Saturday, December 20, 2008

Shooting from the Ip... Ip... Ip!

The Furtive One

Our latest edition of Football Managers Gone Wild takes us to lovely Portaloo Road, home to Ipswich Town FC and, at present, Gentleman Jim Magilton. It's been a rough fortnight for the gaffer. Derby disgrace at bottom-feeding Norwich set the stage for a home loss to Cardiff and now the guy's got himself into a bit of a row with the local scribes (with audio!)

**Warning: We know Joe Kinnear. Joe Kinnear is a friend of ours. Jim Magilton is no Joe Kinnear... though he tries!**

If we're to go by Derek Davis of the East Anglian Times, the tomfoolery began on Thursday, when Gentleman Jim held a closed door meeting with a select eight members of his squad. Magilton reportedly told the group that they would form the nucleus of the club going forward, all the rest be damned. Or sold. The sheep-shagging journalist Davis caught wind of the powwow and by Friday morning it had been reported as fact in the local papers.

Which I brings us to Friday's press conference. It all began innocently enough. The manager gave the latest on injuries and suspensions (among those banned from Saturday's tie: Ben Thatcher. Remember him?) It was all business until the UK Mirror's Elvin King asked if Magilton had any response to Davis's meeting story.

Transcript courtesy of Enjoy! (That girl you hear giggling off yonder is actually our own tittering Bigus)

King: “Have you anything you want to add about the story about the meeting that took place?”

Magilton: “No, nothing at all - absolutely nothing.

“If it is his opinion (pointing at Derek Davis) 'in my opinion' or 'allegedly' you are printing lies.”

Davis tries to ask, "What is a lie?"

Magilton: “Someone has told you that and he is a liar.

Davis: “But people are telling me these things.”

Magilton: “They are lying, he is a liar, he is a liar. If it is your opinion, we had this conversation before, or you say allegedly then I can live with that but you are printing it as fact.”

Davis: “You had that meeting…”

Magilton: “I had a meeting yesterday behind closed doors. I have meetings, personal meetings with my players, it is my job - Shut Up! It is my job to get to know my players as individuals and as a group.

“I had a group yesterday because I had a special friend down, closed the doors, it was behind closed doors no-one else is invited. I do it on a daily basis. End of.

“See you later. End of.”

Magilton goes to walk out

Davis: “Jim don't walk off, come on, sit down…

Magilton: "Fuck off don't you talk to me…”

Magilton then storms out.


This seems like precisely the kind of story that does not go away quickly. Especially after the Blues come out in 3-3-1 for today's match. Unless Magilton is leading the Freemasons revival in East Anglia, there's really no excuse. And even that wouldn't cut it. Secret societies have no place in football, I say. Freemason or not, Magilton does earn a place on UF's forthcoming Football Managers Gone Wild DVD set.

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