner is taken by Basinas, but Kyrgiakos heads it directly to Akinfeev.
81:25 - Corner for Russia, and the ball is played out to the 18 and back into the corner. Russia eventually wins a free kick after Karagounis fouls a Russian midfielder.
82:30 - The free kick from 20 yards is a shot, but it curls over the bar.
83:30 - Yellow card to Torbinski for time-wasting on the Russian throw-in.
85:10 - The Russians come up on the break but Kolodin is unable to make the pass, and the ball goes out for a Russian throw-in.
86:00 - Greece gets an opportunity and the ball makes it into the goal, but Gekas is ruled offsides in a very close call.
86:46 - Zhirkov off, Berezutski (#2) on for Russia.
87:33 - Foul as Torosidis teabags a Russian. The ball eventually results in a corner, where the ball is played around the box in a bit of time-wasting.
90:00 (+01:45) - LAst big push for the Greeks, but Kyrgiakos puts the ball over the bar.
90:00 (+01:39) - The Russians counter-attack, but Pavlyuchenko takes a shot in a 5-on-2 situation and it goes way over the bar.
90:00 (+02:13) - The Greeks attack again, but Gekas is caught offsides.
90:00 (+03:01) - FULL TIME. Russia 1 - Greece 0, and the defending champions are eliminated. The Russians still have it all to play for in their match against Sweden.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Euro 2008 Open Thread: Sweden v. Greece
Greece opens the defense of its 2004 Euro Championship against Sweden. Unfortunately, Greece will not have the element of surprise in its favor. Teams will not underestimate them. Fortunately, they face Sweden, a team lacking in offensive creativity. For sure, the Swedes are well organized and industrious, but verve fails them. That is not to say they aren't quality, they just aren't Spain, Germany or Holland.
Inter striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic leads the Swedes and is a world-class striker but may suffer without support. I don't know a damn thing about Greece, other than they play a stifling, defensive game. So, this could be a snoozer of a match. I say 1-0 Sweden.
Lineups after the jump.
Greece
Nikopolidis, Seitaridis, Kyrgiakos, Antzas, Dellas, Torosidis, Basinas, Katsouranis, Karagounis, Charisteas, Gekas.
Sweden
Isaksson; Alexandersson, Mellberg, Hansson, Nilsson, Wilhelmsson, Svensson, Andersson, Ljungberg, Ibrahimovic, H Larsson.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Euro 2008 Team Profiles: Greece
Here at UF we decided to get a jump on things a little earlier than most and preview the upcoming Euro 2008 competition. Although we each had favorite teams that we wanted to cover, there were some teams left over. Greece is one of those teams. There is nothing wrong with "The Pirate Ship" (seriously, that's their nickname), but they are a little bland. Besides, do you know how much time I spent making sure I spelled all these names correctly?
Greece enters Euro 2008 as the defending champion, after having defeated Portugal 2-1 (in Portugal!) in the Euro 2004 championship match. This is not necessarily good news, as no country has ever successfully defended the European Championship title. Greece started out well during qualifying for Euro 2008, winning their first 3 games, and their success continued throughout their remaining games, resulting in the team finishing with 31 points (the most of any team in qualifying).
They have been placed in Group D for the Euro 2008 finals with Sweden (game on 6/10), Russia (6/14), and Spain (6/18). Although a somewhat formidable draw, coach Otto Rehhagel (the national team's longest-serving coach) is confident in his team:
GK: Kostas Chalkias; Antonis Nikopolidis
DEF: Paraskevas Antzas; Traianos Dellas; Giannis Goumas; Michalis Kapsis; Sotirios Kyrgiakos; Christos Patsatzoglou; Giourkas Seitaridis; Nikos Spyropoulos; Vassilis Torosidis; Loukas Vyntra
MID: Angelos Basinas; Stelios Giannakopoulos; Giorgos Karagounis; Kostas Katsouranis; Alexis Tziolis; Ioannis Amanatidis
ST: Angelos Charisteas; Theofanis Gekas; Nikos Liberopoulos; Vangelis Mantzios; Dimitrios Salpigidis; Georgios Samaras
In general, captain Angelos Basinas (MID) is considered to be Greece's most important player, but the breakout star of Euro 2008 may be Sotirios Kyrgiakos (DEF). Hungry for national team play after missing Euro 2004 due to injuries, Kyrgiakos scored 3 goals in 12 qualifying matches.
Now, the important questions:
(1) Could England (wot, wot? They're not in Euro 2008?) beat this team? Yes, England could beat this team, and rather easily. The last three times that Greece and England have faced off in international competition have resulted in England 2 - Greece 2 and England 2 - Greece 0 (in 2001 qualifying matches for the 2002 World Cup), and England 4 - Greece 0 (international friendly). Don't be confused by the fact that Greece has a FIFA ranking of 8th, while England has a ranking of 11.
(2) Can Greece win Euro 2008? Well, theoretically, they could, but they won't. Ladbrokes currently has them as 25-1 underdogs to win.
(3) What is their pre-made excuse for not winning Euro 2008? Can't you people read - I mentioned up top that no one has ever successfully defended the European Championship football title. Surely Greece can't be expected to do what has never been done before!
(4) What is the biggest question mark surrounding their team? The question here is really one of talent. The overwhelming majority of the Greece national team players ply their trade in the Greek leagues, with only 1 in the EPL (suck it, Barclay's!) at Bolton, 2 in Portugal, and 4 in the German Bundeliga. Can a team comprised almost exclusively of players with minimal international football exposure compete on the grand European stage?
(5) Who is their worst player? I literally have no idea, since I have never heard of 99.62% of these guys.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Greek rivalries turn deadly
In the summer of 2006, I went on a Mediterranean cruise with my family. When we got to Greece, we were in the port of Piraeus, the closest port to Athens. We planned to do the touristy things and climb to the top of the Parthenon, believing we would see more of the city than if we took a bus straight up there. I wore my trusty Charleston Battery shirt, figuring no-one else would be wearing one.
This is the shirt and no, that's not me modeling it.
We walked from the cruise ship to a bus stop, and took a bus into the center of Piraeus. While we were hunting down the train station, I noticed that I was getting a lot of attention paid to me. I was getting jostled right and left, and just generally felt uncomfortable. It came to a head when my wife and I were crossing a street at a crosswalk. A guy, about 40 years old, looking bedraggled and visibly missing teeth, stared me down from across the way. As we crossed, he moved right at me, never blinking. I kept my eye on him and followed his movements until he got right up in front of me. He looked closely at the badge on the shirt, relaxed and kept walking.
I had inadvertently worn the wrong colors in the wrong town. Piraeus is the home of Olympiakos Piraeus, who play in a red and white striped kit. I had worn the colors of AEK Athens, a blood rival of the local club.
AEK's kit. Notice the resemblance?The ill-feelings I had gotten were real. It had been the equivalent of wearing a Yankees jersey into a Boston sports bar. Well, a Yankees lookalike jersey, but still.
I give you this story as a background for how being in the wrong place in the wrong jersey while in Greece can be dangerous. It can get you killed. Two Olympiakos fans were stabbed, one fatally, after a cup win over Panathinaikos this week. Police deny that the stabbings were football related, but with that country's track record, I would be suspicious. Especially as the deceased had been in trouble for football related violence before.
Today's lesson, then, is don't fuck with a Greek's football club. Trust me, you don't want to face the potential consequences.
Read more on "Greek rivalries turn deadly"...
Posts
