So exactly what can we expect tonight? Which Beckham will show up, and perhaps more importantly, which Donovan? They blab in the media (well, tellingly, only Becks did) about how they've patched up their differences, but the only way to know for sure is by examining the drivel put forth on the pitch.
Mercifully for the Galaxy, they get to ease Becks back into the league with a soft fixture against one of the worst teams in the league. Seriously, the Red Bulls have managed 2 wins, 13 defeats and 4 draws this season. And to think the RBNY got this bad the old-fashioned way, with a colossally hilarious string of poor personnel decisions, instead of overpaying one washed-up marquee name whose salary then crippled the franchise!
Wait... does Juan Pablo Angel count?
But I digress. The song above may or may not be a reasonable glimpse inside the mind of Los Angeles' two tortured souls, both figuring out a way to make the next 3 months tolerable. A win would make for a happy start.
15 mins to kickoff: Seriously, this is going to be awesome. FSC is running interviews with Beckham and Wahl in the pregame. Personally, I can't listen to this stuff anymore right now, even though I've been blogging about the right-sided midfielder all frickin' weekend.
10 mins to kickoff: And Beckham is full of shit. He knew this project wouldn't take a year or two years. He's in it for the long haul. Just fucking leave already!
Footage of the Columbus Crew visiting Barack Obama. Wonderful.
@Spectator - the Pele Scale! We should enlighten the masses as to our ingenious invention.
5 mins to kickoff: Grant Wahl pitchside for an interview! He reckons US soccer needs a good controversy, so why not something he started with the league's most iconic, misunderstood player? And no, he's not surprised that Donovan spoke as much as he did. So glad he did, too.
Predictions for the game? Score? Scorers? What will Beckham do? Donovan?
3 mins to kickoff: The Red Bulls will assume the position shortly. They are an awful, awful team. I'm thinking LA will win big, maybe 3-0 or so, and their victory will act as one of many impending false dawns for this team. OH GOD SHUT UP MAX BRETOS. My filter is on the fritz. For anyone interested, it's not so much a TV filter but an icepick lodged in my right ear, perforating the drum and making Bretos only half-intelligible amid the bleeding and pain.
2 mins to kickoff: That said, the other commentator noted that LA haven't won in "New York" since 2000. Maybe I should revise my prediction. Kickoff! Next!
LINE-UPS
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NEW YORK (4-4-2): Cepero - Pacheco, Sassano, Petke, Hall - Rojas, Celades, Stammler, Zimmerman - Kandji, Angel.
Subs: Wolyniec, Krupnik, Smith, Richards, Ubiparipovic.
LOS ANGELES (4-1-3-2): Ricketts - Dunivant, Berhalter, Gonzalez, Delagarza - Miglioranzi - Donovan, Lewis, Beckham - Eskandarian, Buddle.
Subs: Sanneh, Klein, Magee, Gordon, Kirovski.
Nice to see Becks and Landy split on separate wings, presumably to keep them as far as possible from one another lest they gripe and grumble about one another within earshot of one another.
Let us do this! Peeeeeeeeep!
LA Galaxy in blue, NY Red Bulls in white.
1 min: The "grass" is wet, as LA are first to experience its slipperiness. Sassano had slipped, allowing the ball to trickle towards Eskandarian, but cover was there to save the day.
Early, early pressure down at RBNY's end. Big surprise! At least the atmosphere is feisty and loud.
3 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and a slice of fried goal from Alecko Eskandarian!!! A fairly innocuous ball forward finds the striker, he nods it ahead into space, and nary a Red Bull has the wings to shut him down. And so, from 25 yards with Luke Sassano impersonating a traffic cone, Eskandarian has a crack on the volley and it rip-roars past Danny Cepero.Top corner shot. Hilarious start for the Red Bulls. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 1
The crowd remains unbowed despite the early dagger blow to the chest. LA are still setting the tempo in midfield, but the Red Bulls get something going down the right with Zimmerman and Hall, but Hall's cross floats kindly into Ricketts' grasp.
7 mins: I spoke too soon! RBNY make some progress down the right, Angel nips behind his marker and fires a shot from a narrow angle that Ricketts shins out for a corner. Good effort from Juan Pablo.
What's hilarious early (besides the RBNY concept of "man-marking") is the state of the pitch. No-one can remain on their feet! Players slipping left and right! I thought this is why Adi Dassler did what he did in the 1950s with removable studs.
9 mins: Awful defending by RBNY, tumbling and falling to keep out a string of Galaxy crosses into the box. Eventually they clear to Beckham 20 yards out, and his shot is easily blocked.
OUCH. Berhalter gets a yellow for completely decimating Kandji. The defender's lucky he got there just early enough to avoid a red.
11 mins: Angel's nothing if not persistent. He leaps high in the box and nods for goal from the edge of the box. Woulda snuck under the bar but Ricketts was ready for it.
Much better from RBNY, as Kandji's passing is wonderfully accurate. The move breaks down on the right as Zimmerman gets crowded out, and once the ball comes back to the left again, Rojas attempts his own Eskandarian special from fully 40 yards but Ricketts catches it on the line.
13 mins: This sodden, skid-inducing excuse for a pitch is causing all sorts of sloppiness. If it's not the ball bouncing strangely, it's the Keystone Kops-esque hilarity of everyone falling over themselves.
Still, RBNY amp up the pressure from a throw-in. Rojas pushes it in from the left, it's pinged out to Angel, and he slips Zimmerman free on the right. His cross misses the man in the middle, and Rojas' 2nd cross is snatched from the sky by Ricketts.
16 mins: Donovan and Beckham have linked up nicely a couple of times thus far. Oh, the healing power of winning. Plenty of room for both sides down the flanks as well, but so far, Donovan's been everywhere. Tracking back down the right, galloping down the left, popping up in the middle... you name it, he's done it.
17 mins: Hall pummels a cross into the stands after working hard to get clear down the right wing. Arena will be encouraged by his workrate, but dismayed by his Pennant-esque inability to cross the ball.
20 mins: This Kandji fellow is wreaking havoc up top. In fact, he only needs to stand still and trap the ball while defenders foul him left and right, and it's Berhalter again, tumbling into his back for no discernible reason. Needs to be careful after that early yellow... free-kick RBNY, 20+ yards out.
... and Rojas almost knocks it in! His cheeky chip over the wall takes a deflection and loops agonizingly this wide of the post with Ricketts, a former cricketer (thanks for that, BRETOS), beaten. Then, RBNY resumes normal service in wasting their corner kick.
24 mins: Great chance to double their lead! Donovan wins a footrace down the right wing and turns in a dangerous cross. With Buddle threatening, Mike Petke sticks out a leg and touches it behind for a corner. Great defending. LA's corner amounts to nothing.
26 mins: Beckham's been quiet. In fact, I don't even know where he is on the pitch as Donovan appears to be the new right winger. Oh wait, a free kick for LA some 40 yards out, there's Beckham behind the ball. Phew. He swerves one in but it's headed clear.
28 mins: No Bretos, Beckham is not dangerous from a free-kick 45 yards out and right against the touchline. Eskandarian gets a yellow for fouling someone or something.
30 mins: Take a breath, Red Bulls fans. The home team still knows how much you love them without the continual screaming.
Chance for LA! Eskandarian beats the offside trap but breaks his run so Donovan can sprint onto it. His cross is long to Lewis, and his shot is blocked.
31 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and the Red Bulls just don't learn, do they? Beckham swings in a corner, it's cleared as far as Landon Donovan some 20 yards out, and it's his turn to Eskandarian the living daylights out of the ball, catching it sublimely on the volley and snorting it past an absolutely helpless Danny Cepero. He was grabbing nothing but the night sky. Gorgeous goal, high-fives all round for LA, and I think I'll retract my revised prediction and stick with the original 3-0 scoreline. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 2
32 mins: I feel bad for Angel. He is a man without a team, really. Under pressure of a double-team at the edge of the box, all he can do is shoot weakly at Ricketts due to the lack of support in the middle.
34 mins: Hard foul in the midfield, and Becks has a free-kick to bend from 25 yards out...
... but it takes a deflection off Mo Kandji and dies mid-air. LA press again down the left wing this time, winning another corner. Beckham waltzes over to the RBNY section to take. Pacheco heads it clear, and Kandji is drowned out by a double-team in midfield. No love for RBNY currently, illustrated by Rojas letting a simple pass bobble up off his shin and out for an LA Galaxy throw. Poor stuff.
36 mins: The Red Bulls are just awful. Shockingly awful. Can they just delete the team and start over again? Bring back the Metrostars! Tony Meola!
37 mins: Coach Osorio should just put 6 at the back in order to relieve some embarrassment of his statues in midfield. Beckham comes inside and plays a swanky no-look pass to Eskandarian, who jogs some 30 yards before shooting and shaving some metal off the top of the crossbar with his effort. Can anyone on that Red Bull squad close a man down? Some positively USA v. Italy defending there. Donovan must be having deja vu.
Then, mild excitement at the other end as Kandji just misses out on a low cross by Hall from the right. And Bretos needs to learn to control himself because WE CANNOT HEAR WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DESCRIBE IF YOU ARE YELLING INTO THE MICROPHONE THAT YOU'RE HOLDING LESS THAN AN INCH FROM YOUR MOUTH.
40 mins: Donovan's toying with RBNY down the right, eluding a couple of challenges before Petke lowers the boom and nicks possession. Free-kick anyways on the right side. Duh Becks to take, but it's headed away by Sassano.
42 mins: Long-distance shooting for all! All of it rubbish, too. Kandji is trying to spark something for the home side, but he's one man against eleven.
AND A SERIES OF STUNNING SAVES BY RICKETTS! How did Rojas not bury that rebound? Ricketts dives to his right to keep out the initial shot by I-forget-who, but the danger lurks as Rojas is first to the loose ball and somehow rifles his shot right at Ricketts' legs. The goalie's block was enough to turn it around the post. If he'd have passed it a foot to his right, Angel would have had an open goal. When things aren't going your way, they're really not going your way.
44 mins: Sorry, had a Bretos moment there. My apologies. To tone down the hyperbole, Ricketts made two wonderful saves in quick succession.
GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL from absolutely nothing! And my score prediction from the pregame looks positively prescient! Landon Donovan gets the ball on the right, loops it across the edge of the box to a wide-open Eddie Lewis on the left side, and he volleys low, beating Cepero with the awkward bounce. Simply easy stuff for the Galaxy, and it's all coming from Donovan, really. Becks must feel great, both to be winning but also to be playing second fiddle for the night. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 3
HALF TIME: NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 3
Just about everything going the Hollywood way so far. The Galaxy looked relatively untroubled at the back, though the Red Bulls should have scored late on via Rojas. Beckham and Donovan are so gonna hug in the dressing room, and it's the mouthy American leading the charge on the pitch.
Now to go draw the winner of that Grant Wahl book a few people here and there have been talking about! Back shortly!
Drum Roll..... The winner of a copy of The Beckham Experiment as chosen at random is.... Kopper! Email us at the address so we can match you up with your prize. Sorry Goat. We will have another competition soon-ish, with more books to give away!
Re: this game... full-time can't come soon enough.
And we're back!
This is really the first time this season the LA Galaxy scored more than two goals in a game? Amazing.
46 mins: Buddle gets bundled over by Hall, giving Beckham a free-kick 20-odd yards out. He curls it into the box, it bobbles around a bit, it's knocked over for a corner.
Becks pumps it to the far post, and Donovan's wide open. Brimming with confidence, he cracks a volley but it's always spinning wide.
49 mins: Angel wins a free kick in typical Angel, hustle/bustle style. Kandji heads for goal from the cross, but it's never threatening Ricketts.
50 mins: The color commentator hints that comebacks are possible from 3-0 down, and he namechecks Liverpool v. Milan in 2004/05. Then he has the sense to correct himself, saying that the NY Red Bulls are not exactly Liverpool.
Corners corners corners for the Red Bulls, but nothing doing.
52 mins: Another free-kick for LA in the midfield, an area they've absolutely dominated. Oh, and I missed a wicked volley from Rojas a few minutes ago that gave Ricketts a scare. Aside from that shot, Rojas has been crap today. Same for Delagarza, Zimmerman and Petke/Stammler.
Seeing a banner on the sideline reminded me: how on earth did the Red Bulls make the MLS Cup final last year?
54 mins: Anything else on TV right now?
As much as it pains me to say, Donovan's been superb tonight. Energetic, always looking to get involved, never afraid to track back, and dangerous moving forward. He's the USA's Rooney, who in turn is the English Dirk Kuyt, much like Ji-Sung Park is the South Korean Kuyt. Conversely, Beckham's been quiet and subdued but has done his part when asked. As I thought, he's been good from the dead ball but very little else. Not mailing it in already, surely.
@The Fan's Attic -- sadly, not really if I remember correctly. People came out to witness the circus, and have done so with little vitriol. The odd smattering of boos and hisses when he's over in their section to take corners, but that's about it.
I do rate Mo Kandji though. Good workrate, decent enough trickery in possession, and fast. Would do well in the Colaship. Menacing not just because of his stature, but because he can play the ball well.
59 mins: The game is lulling, but you wouldn't know it from the crowd who are still in full song. USL liveblog tomorrow night. Anyone interested?
@The NY Kid -- no clue. I'm assuming he'd cry off anyway.
Angel wins another corner for RBNY, it's wasted, but then a lovely deep cross from the left lands on Celades' head, but he can only guide it right into Ricketts' stomach. Good chance, that.
@The NY Kid -- careful, people will think you're weird for answering your own question there.
62 mins: Lovely link-up play by Donovan and Eskandarian, but the final pass isn't there and RBNY clear.
Sub for the Red Bulls: Celades off, Dane Richards on.
64 mins: Corner for LA as Buddle bedazzles Petke before the defender regains awareness and toe-pokes it away. Eddie Lewis whips the inswinger into the crowd, but Donovan pushes with too much gusto and concedes a free-kick.
66 mins: Angel is flustered again, as his hard work and industry is squandered by a team-mate. It's sub Dane Richards' turn to disappoint, straying offside to receive Angel's pass following a lovely spin off his marker.
68 mins: The Galaxy are content to let RBNY pass it from side to side without really moving forward or threatening. The Galaxy counter with Donovan (he's everywhere!), who releases Buddle on the right side of the box. His thunderous shot is blocked by Cepero (I'm surprised it didn't kill him, unless the balls are a bit flat and thus making more noise than they should) for a corner, and Buddle can't get on the end of Klein's deep cross.
Sub for LA: Beckham off, Birchall on. Mixture of boos and cheers, few drinks containers hurled in his direction as he trots off, clapping and smiling all the way. He then salutes the crowd from the bench. Always playing the PR game. Always looking for photo ops. The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced Beckham is just some soccer-playing Manchurian Candidate.
71 mins: Sub for NY: Zimmerman off, Ubiparipovic on.
An LA counter gives Eskandarian a great shooting chance, but it's right at Cepero. Lovely one-touch soccer by the Galaxy moving forward. Before that, Ricketts came a mile off his line for some reason but is beaten to the ball by Richards, who twists and turns but can't shoot through all the bodies.
Another sub for LA: Eskandarian off, Magee on.
75 mins: RBNY again shoot themselves in the foot, ruining some great positive build-up by wandering offside. Lazy. I was just about to note how they have been a little unlucky with this scoreline having created some golden scoring chances. Then again, they also defend about as well as the French, so I can't show too much pity.
Angel tries to get a good position on a cross from the right, but he's swarmed by three Galaxy defenders. The guy gets no help whatsoever.
78 mins: Bretos allows himself to indulge in some gooey, dreamy-eyed fantasies about what might happen if the Galaxy win all of MLS and every MLS anything ever, and whether it'd be enough to convince Beckham to stay. Short Answer: No. England won't pick him from all the way over here.
Sub for RBNY: Kandji off, Wolyniec on.
83 mins: Bretos is talking about Argentine soccer. Yet another league, MLS included, that Bretos knows nothing about. He just likes to roll his 'r's when pronouncing all those team names. Douche.
84 mins: The live-action equivalent of this at the moment:
86 mins:
Spoke too soon! Wolyniec taps it in with Ricketts beaten, but the ref calls it back for a handball by Gonzalez and demands RBNY take a penalty instead! Let's hope they miss! It'd be hilarious!
87 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and a rare smile for Juan Pablo Angel tonight. He sends Ricketts the wrong way on the penalty. And I'm thoroughly pissed that my score prediction is now incorrect. NY Red Bulls 1, LA Galaxy 3
89 mins: As you were, folks. It's been a rather quiet second half, which was to be expected. The dream return for Beckham, because people tend to gloss over the backstabbing, doublespeak and general lack of commitment when the team is winning.
90 mins + 1: ANOTHER PENALTY FOR THE RED BULLS! BUT ANGEL MISSES IT! Gonzalez commits another handball in the box, but Angel rushes his take and Ricketts gets enough on it to kiss it off the post and back into his arms. Absolutely hilarious way to end this game.
FULL TIME: NY Red Bulls 1, LA Galaxy 3
Wonderful stuff for LA, who were aided by a monstrous effort from Donovan, and some sharp counter-attacking, in their win. Becks and Donovan share a split-second loose embrace after the whistle, and maybe it'll be all smiles at the Home Depot Center from now on.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
MLS Liveblog: NY Red Bulls v. LA Galaxy
T-Minus 2 Hours
Until the fun at Giants Stadium. Join me for a liveblog, won't you? The beer is cold, the chips and pretzels are all kinda neatly arranged in bowls to keep them separate (hate snack-mixing), and the TV is ready and equipped with a brand-new Bretos Filter to tune out the inanity.
I'll be here from 7.45 to follow along tonight's MLS tilt between RBNY and LAG, thus concluding our MLS coverage until next season.
Oh, and I'll generate some fake suspense in announcing the winner of that Grant Wahl book at halftime. Catch the excitement! Who will get a book for free!?!? WHO WILL IT BE!??!?!
Beckham Speaks Again!
In just two brief days, I reckon Beckham's undone all that dubious goodwill work with kids and Zinedine Zidane that we kept getting emails about (more on that soon...). Yesterday was that EPL comment about how he'd play anywhere, just give him a ring someone and he'll do it, etc.
Then, he and Grant Wahl had a little donnybrook during a far-from-routine presser ahead of his season debut at the Red Bulls, which I'll totally be liveblogging by the way (beginning at 7.45pm. Bring the dip, I got the chips!).
Well, today saw him hide behind the England manager as justification for his continual want-away-ness. I mean, it's not his fault he needs to play anywhere but in Los Angeles.
It was Fabio! Fabio told him to!
Cue the "well if Fabio told you to jump off a cliff, would you do it?" jokes, but seriously, let's look at what he said and then make fun of him.Leading up to the World Cup, the England manager has made it very clear to me that I need to be playing at a European level." (regarding playing for England) I will do everything possible. I'll always regret it if I didn't do everything to give myself a chance to be involved in that. At the moment, my priority is the rest of the season and also playing and keeping in every squad for England and representing my country. Going forward, of course I want to be involved in the World Cup. I've not hidden that fact."
That's of course assuming that you're going to be included in the World Cup squad. I mean, you're not getting any younger and you're becoming a little one-dimensional on the right wing, having been supplanted by the likes of Walcott and Lennon as a more agile, spritely option.
Would it kill you to just keep your mouth shut and enjoy the LA Galaxy for even five minutes? Tomorrow, I await the presser where he claims God came to him in a dream and implored him to move to Barcelona immediately.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Any Team Will Do
Seeing as though it's become a bit of a Beckham day around here thanks to his unwitting dominance of the news cycle, there's yet more PR fun from the blonde muppet in the form of comments about the English Premier League.
Basically, he'd play for any English club, having suddenly dropped his self-imposed limit of just Manchester United as being worthy of his presence.
You heard it, Citeh. Save Beckham!
Becks recently touched down in the USA to pick up his trail of enmity and discord from where he left off in the winter, seemingly determined to see out that albatross of a contract currently hung around the neck of his LA Galaxy overlords (though let's be honest; the Galaxy don't control anything).
I mean, he is going to honor that deal, right?"Never say never. I would definitely consider it.," said Beckham when asked if he would consider playing for another Premier League side. "When I left my heart was in Manchester – I couldn't see myself playing against United. Now I wouldn't rule it out."
Dear oh dear, Becks. So now you're so desperate to depart that you'll accept playing time from any old EPL has-been just to get out of Dodge?
Los Angeles should just sell him now and be done with the matter, unless they like having the rest of the league, nay, the rest of the world, looking at them and laughing hysterically. Becks also says he's patched up his differences with Donovan, but given their respective egos, there's no way a 60-minute chat can undo 2+ years of festering dissatisfaction, dishonesty and disgruntlement.
Still, I'll be watching and liveblogging the trip to NY on Thursday (I was originally set with tickets until our babysitter fell through! Blast!) with great interest to see how they mesh together. My guess is "not very well."
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Superclasico live thread: Becks reps our blog
So, the Haitans get a good result against the USMNT a team of Americans wearing Nike kit. Next up is tonight's Superclasico at the Home Depot Center between the Galaxy and Chivas USA. Still no Beckham, although he has returned to Southern California and spoken to the press about Landy's comments in the forthcoming Wahl book. ZOMG MLS controversy after the jump.
According to ESPN, Beckham said:"It's unprofessional in my eyes. In every soccer player's eyes throughout the world it would be unprofessional to speak out about a teammate especially in the press and not to your face," Beckham said.
"But I'm going to turn it on a positive spin because that's what this needs. But in 17 years, I have played with the biggest teams in the world and the biggest players and not once have I been criticized for my professionalism. It's important to get this cleared up and I will be speaking to Landon either this evening or over the next couple of days."
Hopefully they can settle their differences over some Pinot Grigio and lamb pizza. Meanwhile, comment away on the match.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
QT: Christian Vieri to LA Galaxy?
I really hope this isn't true: reports abound that 37-year-old Italian striker Christian Vieri is set for a trial with the Galaxy, having run out of options for playing time at his current club, Atalanta. Something about him being old as fuck and useless, I think.
If the Galaxy keep signing crocks like this, they'll soon become known as the Tottenham of MLS. Sergei Rebrov, anyone?
[Goal.com]
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Look what you've done, David!
Finally, we get the nitty-gritty fan reaction from those hardcore Galaxy fans. Best not call it a protest though, naughty Sun newspaper... I only count two people with t-shirts and they don't look like they coordinated beforehand.
Even so, I wasn't aware that there were many hardcore Galaxy fans; perhaps I miscounted.
I thought they were all in Aspen until April.
So he's lost that ember of a Galaxy fanbase... does it really matter?
The bigger issue here is the depressing emptiness of the stadium (see below). Granted, it's the attendance for a meaningless, artificially-designed Mickey Mouse tournament that barely anyone even knows about (hooray for marketing!), but even so, can we really expect the place to be packed to the rafters consistently during the regular season without the coiffured moron?
It's doubtful.
You see, and allow me to make some rather blanket judgments here, Los Angeles is the epicenter of celebrity in the US, and the bulk of the population serve to idolize and chase these celebrities wherever they go. Beckham obviously transcends the beautiful game, along with his ugly robot wife, as irritating, ubiquitous global brands, and thus, they become a simple, natural draw for the Galaxy.
To serve the point, I'll ignore the fact that a. the team were utter shit during his time there, and b. the stadium still wasn't overflowing on those balmy summer evenings when he did decide to turn up and prance around on the right wing.
Remove him from the equation, and you're left with what MLS is littered with: mediocre franchises with minimal regional pull and a void of star power.
Thankfully, the brave supporters pictured do manage to get their point across, that they too are sick of their blond savior-who-didn't-really-save-them. He'll have to open a hundred more nominal soccer camps for children to atone this goodwill.
I'm certain that the pile of money and designed clothes foisted upon him by the Milan crowd (not to mention - gasp - competitive soccer!) will cushion the blow of these handmade t-shirts.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
But Doesn't Milan Touch Us All?
Sure that's a dynamite headline—theirs not ours—but of relevance here is the story below.
If you can't see it, it reads: "After days of indiscretions and refutation, it seems that David Beckham has finally obtained this that it wanted."
That's some top notch reporting. Okay, it's actually run through a translator, but it seems as if the Italian iteration of Goal.com (oh, should probably mention that's a screencap of Goal's website) thinks the L.A.-to-Milan deal is done.
There's a full screenshot available here.
Compare that to the English version of the page found here. In the English language version of the Goal story, Beckham is still in limbo (or in a really bad movie with flying dogs).
Anyway, from these two stories we can conclude one of three things:
A) The Italian story is actually the result of some horrible Babelfish work.
B) Editorial and factual consistency across languages isn't a priority at Goal.com.
C) Beckham is like some sort of footballing Schroedinger Cat, who is in some probabilistic state where he's both in Milan and L.A. and only by observing him, do we force him into one or the other.
This last one might be true if we wait until the Wednesday match and all observe him in Milan colors and force him into the Italian state of being. Although after being declared fit for the UEFA Cup match, Ancelotti has now backed off those comments and said both Becks and Pato are doubtful for the match.
The MLS deadline obviously came and went on Firday. Then Milan declared Garber's deadline a 'tactic' and said they were still sending an entourage to L.A. this Friday (or maybe Thursday) to continue negotiations.
This is getting boring. Worse, it's making us sympathetic towards Beckham. He's not even in a money grab, he just wants to play soccer at a level high enough to give him a chance for South Africa in 2010. And with its $2.19M salary cap, that ain't MLS.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
UF Quick Throw: Hopefully, the Becks saga will only last 6 more days
The Galaxy put a clause in Becks' loan to AC Milan so it can't be extended beyond March 9th. So, if AC wants him, it'll need to be sorted out before the January window closes. Here's hoping it does, for all our sakes
[The Sun]
Monday, January 12, 2009
Landycakes and Beckypants: a tale of two MLS runaways
To my surprise, both LA Galaxy defectors got some decent playing time this weekend. No, their European adventures are not merely exercises in brand development, product endorsement, shirt sales and/or possible reconnaissance for new porn starlets (Donovan has a career behind the camera on some dodgy VW van sex series, doesn't he?), but they're actually in Germany and Italy to have an impact for their respective teams.
We'll brush aside the semantics of "impact", considering both teams are already loaded to the brim with talent and are settling in for the usual title chases in their respective leagues, but if we make an analogy to ice cream, well, one more chocolate chip can't hurt, can
it?
So how did they do?
At the Mohammed Bin Zayed Stadium, Bayern beat Dubai's Al Jazeera FC 3-2 in a friendly, and Landy got a full 90 minutes, setting up two goals and generally impressing the guy who should be managing the US Men's Team immensely. "Landon has class," was all Klinsmann really had to say, but that's alright, as we have video!
(Yes, that's Donovan with the final pass to Bastian Schweinsteiger)
He was fouled in the 2nd half, winning a free-kick that Daniel Van Buyten put away for their 2nd goal, and he was one of only two players to get a full game. Not bad, Landy, not bad. I give you six weeks until you get homesick due to never seeing the pitch during games of actual consequence.
Meanwhile, in Italy, Beckham's Milan fought hard against Roma for a 2-2 draw, and while Beckham's performance was tidy, it was really all about Pato. As Paolo Bandini reflects, Pato got both goals and Becks' input was largely limited to the occasional cross and/or corner.
However, shades of rust were evident as he gave the ball away more than anyone else on the pitch (tied with the also-ran Clarence Seedorf for 13, um, giveaways? New soccer stats are frightening) and was outranked by Ronaldinho for the honour of taking most of the juicy free-kicks around the box. Still, Ancelotti surprised everyone by giving Beckham the start while Flamini languished on the bench, but overall, an encouraging start for him too.
Still, all this buzz about Landon in Germany and David in Italy only serves to reinforce one essential thing: one of 'em certainly isn't returning to Los Angeles on time, and the other may well have finally gotten over their previous European malaise to give it another try.
Monday, October 27, 2008
FAIL!
So lost in all of the hoopla this weekend—the quarter-season title tilt in the EPL, Ramos out at Spurs, and a nutty AtlΓ©tico Madrid league match for the third straight week—was the fact that MLS' regular season ended yesterday.
What's not as interesting as who finished first (congrats to Sigi and the Crew) is who finished last. Yes, it was the LA Galaxy. Or at least the rest of the legitimate soccer-loving world thinks so. Here's the MLS table from the Guardian. Notice the Galaxy in last place with the fewest points and the worst goal difference.
Compare that with MLS' own official table. See, the Galaxy aren't the worst team in the league. They still suck and are missing the playoffs again, but at least they are looking down on someone.
MLS is actually right. Go figure that the league would get their own standings correct. The tie-breakers can be found here; and sure enough in this cockamamie league, the first tie-breaker isn't goal difference, but head-to-head results. The Galaxy beat San Jose 2 of 3, so they get the pwnage. "Woo! We're only thirteenth." Congrats.
The funny part (to me anyway) isn't that the Guardian is wrong, but that it doesn't even occur to them that MLS would use something beside goal difference as the first tie breaker (it actually doesn't occur to them that they would use anything besides a single table either). But the Guardian isn't alone. On Fox Soccer Report last night (October 26), when they put up the Western Conference standings, they too had the Galaxy in DFL. On 33 points. Behind San Jose on goal difference.
Two more things. The man who was going to bring soccer to the American masses? His regular season finale wasn't even broadcast in the native tongue. No, not Algonquin or Cherokee or any of the like but the only outlet showing the match yesterday was Telefutura (on my non-HD TV anyway, I don't know if HDNET was running it). That's doubly embarrassing when you think it might be Becks' last game with the Galaxy.
There is the rumored loan to AC Milan. There is also the rumor that Milan would be cool with making that loan permanent. Now the latter seems very unlikely as the former is seemingly slightly less likely than it did just last Friday. But, it's not out of the realm of possibility.
Just a thought: Why? Clearly, Milan would do it to sell a boatload of Beckham jerseys. And Beckham wants to do it to stay on Capello's radar for England's national team as things creep toward South Africa in 2010 and he creeps toward Bobby Moore and Peter Shilton. But Kaka, Gattuso, Flamini (dead to me), Ronaldinho, Pirlo... shit, Becks is in the running with Seedorf and Ambrosini to see who's the sixth best midfielder on that squad.
And it's not like they can sub him in and out for dead ball situations (sub in sure, but that means he really only valuable late in matches when Milan is trailing).
So Becks continually reaffirms his commitment to the Galaxy but if he didn't come back, would it really surprise anyone? The Galaxy have already made their money back in spades (probably... remember the $50M a year figure was based on his cut of contingent revenues and his straight salary was $5.5 in base), and might be better served by getting on with rebuilding the team. And Beckham might be better served getting on with his self-serving national team ambitions. He's not the player he was. If Milan truly want him, then why wouldn't the Galaxy say "Arrivederci"?
[Update: Ha ha Soccernet, too]
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Now That We're Poo....
...I want to move the goal posts. That's the message from L.A Galaxy owner Tim Leiweke. He wants the salary cap and designated player rule dropped. Why? Because the Galaxy suck and he wants to go shopping. The man who initiated the 'designated player' rule also known as the 'Beckham' rule has seen his team win one game in 13 over the last 3 months and has decided that he needs to replace the duffers he currently employs within his cap of $2 million a year.
Of course you can't sign more than one or two over rated aging Premiership stars for that paltry sum. The MLS salary cap is the equivalent of a League One sides yearly wage bill and this is one reason why the standard of the MLS is no better than League One.
The current salary cap is a mile away from the spending of a bottom Premiership side, in fact it's far from being close to that of a Championship side. Norwich City's wage bill this season is 10 Million pounds. That's about 17.5 million Dollars or the wages of EIGHT MLS teams. For Leiweke and his Galaxy to sign some quality new blood like Beckham, Angel or Huckerby they will need to splash some serious cash. L.A's recent struggles could be down to the fact they had to ditch several half-decent players in order to obtain one of their high-priced aging imports. They have many!
Raising the cap to accommodate Leiweke is possible but only as long as teams can sustain the cost to be competitive. That $2 million cap exists for a reason and the MLS appears to be looking for a slow, steady build rather than an exciting rush to extinction seen in the days of Pele, Marsh and Canaglia!
Upping the cap ceiling will improve the standard of the play for sure. Better players will arrive from abroad, but for the love of god can M.L.S teams stop signing useless old duffers like Abel Xavier and Celestine Babayaro in order to flog t-shirts? They should be improving gradually by signing decent players in their prime from the Championship or League 1. Three or four Cameron Jerome's, Casper Gorkss or Darren Beckfords will do much more for the standard of the league than one David Beckham.
-Bigus
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Wild Speculation and Irresponsible Rumor Mongering
We're not really journalists by any rigorous standards, so we're relatively comfortable repeating things that we cannot confirm.
But one of the local sports talk radio shows in Houston (790 the Sports Animal... and great job with the name guys) runs a show on Monday nights called The Dynamo Power Hour that focuses on, no doy, the Houston Dynamo in particular but discusses soccer in general.
The show is usually hosted by Glenn Davis, who does the calls for the games locally. Davis is on loan out to NBC as he is part of its Olympic coverage in New York, where they are calling the games from monitors, much like ESPN did with its Euro 08 broadcasts.
Anyway, the guest host on last night, Monday, August 11, called Davis for the first segment of the show (and apologies that I didn't get the guest host's name). One of the first topics of conversation was about the resignation of Ruud Gullit and the firing of Alexi Lalas in L.A.
Davis then said that the rumor floating around NBC's soccer central in New York was that Bruce Arena and John Harkes would be turning up in L.A. Davis didn't elaborate much, just saying that they would be moving in to fill the voids at the Galaxy.
Presumably that would be Arena as coach and Harkes as GM. I can't imagine it would be the other way around, unless I lack proper imaginatory skills.
So we're just passing it along. But if it turns out to be true, you heard it here first. Unless of course you were listening to the Sports Animal last night in which case you're probably hearing it, or more accurately reading it, here second.
Monday, August 11, 2008
This Just In: Galaxy Goners
It appears that despite his bluster and bravado, Alexi Lalas' team, the LA Galaxy, just weren't good enough.
Hot off the UF teletype, Galaxy GM Alexi Lalas and team manager Ruud Gullit are shuffling off to the unemployment office.
Ruud Gullit has resigned as coach of the slumping Los Angeles Galaxy for
personal reasons, and president/general manager Alexi Lalas also is out of a
job, a source familiar with the situation says.
The Galaxy may have been good enough for the EPL (Suck it, Barclay's), but it just wasn't good enough for MLS.
Former US National Team and Galaxy stalwart Cobi Jones will be the interim manager.
Read more on "This Just In: Galaxy Goners"...
Monday, August 4, 2008
David who?
Hucks: Big impact in the MLS
Some of you will remember how upset old Bigus was when Darren Huckerby was released from Norwich City. Some of you will even remember a post about him joining the worst team in the MLS. Some of you used our comments section here and on other posts and sites to doubt the impact of the aforementioned Darren Huckerby... well, I am pleased to offer a little update. Huckerby has played 3 games, scored twice and looked impressive.
Please find the highlights of yesterday's game (in Spanish) below for your Monday afternoon entertainment. San Jose have looked a much-improved team in recent weeks, as the arrival of Lima, Huckerby and Alvarez has made all the difference. The Earthquakes are still bottom of the West but now they're only 5 points behind the Galaxy! If the good form continues (unbeaten in 4) and they can build on yesterday's win, they will be chasing a playoff spot. I think there is just one thing left to say...
Yesterday Hucks lined up against Beckham as his new team hosted the LA Galaxy in front of 26,071 footy-thirsty Californians. Most left knowing exactly what Huckerby has to offer the M.L.S. In fact he left Beckham firmly in the shadows as he put in an excellent performance and scored a typical 'Huckerby' goal: a run down the left, cut inside, right foot shot. A quick look at the Earthquakes website this morning reveals Darren also dominates the man of the match voting online for the third straight week, currently taking 69% of the vote!
NNNNN..GOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.
- Bigus.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
From Backpass to Post: The LA Galaxy Are Morons
Okay, what the fuck is going on with the Galaxy? Really, Alexi Lalas can talk about being the marquee franchise all he wants but: A) That's in a tenth rate league and B) As a GM he has won exactly two things: nothing and dick.
Then there's the coach, former two-time World Player of the Year Ruud Gullit, letting this little bit fly in the English press, as he told the Sunday Times:
“I’m sure that when people think of LA Galaxy, the picture that comes to mind is not of our staff making phone calls to friends on Friday to see if they can play in a reserve game on Sunday, but, strange as it may seem, this is the reality,” reveals Gullit, sitting in the sun near the VIP area of an empty stadium. “Two weeks ago we had a game at home [against San Jose] and I had two of my office staff from the commercial department playing, two people whose job is to sit in the office all day doing their work."
Gullit goes on to explain the reality of the situation in that there are 26 players on the roster. Five were injured and there is a rule in MLS that prevents reserve team players from playing more than 120 minutes in 48 hours.
Then he adds of the reserves, which are usually scheduled for the day after the first team games, "If they have played the day before in the first team for 90 minutes you can do the maths."
"Maths." Awesome.
But there is more. So much more Gullity goodness.
“In the first reserve game of the season at Colorado I had a few players who could play for only 70 minutes and another who only could play for half an hour. So what did we do? We started with 10 men because we had to. You can say that it’s only a reserve game, but you can’t operate like this because the reserve game is important... If I have a reserve game and come up two men short, what happens? We have to call people from their job, maybe a carpenter, and they just come to play with our reserve team. If we play in Toronto, we have to call people in Toronto because no one will travel on their own all that way.
"Of course, we laugh about it a little bit, but in the end it’s not a laughing matter and it’s not good... this is an example of the things I am trying to adapt to. I’m not trying to change it yet, I’m trying to adapt to it, but in the end I’ll say, ‘You need to do things in a certain way because otherwise it’s not serious’. Really, it’s ridiculous.”
Those are the bits—or edited portions of them—that have made the rounds in the L.A. Times and The Spoiler where we first were made hip to it. But there is also this little bit of tid from the story (originally reported in the L.A. Times) that is equally as priceless:
Last weekend [Gullit] was compelled to introduce in the second half against Houston Dynamo a player, Joe Franchino, whom he had watched only on videotape.
"Yes, Galaxy fans, the same Joe Franchino . . . who, along with former [New England] Revolution teammate Gary Flood, was tossed out of a recent Boston Red Sox-New York Yankees game at Fenway Park after fans complained of their obnoxious behaviour,” Grahame Jones reported last week in the LA Times.
“He is also the same Joe Franchino slugged by then teammate [and current Fulham striker] Clint Dempsey at training camp a few years back. He is also the same Joe Franchino who played only 57 minutes of soccer last season because of injuries. So the questions here are: just who made this trade? Did Galaxy coach Ruud Gullit know anything about it? . . . '
It appears that Gullit is not totally in the loop on the transaction front. Last week he was asked about the acquisition of defenders Scott Bolkan and Vardan Adzemian and their subsequent loan to the Portland Timbers. Gullit looked blank. He had never heard of either player.
This is beyond ridiculous, particularly for an organization trying to brand itself as the Gold Standard of MLS. Right? People hip to the designated player rules and the MLS salary cap are aware that the Galaxy's paying off of Landycakes and Beckham has left little money to round out the squad (never mind that somehow they have a third designated player in Carlos Ruiz—each team is allowed a max of two and you have to trade for a second designated player slot to accomplish that, which apparently the Galaxy haven't done), but did anyone think it was this bad?
I'd like to be sympathetic to Lalas, but I can't. And is his fault for talking a big game. That and the league seems to make it up as they go to accommodate the Galaxy (and other players and teams at times).
But isn't this the same organization that had half of Santa Monica come tryout for an open slot on the team (publicity stunt) and play with Becks? You really can't find a couplathree people from that pool that are passable footballers that are willing to be fill-ins on the reserves if necessary?
As little as Americans generally care about soccer, I don't think you could even measure how little they care about MLS reserve squad soccer. Whatever the unit of that caring is, it's magnitude is probably in angstroms, but it's indicative of a fairly unprofessional organization, or just a very, very under-qualified general manager.
Really, can any failed rocker get a front office job with AEG? Because I was in a pretty cool band in college.
Read more on "From Backpass to Post: The LA Galaxy Are Morons"...
Thursday, January 24, 2008
David Beckham, What a World-Killing Wanker
This is how it is. You get to the top and they try to bring you back down. Here we have a man living the dream. Wife, kids, money, living in Beverly Hills, and all the press wants to do is shit on him. Well, I for one, am having it.
Today we learn that David Beckham is the dirtiest Englishman on the whole planet. Even when we include this guy. Inside, we'll break down some of the numbers and see just how Becks stacks up with some average Americans.
Beckham is, of course, "playing" for LA Galaxy while trying to earn his 100th cap for England. He's probably also on his way to becoming a Scientologist, but that's really not germane to the discussion (or is it?). Of course, club and country being so far apart (5500 miles) leads to a lot of Frequent Flier miles. Those miles are industry code for how much you are killing the planet, and Becks is doing a smash up job.
Someone with a lot more time than me calculates that Becks logged about 250,000 miles in the air last year, and not all of that was when Steve Sidwell took him out. That equals up to over 20 trips between his new home and his old one. It's also equal to one trip from LA to the moon, but that's just one way.
So how about some hard numbers?, you say. Okay, why not?, I answer. Beckham is theorized to have been responsible for 163 tons of Carbon Dioxide last year, just under twenty times of what the Average Englishman puts out. But he's in America now, so we have to look at how he stacks up with Americans. Let's take an average American in the news, Michael Bloomberg. The Mayor, who has advocated a greener style for his city, pumped 364 tons of the stuff in the atmosphere last year. Or, as I like to call it, 2.23 Beckhams' worth. Sure, Becks is high for an average American, as we do about 20 tons of damage per person a year, but he's low for an American in the news. Some difference could be answered by the stupid English version of a ton, but I'm not touching that.
Some discussion is also given to the Beckham's large fleet of 15 vehicles. That does seem like a lot. I know I only have two in my household, but then, I only have one kid. There must be some sort of geometric exponential that goes on when you have three kids. Unfortunately, the article make no mention of how much fuel goes into these cars, but it can't be as much as Shaq uses. Shaq spends $24K a month on gas. He must have one of those cars that goes 7 feet to the tank.
Cheer up Becks lovers. It's not all bad news. There are plenty of worse people out there, even some bad ones in Britain. That doesn't mean he's off the hook with us, though. We may not stop until he gives up his jet-setting, footballing ways forever. Even then, we'll undoubtedly be hit with links for how he's moving to some smaller club, even when he's retired. Right, fellas?
Thanks to my blogmate, E-town Hooligan, for the graphic.
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