So exactly what can we expect tonight? Which Beckham will show up, and perhaps more importantly, which Donovan? They blab in the media (well, tellingly, only Becks did) about how they've patched up their differences, but the only way to know for sure is by examining the drivel put forth on the pitch.
Mercifully for the Galaxy, they get to ease Becks back into the league with a soft fixture against one of the worst teams in the league. Seriously, the Red Bulls have managed 2 wins, 13 defeats and 4 draws this season. And to think the RBNY got this bad the old-fashioned way, with a colossally hilarious string of poor personnel decisions, instead of overpaying one washed-up marquee name whose salary then crippled the franchise!
Wait... does Juan Pablo Angel count?
But I digress. The song above may or may not be a reasonable glimpse inside the mind of Los Angeles' two tortured souls, both figuring out a way to make the next 3 months tolerable. A win would make for a happy start.
15 mins to kickoff: Seriously, this is going to be awesome. FSC is running interviews with Beckham and Wahl in the pregame. Personally, I can't listen to this stuff anymore right now, even though I've been blogging about the right-sided midfielder all frickin' weekend.
10 mins to kickoff: And Beckham is full of shit. He knew this project wouldn't take a year or two years. He's in it for the long haul. Just fucking leave already!
Footage of the Columbus Crew visiting Barack Obama. Wonderful.
@Spectator - the Pele Scale! We should enlighten the masses as to our ingenious invention.
5 mins to kickoff: Grant Wahl pitchside for an interview! He reckons US soccer needs a good controversy, so why not something he started with the league's most iconic, misunderstood player? And no, he's not surprised that Donovan spoke as much as he did. So glad he did, too.
Predictions for the game? Score? Scorers? What will Beckham do? Donovan?
3 mins to kickoff: The Red Bulls will assume the position shortly. They are an awful, awful team. I'm thinking LA will win big, maybe 3-0 or so, and their victory will act as one of many impending false dawns for this team. OH GOD SHUT UP MAX BRETOS. My filter is on the fritz. For anyone interested, it's not so much a TV filter but an icepick lodged in my right ear, perforating the drum and making Bretos only half-intelligible amid the bleeding and pain.
2 mins to kickoff: That said, the other commentator noted that LA haven't won in "New York" since 2000. Maybe I should revise my prediction. Kickoff! Next!
LINE-UPS
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NEW YORK (4-4-2): Cepero - Pacheco, Sassano, Petke, Hall - Rojas, Celades, Stammler, Zimmerman - Kandji, Angel.
Subs: Wolyniec, Krupnik, Smith, Richards, Ubiparipovic.
LOS ANGELES (4-1-3-2): Ricketts - Dunivant, Berhalter, Gonzalez, Delagarza - Miglioranzi - Donovan, Lewis, Beckham - Eskandarian, Buddle.
Subs: Sanneh, Klein, Magee, Gordon, Kirovski.
Nice to see Becks and Landy split on separate wings, presumably to keep them as far as possible from one another lest they gripe and grumble about one another within earshot of one another.
Let us do this! Peeeeeeeeep!
LA Galaxy in blue, NY Red Bulls in white.
1 min: The "grass" is wet, as LA are first to experience its slipperiness. Sassano had slipped, allowing the ball to trickle towards Eskandarian, but cover was there to save the day.
Early, early pressure down at RBNY's end. Big surprise! At least the atmosphere is feisty and loud.
3 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and a slice of fried goal from Alecko Eskandarian!!! A fairly innocuous ball forward finds the striker, he nods it ahead into space, and nary a Red Bull has the wings to shut him down. And so, from 25 yards with Luke Sassano impersonating a traffic cone, Eskandarian has a crack on the volley and it rip-roars past Danny Cepero.Top corner shot. Hilarious start for the Red Bulls. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 1
The crowd remains unbowed despite the early dagger blow to the chest. LA are still setting the tempo in midfield, but the Red Bulls get something going down the right with Zimmerman and Hall, but Hall's cross floats kindly into Ricketts' grasp.
7 mins: I spoke too soon! RBNY make some progress down the right, Angel nips behind his marker and fires a shot from a narrow angle that Ricketts shins out for a corner. Good effort from Juan Pablo.
What's hilarious early (besides the RBNY concept of "man-marking") is the state of the pitch. No-one can remain on their feet! Players slipping left and right! I thought this is why Adi Dassler did what he did in the 1950s with removable studs.
9 mins: Awful defending by RBNY, tumbling and falling to keep out a string of Galaxy crosses into the box. Eventually they clear to Beckham 20 yards out, and his shot is easily blocked.
OUCH. Berhalter gets a yellow for completely decimating Kandji. The defender's lucky he got there just early enough to avoid a red.
11 mins: Angel's nothing if not persistent. He leaps high in the box and nods for goal from the edge of the box. Woulda snuck under the bar but Ricketts was ready for it.
Much better from RBNY, as Kandji's passing is wonderfully accurate. The move breaks down on the right as Zimmerman gets crowded out, and once the ball comes back to the left again, Rojas attempts his own Eskandarian special from fully 40 yards but Ricketts catches it on the line.
13 mins: This sodden, skid-inducing excuse for a pitch is causing all sorts of sloppiness. If it's not the ball bouncing strangely, it's the Keystone Kops-esque hilarity of everyone falling over themselves.
Still, RBNY amp up the pressure from a throw-in. Rojas pushes it in from the left, it's pinged out to Angel, and he slips Zimmerman free on the right. His cross misses the man in the middle, and Rojas' 2nd cross is snatched from the sky by Ricketts.
16 mins: Donovan and Beckham have linked up nicely a couple of times thus far. Oh, the healing power of winning. Plenty of room for both sides down the flanks as well, but so far, Donovan's been everywhere. Tracking back down the right, galloping down the left, popping up in the middle... you name it, he's done it.
17 mins: Hall pummels a cross into the stands after working hard to get clear down the right wing. Arena will be encouraged by his workrate, but dismayed by his Pennant-esque inability to cross the ball.
20 mins: This Kandji fellow is wreaking havoc up top. In fact, he only needs to stand still and trap the ball while defenders foul him left and right, and it's Berhalter again, tumbling into his back for no discernible reason. Needs to be careful after that early yellow... free-kick RBNY, 20+ yards out.
... and Rojas almost knocks it in! His cheeky chip over the wall takes a deflection and loops agonizingly this wide of the post with Ricketts, a former cricketer (thanks for that, BRETOS), beaten. Then, RBNY resumes normal service in wasting their corner kick.
24 mins: Great chance to double their lead! Donovan wins a footrace down the right wing and turns in a dangerous cross. With Buddle threatening, Mike Petke sticks out a leg and touches it behind for a corner. Great defending. LA's corner amounts to nothing.
26 mins: Beckham's been quiet. In fact, I don't even know where he is on the pitch as Donovan appears to be the new right winger. Oh wait, a free kick for LA some 40 yards out, there's Beckham behind the ball. Phew. He swerves one in but it's headed clear.
28 mins: No Bretos, Beckham is not dangerous from a free-kick 45 yards out and right against the touchline. Eskandarian gets a yellow for fouling someone or something.
30 mins: Take a breath, Red Bulls fans. The home team still knows how much you love them without the continual screaming.
Chance for LA! Eskandarian beats the offside trap but breaks his run so Donovan can sprint onto it. His cross is long to Lewis, and his shot is blocked.
31 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and the Red Bulls just don't learn, do they? Beckham swings in a corner, it's cleared as far as Landon Donovan some 20 yards out, and it's his turn to Eskandarian the living daylights out of the ball, catching it sublimely on the volley and snorting it past an absolutely helpless Danny Cepero. He was grabbing nothing but the night sky. Gorgeous goal, high-fives all round for LA, and I think I'll retract my revised prediction and stick with the original 3-0 scoreline. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 2
32 mins: I feel bad for Angel. He is a man without a team, really. Under pressure of a double-team at the edge of the box, all he can do is shoot weakly at Ricketts due to the lack of support in the middle.
34 mins: Hard foul in the midfield, and Becks has a free-kick to bend from 25 yards out...
... but it takes a deflection off Mo Kandji and dies mid-air. LA press again down the left wing this time, winning another corner. Beckham waltzes over to the RBNY section to take. Pacheco heads it clear, and Kandji is drowned out by a double-team in midfield. No love for RBNY currently, illustrated by Rojas letting a simple pass bobble up off his shin and out for an LA Galaxy throw. Poor stuff.
36 mins: The Red Bulls are just awful. Shockingly awful. Can they just delete the team and start over again? Bring back the Metrostars! Tony Meola!
37 mins: Coach Osorio should just put 6 at the back in order to relieve some embarrassment of his statues in midfield. Beckham comes inside and plays a swanky no-look pass to Eskandarian, who jogs some 30 yards before shooting and shaving some metal off the top of the crossbar with his effort. Can anyone on that Red Bull squad close a man down? Some positively USA v. Italy defending there. Donovan must be having deja vu.
Then, mild excitement at the other end as Kandji just misses out on a low cross by Hall from the right. And Bretos needs to learn to control himself because WE CANNOT HEAR WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DESCRIBE IF YOU ARE YELLING INTO THE MICROPHONE THAT YOU'RE HOLDING LESS THAN AN INCH FROM YOUR MOUTH.
40 mins: Donovan's toying with RBNY down the right, eluding a couple of challenges before Petke lowers the boom and nicks possession. Free-kick anyways on the right side. Duh Becks to take, but it's headed away by Sassano.
42 mins: Long-distance shooting for all! All of it rubbish, too. Kandji is trying to spark something for the home side, but he's one man against eleven.
AND A SERIES OF STUNNING SAVES BY RICKETTS! How did Rojas not bury that rebound? Ricketts dives to his right to keep out the initial shot by I-forget-who, but the danger lurks as Rojas is first to the loose ball and somehow rifles his shot right at Ricketts' legs. The goalie's block was enough to turn it around the post. If he'd have passed it a foot to his right, Angel would have had an open goal. When things aren't going your way, they're really not going your way.
44 mins: Sorry, had a Bretos moment there. My apologies. To tone down the hyperbole, Ricketts made two wonderful saves in quick succession.
GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL from absolutely nothing! And my score prediction from the pregame looks positively prescient! Landon Donovan gets the ball on the right, loops it across the edge of the box to a wide-open Eddie Lewis on the left side, and he volleys low, beating Cepero with the awkward bounce. Simply easy stuff for the Galaxy, and it's all coming from Donovan, really. Becks must feel great, both to be winning but also to be playing second fiddle for the night. NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 3
HALF TIME: NY Red Bulls 0, LA Galaxy 3
Just about everything going the Hollywood way so far. The Galaxy looked relatively untroubled at the back, though the Red Bulls should have scored late on via Rojas. Beckham and Donovan are so gonna hug in the dressing room, and it's the mouthy American leading the charge on the pitch.
Now to go draw the winner of that Grant Wahl book a few people here and there have been talking about! Back shortly!
Drum Roll..... The winner of a copy of The Beckham Experiment as chosen at random is.... Kopper! Email us at the address so we can match you up with your prize. Sorry Goat. We will have another competition soon-ish, with more books to give away!
Re: this game... full-time can't come soon enough.
And we're back!
This is really the first time this season the LA Galaxy scored more than two goals in a game? Amazing.
46 mins: Buddle gets bundled over by Hall, giving Beckham a free-kick 20-odd yards out. He curls it into the box, it bobbles around a bit, it's knocked over for a corner.
Becks pumps it to the far post, and Donovan's wide open. Brimming with confidence, he cracks a volley but it's always spinning wide.
49 mins: Angel wins a free kick in typical Angel, hustle/bustle style. Kandji heads for goal from the cross, but it's never threatening Ricketts.
50 mins: The color commentator hints that comebacks are possible from 3-0 down, and he namechecks Liverpool v. Milan in 2004/05. Then he has the sense to correct himself, saying that the NY Red Bulls are not exactly Liverpool.
Corners corners corners for the Red Bulls, but nothing doing.
52 mins: Another free-kick for LA in the midfield, an area they've absolutely dominated. Oh, and I missed a wicked volley from Rojas a few minutes ago that gave Ricketts a scare. Aside from that shot, Rojas has been crap today. Same for Delagarza, Zimmerman and Petke/Stammler.
Seeing a banner on the sideline reminded me: how on earth did the Red Bulls make the MLS Cup final last year?
54 mins: Anything else on TV right now?
As much as it pains me to say, Donovan's been superb tonight. Energetic, always looking to get involved, never afraid to track back, and dangerous moving forward. He's the USA's Rooney, who in turn is the English Dirk Kuyt, much like Ji-Sung Park is the South Korean Kuyt. Conversely, Beckham's been quiet and subdued but has done his part when asked. As I thought, he's been good from the dead ball but very little else. Not mailing it in already, surely.
@The Fan's Attic -- sadly, not really if I remember correctly. People came out to witness the circus, and have done so with little vitriol. The odd smattering of boos and hisses when he's over in their section to take corners, but that's about it.
I do rate Mo Kandji though. Good workrate, decent enough trickery in possession, and fast. Would do well in the Colaship. Menacing not just because of his stature, but because he can play the ball well.
59 mins: The game is lulling, but you wouldn't know it from the crowd who are still in full song. USL liveblog tomorrow night. Anyone interested?
@The NY Kid -- no clue. I'm assuming he'd cry off anyway.
Angel wins another corner for RBNY, it's wasted, but then a lovely deep cross from the left lands on Celades' head, but he can only guide it right into Ricketts' stomach. Good chance, that.
@The NY Kid -- careful, people will think you're weird for answering your own question there.
62 mins: Lovely link-up play by Donovan and Eskandarian, but the final pass isn't there and RBNY clear.
Sub for the Red Bulls: Celades off, Dane Richards on.
64 mins: Corner for LA as Buddle bedazzles Petke before the defender regains awareness and toe-pokes it away. Eddie Lewis whips the inswinger into the crowd, but Donovan pushes with too much gusto and concedes a free-kick.
66 mins: Angel is flustered again, as his hard work and industry is squandered by a team-mate. It's sub Dane Richards' turn to disappoint, straying offside to receive Angel's pass following a lovely spin off his marker.
68 mins: The Galaxy are content to let RBNY pass it from side to side without really moving forward or threatening. The Galaxy counter with Donovan (he's everywhere!), who releases Buddle on the right side of the box. His thunderous shot is blocked by Cepero (I'm surprised it didn't kill him, unless the balls are a bit flat and thus making more noise than they should) for a corner, and Buddle can't get on the end of Klein's deep cross.
Sub for LA: Beckham off, Birchall on. Mixture of boos and cheers, few drinks containers hurled in his direction as he trots off, clapping and smiling all the way. He then salutes the crowd from the bench. Always playing the PR game. Always looking for photo ops. The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced Beckham is just some soccer-playing Manchurian Candidate.
71 mins: Sub for NY: Zimmerman off, Ubiparipovic on.
An LA counter gives Eskandarian a great shooting chance, but it's right at Cepero. Lovely one-touch soccer by the Galaxy moving forward. Before that, Ricketts came a mile off his line for some reason but is beaten to the ball by Richards, who twists and turns but can't shoot through all the bodies.
Another sub for LA: Eskandarian off, Magee on.
75 mins: RBNY again shoot themselves in the foot, ruining some great positive build-up by wandering offside. Lazy. I was just about to note how they have been a little unlucky with this scoreline having created some golden scoring chances. Then again, they also defend about as well as the French, so I can't show too much pity.
Angel tries to get a good position on a cross from the right, but he's swarmed by three Galaxy defenders. The guy gets no help whatsoever.
78 mins: Bretos allows himself to indulge in some gooey, dreamy-eyed fantasies about what might happen if the Galaxy win all of MLS and every MLS anything ever, and whether it'd be enough to convince Beckham to stay. Short Answer: No. England won't pick him from all the way over here.
Sub for RBNY: Kandji off, Wolyniec on.
83 mins: Bretos is talking about Argentine soccer. Yet another league, MLS included, that Bretos knows nothing about. He just likes to roll his 'r's when pronouncing all those team names. Douche.
84 mins: The live-action equivalent of this at the moment:
86 mins:
Spoke too soon! Wolyniec taps it in with Ricketts beaten, but the ref calls it back for a handball by Gonzalez and demands RBNY take a penalty instead! Let's hope they miss! It'd be hilarious!
87 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL, and a rare smile for Juan Pablo Angel tonight. He sends Ricketts the wrong way on the penalty. And I'm thoroughly pissed that my score prediction is now incorrect. NY Red Bulls 1, LA Galaxy 3
89 mins: As you were, folks. It's been a rather quiet second half, which was to be expected. The dream return for Beckham, because people tend to gloss over the backstabbing, doublespeak and general lack of commitment when the team is winning.
90 mins + 1: ANOTHER PENALTY FOR THE RED BULLS! BUT ANGEL MISSES IT! Gonzalez commits another handball in the box, but Angel rushes his take and Ricketts gets enough on it to kiss it off the post and back into his arms. Absolutely hilarious way to end this game.
FULL TIME: NY Red Bulls 1, LA Galaxy 3
Wonderful stuff for LA, who were aided by a monstrous effort from Donovan, and some sharp counter-attacking, in their win. Becks and Donovan share a split-second loose embrace after the whistle, and maybe it'll be all smiles at the Home Depot Center from now on.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
MLS Liveblog: NY Red Bulls v. LA Galaxy
T-Minus 2 Hours
Until the fun at Giants Stadium. Join me for a liveblog, won't you? The beer is cold, the chips and pretzels are all kinda neatly arranged in bowls to keep them separate (hate snack-mixing), and the TV is ready and equipped with a brand-new Bretos Filter to tune out the inanity.
I'll be here from 7.45 to follow along tonight's MLS tilt between RBNY and LAG, thus concluding our MLS coverage until next season.
Oh, and I'll generate some fake suspense in announcing the winner of that Grant Wahl book at halftime. Catch the excitement! Who will get a book for free!?!? WHO WILL IT BE!??!?!
Thursday, March 19, 2009
NY Red Bull v. Seattle Sounders: Your MLS Liveblog
The 2009 MLS season kicks off (get it?) with last year's suprise contender, the NY Red Bull, against this year's publicity darling, the expansion franchise Seattle Sounders FC. The latter are under the direction of new gaffer Sigi Schmid, who lead the Columbus Crew to the MLS title last year. They make their entrance in a big way tonight, with a sold-out Qwest Field and a highlighted match on ESPN2 (available in HD!). Unfortunately, this match also goes up against 4 first-round matchups from March Madness (although odds are good that 2 of those games will be done before kick-off). Loopy from too much basketball today? Join in down below!
Seattle come into this match with a bit of uncertainty about their squad. Vagenas (stop giggling) is out, while Ljunberg and Zakuani are questionable. Luckily for them, Montero is back from South America after clearing up his visa issues. NY, on the other hand, come into the match at full strength, minus back-up keeper Conway due to his suspension for a substance abuse violation which keeps him out until April 11th.
The expected line-up for Seattle is:
GK - Keller
DEF - Riley; Ianni; Marshall; Sturgis
MID - King; Evans; Alonso
ST - Montero; Jaqua; Le Toux
The expected line-up for NY is:
GK - Cepero
DEF - Goldthwaite; Petke; Mendes
MID - Hall; Ubiparipovic; Sassano; Richards; Rojas
ST - Kandji; Angel
20 minutes until kick-off, and neither ESPN nor MSLnet have the actual starting line-ups. Glad to see that they are on the ball.
O/U on Drew Carey appearances: 7
O/U on Drew Magary appearances: 1
So, given his recent smack-talk, what is the projected beatdown that the Galaxy put on the Sounder in their first match?
5 minutes until kick-off, and ESPN and MLSnet still don't have the starting line-ups. Way to promote the game!
Everyone hold on - I am going to liveblog this match on Facebook, using Twitter, through my cell phone.
So, if this NIT game goes to overtime, the MLS match gets screwed, right?
Audio cut to Stoner, who tells the NIT game to Hurry The Fuck Up!
OK, we officially have:
Red Bull NY
1 - Danny Cepero (GK)
2 - Kevin Goldthwaite
4 - Carlos Mendes
8 - Sinisa Ubiparipovic
9 - Juan Pablo Angel
10 - Macoumba Kandji
12 - Mike Petke
13 - Jorge Rojas
19 - Dane Richards
23 - Juan Pietravallo
27 - Andrew Boyens
Seattle Sounders:
18 - Kasey Keller (GK)
3 - Brad Evans
6 - Osvaldo Alonso
7 - James Riley
9 - Sebastien Le Toux
14 - Tyrone Marshall
17 - Fredy Montero
20 - Zach Scott
21 - Nate Jaqua
23 - Sanna Nyassi
34 - Jhon Kennedy Hurtado
00:00 - Buckle up, kids!
00:00 - First Drew Carey appearance. And, whoa, that's a lot of bright green.
00:00 - Light banter between Stoner and Alexi Lalas, who just doesn't look right with short hair.
00:00 - Oh, good. Let's talk about Beckham some more.
00:01 - And we're off! Finally.
00:40 - Red Bull dominating possession. All 1 minute of it! Ubiparivpovic (Ubi from now on) goes down, but no call. Seattle throw leads to nothing.
02:20 - It has been noted (rightly) that Seattle's kits provide perfect camoflage against the pitch. Perhaps that is why they are missing each other with their passes?
03:20 - Alonso runs over Rojas, who looks like someone just kicked his dog. The resulting free-kick is wasted.
04:30 - First good touch from Montero is well-taken, and he is fouled. This kid could definitely be something special. Ball eventually comes into Cepero, who collects it easily.
06:10 - A Stooge-like pass from Seattle goes out for a NY throw. The ball goes up the line to absolutely nobody. Sloppy on both sides, but Nyassi eventually gets off a shot that Cepero takes easily.
07:20 - Ball comes into to the box to Montero and Petke muffs the first clearance, but manages to get a boot on it and put it out.
08:25 - Ball into Angel, but he is offsides. We travel to the other end where Montero tries to get onto the end of long pass but Petke ushers the ball out for a goal kick.
11:00 - GOAL! Seattle 1-0 Red Bull. The Sounders work the ball well around the top of the box and Montero puts the ball across the goal to the far post. Cepero looked a little lost in goal. Assist from Le Toux.
12:00 - Alonso picks up a YC as he trips Angel at the top of the box. The resulting kick is well over the bar.
14:00 - The ball squirts down the touchline to Nyassi (as the Red Bull defender falls over), but Jaqua puts the shot just wide of the goal.
15:40 - Defensively, NY are looking a little overwhelmed. Their marking is poor, but on the positive side their passing is...poor?
17:20 - NY get a corner kick after Scott (who is looking a little lost himself) can't keep the ball inbounds. The kick goes to the far post and Nyassi puts it out for a throw. The next ball comes into the box but is headed clear.
19:50 - As Nyassi runs past Goldthwaite, the latter reaches out and grabs him for a YC.
21:20 - Kandji, who looks a bit like Drogba, is fouled by Hurtado. The free-kick comes out to Richards who dribbles into the box and then puts it over the endline.
22:00 - Drew Carey sighting #2!
22:35 - Nyassi abuses Goldthwaite again, and gets off a shot, but it is stopped by Cepero.
23:00 - A ball over the top from Le Toux is well-take by Cepero at the edge of the box for the clearance. The ball comes back again and Montero shoots wide.
24:30 - GOAL! Seattle 2-0 Red Bull. Cepero is absolutely abused like a rented mule as Evans receives the ball in the box and nutmegs him.
26:30 - Alonso wins a free-kick after some mild contact and a Pederson-like dive. The kick comes into the box where Cepero takes it after muffing his first touch.
28:40 - Riley receives a ball over the top in the box, but his centering pass is cleared. Seattle is absolutely running roughshod over the Red Bull.
30:06 - Le Toux gets off a shot that is deflected up into Cepero's arms. Surprisingly, he holds on to it.
31:30 - After some extremely poor passing from NY, they luck when the ball hits Murtado in the arm. He gets a YC and the Red Bull get a free-kick at the top of the box. Rojas puts it into the wall.
33:30 - It's Richard Alpert v. John Legend on the pitch!
35:30 - Nyassi is played through and is barely offside. Lucky for Cepero, because the keeper grabbed Nyassi as he shot past him. Oh, and we had Drew Carey sighting #3.
37:20 - Richards goes down as he tries to cross and the ball comes back into his face.
39:00 - I saw better passing last night in the game before mine in my rec league. It was a U-10 girls match.
40:00 - John Harkes says it was a "probing, teasing, ball." He must have spent last night with Lance Armstrong.
41:01 - Corner kick for Seattle taken by Le Toux. He doesn't get it up high enough, and Angel puts it out for a throw. The next ball is cleared out to midfield.
42:30 - Shot from Le Toux goes over the bar. The Frenchman, last year's USL MVP, is looking more comfortable as the match progresses.
43:50 - Throw in deep for NY, and the ball comes in to the box only to be cleared by Le Toux.
44:50 - I do believe that Harkes' favorite word is "suspect", as he has now referred to the passing in this match as "suspect" at least 8 times.
HALF-TIME - Seattle 2-0 Red Bull. NY started well for the first 5-10 minutes, but then the Sounders started to exert control. 3 Drew Carey sightings, and from the look and sound of things, I do believe that "Green Street Hooligans" was given to each member of the crowd as a model for their scarf-wearing, chanting behavior.
Stoner asks Garber his impresison of the first half. Response - "it's what I hoped soccer could be in this country." I hope he's talking about the fan support in Seattle, because the product on the pitch is shite.
Garber's promised revelation doesn't come, as he doesn't specifically state who is getting the next franchise. They promptly show a shot of Portland as Garber says he is moving south for the announcement. Smooth. What a well-kept secret.
SIDE NOTE: I believe that Daniel Negreanu and Phil Ivey have a serious gambling addiction.
QUESTION: Why doesn't the women's NCAA tournament have a play-in game between #64 and #65?
45:00 - Borman on for Ubiporipovic (NY). Boyens had come on for Hall at some point in the first half, but I was napping.
46:30 - A Delap-like throw from Goldthwaite causes some minor confusion, but Seattle clear.
47:50 - Corner from Rojas for NY gets pushed to the top of the box. Shot goes wide.
51:10 - Ball into the box for Seattle and Cepero comes out well for it.
52:38 - some nice work gets the ball to Angel at the top of the box, but Seattle clear all the way out to Le Toux, who was in alone but gets stopped by Hall.
53:30 - Wait! Nate Jaqua is white?
55:05 - Harkes wants Seattle to "tease NY before penetrating." Sick bastard.
57:00 - Oh good. The Sounders fans have started the generic "Ole. Ole, Ole, Ole." chant.
59:20 - Yet another ball into the box for Seattle. It's cleared down the line and the Red Bull force a corner on the counter-attack. The ball is played in to the 6, and Keller takes it easily.
SIDE NOTE: As a GK, I have never once worn long pants. Thus, Kasey Keller is a nancy.
60:30 - Angel plays a nice through-ball, but Kandji is offsides.
62:00 - A very nasty tackle on Angel by Scott, but he gets away without a card. Studs up nasty. The free-kick is cleared by Nyassi.
64:30 - Good work from Seattle, but the ball bounces around in the box and Le Toux gets caught offside.
SIDE NOTE: Bigus would like everyone to know that Harkes is talking out his ass, as he stated that Ljunberg has played as a second striker throughout his career, which Bigus maintains is false.
67:00 - Another YC for the match. I missed who it was to, as I was following Bigus' directions.
67:45 - #1 draft choice Zakuani in for Nyassi.
68:00 - Kandji in on goal and Keller absolutely stones him.
70:00 - A nice ball to the back post from Richards to Angel comes back across the goal and is cleared. The ball eventually winds up to Rojas who gets off a great shot, which Keller barely tips over the bar. The following corner is taken easily by Keller.
71:00 - A Seattle counter leads to Zakuani getting the ball near the spot, but Cepero comes up big to deny him. The corner is taken by Le Toux, but Cepero grabs it.
72:30 - Richards leads with the elbow in going up for a header and Keller takes the resulting free-kick, which goes over the opposite touchline for a goal kick.
SIDE NOTE: u75 also wore pants in goal. He is also nancy.
74:22 - GOAL! Seattle 3-0 Red Bull. Montero gets a brace as he walks the ball up to the top of the box after dispossessing Petke and faking out Cepero.
76:35 - We have to assume that Montero is now on pace to score 132 goals this season.
78:22 - A long pass into the box for Angel is cleared by Riley. The throw goes back down the line and winds up played out by Seattle. Montero gets taken down on the counter, but it's only a throw, rather than a free-kick. Sigi Schmid complains to the 4th official about the tackle, and the center ref comes over to admonish him.
81:00 - The passing from NY has been atrocious throughout most of this match. Goldthwaite and Jaqua get tangled up and roll around on the floor. Harkes informs us that they are fine. WHEW!
81:00 - A nice ball from Le Toux is wasted, as neither Jaqua nor Alonso can get on to the end of it.
83:50 - Richards gets in to the box and then goes down like a geriatric hooker around Wayne Rooney. No PK is given, and he looks dejected.
85:00 - Seattle get even more pressure at the top of the box, and NY are unable to clear. The ball finally trickles out for a Red Bull throw.
87:20 - Another ball into the box from Le Toux, and Cepero does well to get a hand on it and push it clear of danger.
89:00 - Rojas dribbles through half of the Seattle midfield and then crosses wide. NY again fail to do anything with their work and are forced to retreat to midfield.
90:30 - Montero off to a standing ovation for his brace. Levesque comes on in his place.
91:50 - Alonso takes a shot that is well over the crossbar, which Harkes says "is not a bad strike." It's the last touch of the match.
FULL-TIME: Seattle 3-0 Red Bull. Impressive brace from Montero, and Seattle is off to a good start. NY, on the other hand, are shite.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
MLS Cup Liveblog: NY Red Bulls v. Columbus Crew
Well, we're finally here. The jewel in the MLS crown, but will it shine?
No-one expected or wanted the Red Bulls there, but they're ready to play, improbable, impossible. I wonder if the continued success of teams not named LA Galaxy is something that keeps Don Garber awake at night.
Columbus. New York. Let's do this.
LINEUPS:
Columbus Crew: Hesmer; Frankie "Jesus" Hejduk, Padula, Marshall, O'Rourke; Carroll, Gaven, Evans, Rogers; Moreno, Guillermo Most Valuable Schelotto.
NY Red Bulls: Cepero; Leitch, Mendes, Goldthwait, Jimenez; Van den Bergh, Richards, Ubiparipovic, Sassano; Angel, Wolyniec.
Pregame: I am already nauseous thanks to the ungodly amount of alcohol I consumed yesterday, not to mention the goallessness from LFC yesterday that had me overdosing on antacids. Thankfully, MLS and ABC have rewarded my already weak countenance with the tandem of Foudy and Alexei. Despite how funny that Red Bull vid was on Friday, I still can't stand him. It promises to be a long day.
So, thoughts? Scoreline predictions? I'm thinking 2-1 Columbus.
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No Spurs talk, please. We're about to watch a real game of football.
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Before I begin (or rather, before ABC finishes their tepid preamble), I'll throw a couple of things out there:
1. The new Kanye album is good.
2. If Beckham never came back to MLS, they'd be so much better off. All that money could be spread around a bit. Would be nice.
3. Don't ever drink Rittenhouse Rye. EVER. I consumed a lot of it, and now I want to die. PLEASE don't let this liveblog be the death of me.
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As expected, the Red Bull shotgunning wasn't very good. Foudy wouldn't drink it because it might induce labor; shit, it'd do much, much worse damage to your unborn. Maybe a third arm or nipple.
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Subs for both teams. Could the match-winner come from one of this lot?
Columbus Crew: Gruenebaum, Iro, Noonan, Miglioranzi, Ekpo, Hendrickson, Lenhart.
NY Red Bulls: Patterson-Sewell, Magee, Rojas, Cichero, Pietravallo, Boyens, Kandji.
Ready for kick-off. I just threw up a little in my mouth (unrelated observation).
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Harkes is commentating. This makes the pain much, much worse. The more I read match previews, the more I wonder if this will be a rout. Fuck it, Columbus will score 4 today.
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1 min: And we're off! The second kick of the game ends up floating out for a throw-in. Excellent start!
As JP points out, some will root for the best team in MLS, while some will root for the underdog. Fair point; I also reckon a few are rooting for the audio feed to cut out. Long ball down the right that Gaven chases, forcing Cepero out of his box to clear.
3 mins: Looks like a clear strategy already for Columbus: pump the ball down the wings and get round the back. Long ball from Van den Bergh to Angel, although Juan Pablo was offside. I reckon that'll happen 1,000,000 times to Angel today.
Nasty tackle by Chris Leitch, attempting to mangle Robbie Rogers on the left. Ref immediately issues a yellow card, and ABC show a graphic that today's wanker in black, Baldomero Toledo, has given out the most yellow and red cards this season. Not a stat that bodes well for the flow and pace of today's game.
6 mins: Nice work by Ubiparipovic releases Van den Bergh and his awkward running style down the left wing. He runs in a straight line, arms flapping, into space, but his cross was woefully Pennant-esque. Still, Evans heads it out for a corner from which nothing amounts.
8 mins: Both teams struggling to assert themselves early. All the action's on Van den Bergh's wing so far.
As Harkes noted, Schmidt's scarf is a rather nice flourish atop his 60s beat poet outfit. Ubiparipovic floats in a corner from the left that Hesmer leaps out to collect. I wonder if Heurelho is watching and taking notes on how to deal with corners (although to be fair, the lad did keep a clean sheet this morning).
11 mins: Wolyniec wrecks Hejduk from behind but no card. Strange! RBNY have started with a bit more bite.
13 mins: It's Van den Bergh's world, and we're all just living in it. He gets more space down the left and delivers a much better cross. Crew defender slips and it almost breaks for Wolyniec, although Hesmer is just a fraction quicker.
Then, the first real scoring chance: Richards cuts inside on his run and finds Wolyniec alone and 25 yards out. Wolyniec's shot is good but flashes over the bar. Then, Columbus get free on the break and Moreno gets scythed down when almost free on goal. No card, no free kick even.
16 mins: More Van den Bergh! Another free run down the left, and his cross ends up drifting dangerously at the far post. Ball gets knocked down but Hesmer is first to it. Not a bad game so far; both teams are showing some enterprise moving forward.
Holy shit, a Pedro Gomez sighting! Poor guy -- when Bonds disappeared from public view, Gomez disappeared from ESPN. So it goes; yet another reason to hate Bonds... he robbed us of the wide-eyed charm and salt-and-pepper hair of Mr. Gomez.
18 mins: Van den Bergh again! He sticks a corner right into the thick of the 6-yard box. Goldthwait gets a flick on it but it fizzes wide of the back post. Dangerous.
21 mins: More RBNY pressure. They've looked good so far; typical shit by Columbus. As soon as I throw my support behind an MLS team, they repay me by playing cautious, sloppy football.
22 mins: Richards is doing a great Van den Bergh impression at the moment, tearing down the right wing and delivering a decent cross that takes a deflection on its way back out. Close to a goal, certainly. They deserve a goal at this point, and honestly, so do we.
25 mins: Gino Padula is down with the dreaded self-injury, hurting his leg when he turned around. Defending the might of Juan Pablo is clearly hazardous to your health. He limps off the field for further review.
27 mins: A chance for Columbus! Good interplay on the edge of the box by Moreno and Schelotto breaks to Gaven, whose shot ends up comfortably in Cepero's gloves. They then repeat the play on the opposite side of the box. Decent efforts, but both right at Cepero. Bit easy for the keeper, really.
29 mins: Nice throughball for Angel right up the middle, but he doesn't have the pace to finish and O'Rourke recovers. Then Van den Bergh, continuing his epic performance thus far, cuts another sharp opening for Richards on the left. His cross is good, but Angel's half-volley ends up well over the bar.
31 mins: GOAL GOAL GOAL!!! Van den Bergh makes an error, and Columbus score on the break. VDB was complacent with the ball trickling out for a throw-in, allowing Schelotto to pick his pocket and keep the ball in play. Schelotto's pass down the right wing leaves Moreno with lots to do, but no matter; he runs at Jimenez, beats him on the outside and fires a low, sharp shot past Cepero and inside the far post. Cepero should have done better; the angle was tight enough already for Moreno from the edge of the box, but he still found the net. Excellent finish, and Schmidt is mobbed by grizzly people on the sideline. NY Red Bulls 0, Columbus Crew 1
36 mins: Columbus have some confidence now and are streaming forward with gusto. They win a couple of corners that Cepero deals with, and Marshall gives Rogers a chance to shoot moments later but it's blocked by Mendes and (I think) Richards. Dave Van den Bergh hasn't touched the ball since the goal. That might be the problem.
39 mins: It's modified long ball from Columbus! Simple, yet effective. Marshall and Rogers are finding plenty of space but aren't causing Cepero any trouble. RBNY win a corner thanks to Angel's industriousness on the left, but to no avail.
The Crew fans are doing their modified White Stripes song. Wonderful. The aural assault coincides with another chance for RBNY: Van den Bergh gets some space to shoot but puts it well over.
Fat, middle-aged men LOVE facepaints a lot more than they might let on. Especially those rotund Crew fans. It's also nice to see them getting off-the-clock use from their hardhats. Hejduk tries to milk a foul on the wing but the linesman isn't buying it. Crew are pouring pressure down the right side now, as Jimenez clearly isn't up to the task of handling Hejduk, Moreno (saw how well it worked the first time, didn't we?), Rogers, Schelotto... heck, even Schmidt could beat him, I reckon.
Free kick from the right (thanks to a Jimenez foul, go figure) ends up in Cepero's hands.
44 mins: We're winding down to half-time, and both teams seem to be as well. Rather subdued since the goal. Angel's ball over the top gives Sassano something to run and chase, but Hesmer gathers. From the goal kick Moreno gets space thanks to Jimenez' rather lax defending and he tries for goal, forcing a diving save by Cepero. Not nearly as exciting as it sounds. Cepero did dive, but it was a lazy, almost slow-mo dive, the kind you'd pull when getting back into bed after a 4.30am trip to the bathroom.
HALF-TIME, Blessed half-time: NY Red Bulls 0, Columbus Crew 1. I'm off to the bathroom, because Julie Foudy's sure-to-be-awful halftime analysis can't follow me in there. Refuge is sweet.
53 mins: Shit... just got off the phone. What did I miss? Just two goals. Crap. Marshall's goal was excellent, and my pre-game score prediction looks horribly accurate.
The game is much more frantic now. This is a good thing; when the teams start rushing around like they're 8 years old playing on some team with a name like the Dolphins or the Pirates, this can only benefit us more than anything else. Naturally, Columbus are enjoying far more possession and time down near the RBNY penalty area.
Sorry guys. It wasn't the bathroom; I was on the phone.
56 mins: Richards shows a flash of brilliance, sprinting clear down the right and firing a shot right down Hesmer's throat. There was venom behind the effort, but right at the goalie. Easy, really.
58 mins: The game is bright again! Funny what a couple of goals in quick succession will do.
61 mins: Keith, you're dead right about the commentators. The fact that Harkes has taken it upon himself to literally describe anything in sight is really grating. Snide comments about the colour of the ref's shirt don't win you any friends, Mr. Harkes. Your voice is like poison.
63 mins: RBNY try the Rory Delap route, creating havoc with a long throw, but no such luck. They pour forward again, but a lofty, looping cross from the right (think it was Sassano?) drifts out for a goal kick. Bit rubbish, really.
All the play at the moment is in the middle third as both teams struggle to string more than a couple of passes together successfully. Figures that when I put the phone down, the game becomes much less compelling. Should I leave again?
Handball by Schelotto gives RBNY a free-kick about 35 yards out and central. What will they manage?
Answer? A long, driven shot that flies comfortably over the bar. Poor effort, especially when they looked to be organizing a set piece. All smoke and mirrors from RBNY.
68 mins: Dave Van den Bergh is now playing just like Dave Van den Bergh normally does, and it's a shame. Padula gets a yellow for rearranging Richards' achilles from behind. Free kick for RBNY wide on the right. Van den Bergh is ready to strike.
Decent inswinging cross from Van den Bergh, although Hesmer easily navigates a path to the ball to punch it clear. Subs a-plenty are warming up for both teams, which is more exciting than anything at this point. Are we experiencing one of those long lulls that Spectator and Precious Roy talked about in those comments below? Quite probably.
72 mins: Very disjointed play at the moment, not becoming of the MLS Cup. Perhaps having someone other than RBNY in the game might have helped? To be fair, Columbus have been rather tepid as well.
77 mins: Almost 3-1! A great run by Moreno down the left leaves the middle wide open, and he finds Schelotto with acres of room to shoot. He does, and it rattles the bar and out to safety.
I'm amazed there have been no subs yet for either side. You mean to tell me a set or two of fresh legs wouldn't improve this game?
79 mins: Of course, immediately my prayers are answered: Rojas on for RBNY, replacing Luke "Vidal" Sassano.
81 mins: Nothing of note. Marshall wastes a free-kick by putting it straight in Cepero's hands, and I lament that just when I came back, everyone in the comments left!
GOAL GOAL GOAL!!!! A scrappy build-up on the edge of the box breaks to Schelotto, who lofts a sublime pass over the top to Frankie Hejduk who continued his run. It lands right on Hejduk's head, and he dinks it over Cepero before beginning his celebrations. Brilliant goal, conjured by the MVP from absolutely nothing. NY Red Bulls 1, Columbus Crew 3
RBNY respond with another substitution: Kandji on, Wolyniec off.
86 mins: RBNY are trying to apply pressure, but they seem to have no idea how. They're too busy passing it around at the back to threaten.
Nice move forward by RBNY ends with Angel and Hejduk colliding in the box. Looked like a bit of a dive as Angel looks for a penalty.
88 mins: The game is trickling away, and RBNY can't be too disappointed by this comprehensive defeat. They should be thankful to get this far, but really, based on today's performance, they haven't shown nearly enough to warrant stealing the MLS Cup from the league's best team. If they were going to win, it was always going to be a smash-and-grab.
RBNY's efforts to find a goal seems to revolve around letting the Crew have all the possession. Gaven beats the offside trap down the right wing and canters towards goal, but Cepero deflects his speculative shot out for a corner. We've reached the 90-min mark, Schmidt prepares a couple of time-wasting subs with some redundant orders (how complex could it be? "Hey guys, 3 mins of stoppage time left, here's what you need to do to help protect our 2-goal lead").
Andy Iro on, Schelotto off for the curtain call. The crowd gives him exactly that. Only one or two shots for the MVP today, but we know it's his passing that gets him the accolades. Two assists today (I feel dirty talking about assists in soccer, it doesn't feel right) and a good, tidy performance.
90+2 mins: Leitch gets free down the right and finds Kandji, who lays it off for Ubiparipovic for a clean shot. He responds by blasting the ball into the side netting from 10 yards out. That could have made things interesting.
Columbus immediately hurry another important sub on: Steven Lenhart relieves Eddie Gaven. Seconds left.
THERE IT IS. Fulltime: NY Red Bulls 1, Columbus Crew 3. A deserved result. The celebrations begin, and I celebrate at home because now I can stop listening to John Harkes.
Thanks for joining the fun today; despite the lulls, this was a lot better than watching that Sunderland game this morning. Frankie Hejduk is very, very excited.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Pop Quiz, Hot Shot!
Why in the name of Tony Meola are the NEW YORK Red Bulls playing in SALT LAKE CITY tomorrow night for the WESTERN CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP??!?!?
Shoot the hostage, Keanu, I can't take it anymore! Seriously, we here at UF do our best to boost MLS. We're no pimps-- in the footy sense-- but everyone here wants the league to do well.
Give us the chance, we'll be out there singing. "Hey Hey, J! P! A! How many goals didja score today!?" But over and over, the league pushes sitters over the bar. And never in such glaring fashion as today.
Let me explain.
OK. This is how MLS Cup playoff qualification works. (Thanks, wiki!)Eight teams will make the playoffs - the top three teams in each conference plus the remaining two teams, regardless of conference, that have the most points in the standings upon the completion of the 30-game regular season.
The seeding is as follows[1]:
* The top three teams in each conference qualify and are seeded 1, 2 & 3 in their respective four-team playoff conference brackets.
* The two MLS teams with the next most points, regardless of conference, receive "wildcard" berths.
- The two wild card teams will be seeded according to conference first.
- If more than four teams qualify from one conference, the team finishing lower than fourth in its conference will shift over to the other conference bracket.
- A team switching conference brackets will be seeded below all other teams in its new conference playoff bracket.
Please consult with a quantum physician if you couldn't follow the above explanation. It's the simplest I could find.
So having played out this counterintuitive mess, the Red Bulls qualified for the playoffs despite finishing 5th in the Eastern Conference. They were shuttled into the Western bracket for what was sure to be a fierce mollywhoping at the feet of the two-time defending champion Houston Dynamo.
But then something funky happened. The Red Bulls started kicking ass. They should have beat Houston in the first leg of their q-final home & home, instead settling for a 1-1 draw. In the second leg, in front of a record crowd in Houston, they won. I mean they really stomped the fuckers-- 3-0 and it wasn't that close.
New Yorkers poured into the streets! People were climbing lampposts, hugging and kissing strangers, screaming the name of hat trick hero Barack Obama!!
So, after this epic victory, what next? The lads return home? We wait for them on the tarmac? Flood to MLS.com for tickets to the semi-final?
Nice to think so.
The fact of the matter is that there will be no return trip home. The Red Bulls go directly to Salt Lake City for a one-off conference title game tomorrow night. If they win again-- which could, like, totally happen-- they'd be crowned what? I'll tell you what: Western Conference Champions. (the upside: Bulls win and kids all over the third world get new t-shirts! Yele Haiti!)
In the end, this convoluted set-up would have the underdog Bulls traveling to Carson, Calif., for a potential Cup final. The lone New York franchise in America's premier (chuckles...) soccer league could win a championship... and give the fan pool ZERO chance to jump on the bandwagon. It's one thing for the Giants to win three on the road then head off to the Super Bowl. They have a 20-year waitlist for season tickets. The Red Bulls average... what?... 12,000 a game? What a waste. GRRRRR!!!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Eh, why not, a spot of liveblog: NY Red Bulls v. Columbus Crew
I've been watching this game and rather enjoying it, so I thought a little 2nd half liveblog wouldn't be a bad thing. For someone who is always ragging on MLS, I've had fun with this one.
Good attacking football from both sides, and the tempo is high.
I just feel like the one thing they're all missing is that last pass through en route to goal. The final delivery is sloppy, but it'll come in time. Thus, you end up getting guys shooting from range without much menace (except for Angel, whose free-kick was beastly), or you get a lot of goals scored via the old Fifa '98 route: cross from the touchline, get a tap-in or a header from the edge of the 6-yard box.
Maybe I'm wrong. Either way, it's been a good 'un so far. 1-1 at halftime, and they're getting ready to come back...
Follow along if you're around, after the jump.
Starting XIs:
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New York Red Bulls:
18 - Jon Conway (GK)
2 - Kevin Goldthwaite
6 - Seth Stammler
7 - Mike Magee
9 - Juan Pablo Angel
13 - Jorge Rojas
17 - Gabriel Cichero
19 - Dane Richards
23 - Juan Pietravallo
27 - Andrew Boyens
60 - Jeff Parke
Subs:
1 - Danny Cepero (GK)
4 - Carlos Mendes
8 - Sinisa Ubiparipovic
12 - Danleigh Borman
15 - John Wolyniec
32 - Luke Sassano
33 - Chris Leitch
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Columbus Crew:
1 - William Hesmer (GK)
2 - Frankie Hejduk
4 - Gino Padula
5 - Danny O'Rourke
10 - Alejandro Moreno
11 - Pat Noonan
12 - Eddie Gaven
14 - Chad Marshall
15 - Stefani Miglioranzi (replaced by Ekpo, 20")
16 - Brian Carroll
19 - Robbie Rogers
Subs:
18 - Kenny Schoeni (GK)
6 - Andy Iro
8 - Duncan Oughton
9 - Jason Garey
17 - Emmanuel Ekpo 20
23 - Ezra Hendrickson
32 - Steven Lenhart
And we're off.
46 mins:
Holy shit... that didn't take long. GOAL COLUMBUS... Robby Rogers, who caused a lot of problems on the left wing, takes the ball with pace and cuts infield, letting fly from 30 yards and sending the ball soaring past Jon Conway.
New York Red Bulls 1, Columbus 2
50 mins:
Rogers and Eddie Gaven are causing nightmares on the flanks for RBNY. Rogers ghosts past Cichero on the left, and the Venezuelan defender decides to stonewall him and send him flying. The crowd wants a penalty; the ref gives it where he should have given it, just outside. Rogers floats it in but Conway collects easily.
Conway's been rather pants tonight. Caught way out of position on goal #1, arguably on goal #2 as well, and just hasn't looked up for it tonight.
Moreno collects it outside the box dead center and decides to rip a shot with Boyens in his face... narrowly wide.
Sub for RBNY: Woljniec in, Pietravallo out. The salt-and-pepper hair atop the sub is rather hilarious to look at.
Other players who have looked good: Ekpo for Columbus (fast as shit but can't play a good final pass!) and Dane Richards, another lad who is faster than the proverbial speeding bullet but whose passing has the accuracy of a shotgun at long range.
55 mins:
LA Galaxy haven't won since Arena took over? I'm not surprised. Meanwhile, RBNY struggle to have any possession whatsoever. Moreno feeds Ekpo at the edge of the box, his thunderous shot is blocked and loops high and harmlessly towards the touchline. Conway canters across to collect under no pressure, but misjudges it and it dinks off him for a corner.
Corner doesn't amount to much, although the clearance is weak, and when Gaven gets it in the box again, his shot is rather weak and smothered easily.
57 mins:
RBNY cough it up again cheaply in midfield, and Brian Carroll jogs towards goal and shoots from 35 yards. It loops wide. What is with all this long-range shooting? A lot easier to score if you're close.
60 mins:
Harkes (I think it's Harkes) posits that the way to mark Juan Pablo Angel out of the game is to put two on him; one right in front of him to stop him shooting, and one right behind him to stop him getting the ball. Is he suggesting JPA might enjoy being the Lucky Pierre?
I wish I didn't now have that imagery. Damn you, Harkes. NIGHTMARE FUEL.
61 mins:
The RBNY defensive third of the field is beginning to resemble WW2-era Dresden; it is raining possession and chances on poor Conway's goal, leaving their defense looking rather dilapidated. (That's right folks, a tenuous WW2 reference!) The raiding is halted momentarily by a foul on the edge of the box that gives Conway a chance to clear and breathe a little.
62 mins:
Here come Columbus again. Marshall plays Moreno through, and it's a straight sprint to goal. He holds off the last defender, Conway comes out to greet him on the edge of the box, Moreno dinks it past him to the left and then takes a rather ridiculous dive right over Conway's outstretched body. The crowd becomes apoplectic looking for the penalty, but the ref knows best and awards a goal kick.
Moreno knocked it far too long past Conway to sell the ref on the foul, which was dubious at best to begin with.
RBNY have a corner on the right, which they promptly squander by heading well over the bar.
66 mins:
Columbus spending all their time attacking without difficulty down the wings. A weak cross from Gaven is cleared easily, and Rojas sets off for a sunday job through the entire midfield. He gets some 25 yards virtually untouched, and with 4 Crew defenders in front of him and RBNY players trying to make a break, he takes a speculative shot from range. Not far over, either, but leaving his teammates looking rather frustrated.
RBNY attack again down the left, but Goldthwait tosses up a cross to nowhere.
68 mins:
Cynical that from Dane Richards. A RBNY corner is cleared easily, and Rogers breaks up-field. He knocks it past the first man and turns Richards, whose response is to pull on his shirt until he falls down. Yellow card. Columbus take the free-kick quick and break down the right, the cross in finds Gaven who narrowly heads over.
70 mins:
It's Angel's turn to cross to nowhere. Bit more possession finally for RBNY in this second half, but Columbus have threatened to score a boatload of goals so far in this second half. Will their profligacy in front of goal lead to a soft equalizer?
20 minutes left to find out.
71 mins:
Cute trickery from Ekpo in midfield, but his final pass to Moreno trickles harmlessly through to the keeper. Frustrating stuff from someone who is very, very fun to watch.
I missed a substitution 10 mins ago for RBNY: Mike Magee off, Danleigh Borman off.
72 mins:
It's Hesmer's turn to look like Paul Robinson in goal, as a long, lofted free kick into the box catches him in two minds and he's forced to fumble it out for a corner with 2 Red Bulls giving him pressure. It amounts to nothing.
73 mins:
I'm not watching MLS anymore; it's just the Rogers and Gaven Show. Their link-up play is enjoyable, but Columbus aren't doing anything with it. Wojyniec breaks for RBNY down the left flank, but Hejduk distracts him enough to regain possession. Both teams are passing it around neatly for the most part, but it's not adding up to clear-cut chances.
76 mins:
HOW IN THE NAME OF DAVID BECKHAM DID THEY MISS THAT?!?!?!? Gorgeous play by Columbus. Given time to pass it around on the edge of the box from left to right to left again, Rogers chips the defense and Hejduk beats the offside trap. Through one-on-one on Conway, he hits it right into the goalie, and the ensuing scramble breaks to Rogers on the edge of the box. With plenty of space to shoot at, he scuffs it off the outside of his foot, it takes a deflection and Conway smothers the loose ball. Gilt-edged chance for the Crew.
... immediately from that Wolyniec beats the trap from Rojas's smart angled pass, but Hessmer is equal to it. Welcome back, end-to-end football. I've missed you the last 20 minutes.
80 mins:
Both sides are tired, but RBNY are starting to look more threatening. Still, the final pass is lacking. To prove my hypothesis, Rojas has a chance to spring Angel, but his pass is too strong and despite a spirited chase, it rolls out for a Columbus throw-in.
82 mins:
Sub time for Columbus after a lull in the play. Ekpo is off, with defender Danny Iro coming in. Would be awful to drop 2 points after this performance.
Sigi Schmid has another sub ready in the form of Jason Garey. Who's he replacing?
85 mins:
Dane Richards capitalizes on a gaffe to break down the right wing. All alone, he whips in a quick, low cross but it's easily clear. You can sense Angel's frustration from here.
And just like that... Columbus break and SCORE ANOTHER GOAL. Neat, clinical move, too. Hejduk gets through on the right after a neat chip through by Noonan, he races in on goal with the Goldthwaite breathing down his neck, he waits until Conway comes out before passing across for Gaven, who was wide open and slots it into an empty net. Very nicely done indeed.
New York Red Bulls 1, Columbus Crew 3
Just like that they bring on Garey for Noonan, who's had a quiet game. Not much of note from Pat N.
89 mins:
Frustration and petulance emerge from the RBNY side, who are clearly annoyed at the rather lackluster performance they've put in this evening. Rogers (I think) holds the ball near the left-hand corner flag, slowly sucking time off the clock, and Goldthwait decides he's had enough and takes a wild hack at the back of his leg. A long, swinging kick for no reason whatsoever, and the ref's decision is easy. RED CARD FOR GOLDTHWAIT.
Columbus fans cheer, Goldthwait stomps off. Stupid move late in the game.
90+1 mins:
Roll on full time, please. RBNY are just committing stupid, angry fouls and tension is running a little higher at the game winds down. Hejduk has another run down the wing, but it's broken up by Stammler. Less than a minute to go.
90+2 mins:
O'Rourke skies a shot well over, and we're seconds from the whistle.
FULL TIME:
A comfortable, richly-deserved win for Columbus at home despite coughing up the early goal. Rogers and Gaven were a constant menace, and RBNY will now have to deal with a suspension for Goldthwait, the guy with the most mins this season, after his idiotic foul at the death.
Final Score: New York Red Bulls 1, Columbus Crew 3
Decent game, that. MLS is slowly winning me over. Sure, it's no Liverpool, but I need to stop the snobbery when it comes to the US version. Still, I'm adamant that they're lacking the final pass. Too many long-range shots and dribbling into two defenders. Still, a good game.
Now it's time to crack into the scotch and watch Gordon Ramsay berate moronic, ornery failing restauranteurs for an hour.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
The Barcelonas are good at the footballs
While I wasn't able to get my own pictures due to the fact that I was covering the event for two different outlets, I did manage to get more than enough words.
It was a surreal experience dipping into the concrete bowels of the Meadowlands, getting my computer scanned, and then heading up into the hushed corridors of the press box, where some journalists spent more time refreshing the Mets score on their laptops than watching the masterclass unfold beneath them on the crude patchwork turf.
It was a neat reminder of what soccer is fighting with for attention in this country; at least the product on the field was good, wasn't it?
It took the Blaugrana just 24 minutes to canter out to a 3-0 lead, and if it weren't for some schoolyard finishing, they could have gone into halftime with 3 or 4 more. In short, Barcelona were breathtaking, a refreshing contrast to the insipid performances by Everton and West Ham in their own recent US excursions with the new season approaching.
Guardiola put close to a full-strength XI out in the first half, and they ran roughshod over the Red Bulls; Puyol and co were defending on the halfway line as Angel kept getting caught offside with the long ball, and when Barca had the ball, they constantly threatened. Hleb (I hear some UFers booing) was a persistent menace on the right side and worked well with the attack-minded Daniel Alves.
Xavi and Iniesta controlled the midfield with crisp, incisive passing, including Iniesta's perfectly-weighted through ball splitting the defense to give Eto'o the easiest of finishes.
Quick summary of goals:
Barca 1-0 RBNY (Xavi 17") - Alves whipped a cross in from the right, and Xavi met it with a diving header unmarked at the edge of the 6-yard box. Goldthwaite and Parke left him all alone to power it into the top-left corner.
Barca 2-0 RBNY {Eto'o 18") - RBNY lose possession immediately from the restart, Iniesta gathers the ball, advances 10 yards untouched, and threads the ball between Mendes and Parke for Eto'o, who slots it under Conway from the edge of the box.
Barca 3-0 RBNY (Marquez 24") - Short corner on the left from Xavi to Iniesta, and his pacey cross was flicked on by Marquez through Conway's hands. No time to react to the change in direction.
Barca 3-1 RBNY (Stammler 30") - An alarming blunder from Valdes as he let Dave van den Bergh's speculative cross from the left splutter through his hands, giving Stammler the simple tap-in.
Barca 4-1 RBNY (Eto'o 43") - Best goal of the match. Hleb trickery on the right, cuts inside and breezes by two defenders, threads it to Eto'o near the penalty spot. His first touch beats his marker, and with his second, he slides it under the advancing Conway.
HALF-TIME
Barca 4-2 RBNY (Rojas 60") - Another Valdes mistake! Of course he won't be castigated too heavily for it now, but if he's pulling these at the Bernabeu in March, it'll be an entirely different story. A deep, low cross from Parke on the right side skids under his dive, giving Rojas an empty net to drive the ball home.
Barca 5-2 RBNY (Suarez 80") - Puyol, now playing on the wing of all places, pulls a nifty move down the right to feed Suarez for a clinical finish.
Barca 6-2 RBNY (Pedro 85") - Suarez turned provider, beating his man for pace down the right side and cutting the ball back to Pedro on the penalty spot, who curled it inside the right post.
The second half provided a gentler counterpoint to the first as Guardiola made six changes, deputizing all his field marshals with their younger, sprightlier understudies, but the Blaugrana still bossed the tempo of the game even with so many adjustments. Bojan showed flashes of his promise, and Toure Yaya proved more than able in handling the controlling midfield duties. The late Barca goals were more a product of conditioning than inventiveness as the tired Red Bulls team struggled to finish out the game.
The crowd was just a drum-head shy of 40,000 and dominated by Barca fans, and a random count of one corner yielded neutral fans (yes, saw some Chelsea and LFC Torres shirts amid the crowd) than even the Red Bulls faithful. The mind boggles as to why there weren't more! The weather was perfect, and one of the world's best clubs was in town!
Once the whistle mercifully brought the match to a close, we filtered back downstairs into the cavernous corridors at field level and joined in the circus for a while. John Harkes took time away from the air-conditioned microphone room to engage in conversation with cougar-esque groupies, and of course, the obligatory Claudio Reyna sighting just off to the side from the press line. He and Steve Nash were deep in conversation, and it had me wondering: if Nash does put a good chunk of money into MLS somewhere along the line, do you think Reyna will find himself with a swanky job in Nash's organization? It's hard to envision Claudio disappearing from the New York scene, but then again, his retirement wasn't exactly full of happiness and sunshine, was it?
And then, perhaps the most surreal sight of all; Xavi, the tiny Eto'o, and Iniesta, all quickly-showered and anxious to get back on the bus, being frisked and scanned with those metal detector batons that infringe upon you at airports. Even someone's elderly mother was briefly searched and her ID scrutinized as Barcelona tried gamely to head back to the hotel.
I couldn't figure out how this worked: was this the Meadowlands security making sure they didn't steal any memorabilia, or was this Barca security making sure no superfans were able to sneak onto their comfortable coach?
It was a jarring end to the night, but one that made perfect sense. In a way, it was small revenge for the frisking they'd inflicted on the Red Bulls all evening. From there the line for interviews was ponderous and slow, and with all the players and coaches releasing cliches into the night air, it was time to exit.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
I Hinted I Wouldn't Do This
Really, a Toronto FC match is only so entertaining (although, this being the first time I've watched them, I am impressed with their crowd).
But it's the visitor in Juan Pablo Angel who got me thinking...
Yes, Juan Pablo Angel and Henry Rollins were not only separated at birth, they were then separated by a couple of decades.
Maybe this will be a recurring feature after all...
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Red Bull Gives You Sprains!
(Photo: "Crushed" by Kevin Steele)
Red Bull New York is currently on tour in Austria, visiting the parent company's headquarters in Saltzburg, and played a friendly Monday afternoon against the reserve team of its sister club, Red Bull Salzburg Juniors in what the organizers figured would be a spirited kickaround between corporate brothers in arm.But they get that Red Bull in them and they get all antsy in the pantsy. Jack Bell of the New York Times, who traveled with the club characterized the match was chippy and ill-tempered, and RBNY speedster Dane Richards had to leave with a sprained MCL. So it was a good thing we could count on New York captain Claudio Reyna to be diplomatic and even-keeled: Michael Lewis of the Daily News got more quotes from Reyna and other members of the New Jersey contingent. Salzburg beat New York 1-0, but obviously, the big concern for RBNY is the loss of Richards, who is about the team's only source of speed on the right, uh, wiiiing. The club hasn't announced a prognosis, but he will most likely miss the April 5 season opener against Columbus. Kinda makes me glad Jozy Altidore was allowed to skip the Austria trip to prepare for Olympic qualifiers.They’re diving cheats,” Reyna said, not mincing words. “The referee lost control, and I told him in German that he had to do a better job. For us, it was really just an exercise and the object was not to get injured. We were just trying to get a game and they were playing like it’s the World Cup.
Nevermind.
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