The saddest soccer crime ever.

Snake Eyes!

Poor, poor Scotland. I realize that times are tough for the world economy, but with soccer players north of the border in the SPL pulling in a lean $2500 a week (sad, I know), it's no wonder they're lashing out in frustration.

Like Hibernian winger Filipe Morais (the haircut fanatic in the pic above). He's in trouble for using his kicking skills the wrong way at an Edinburgh casino.

From the Beeb:

"He [Morais] got into an argument with Robert Brown on a night out at Maxims casino in York Place on 26 September at about 0530 GMT. Morais, who earns £1,300 a week, has not played for the team since August. Witnesses saw Morais and his companions speaking to Mr Brown and an argument broke out at the casino. Mr Brown was punched in the face and knocked to the ground during a scuffle and Morais kicked his head as he lay on the ground. He suffered a burst nose and a split lip and was treated by the Scottish Ambulance Service."

Not too good, is it? One wonders if it was part of his training while languishing in the reserves.

Seriously though, no good can come of this, although his lawyer, the wonderfully-named George More (the "More" presumably referring to the number of billable hours he's always pushing for), tries hard to spin the incident into something so distressing that heck, if any of us had been in Felipe's boots shoes, we'd have done exactly the same:

"Young footballers are quite often harassed or picked on or spoken to when they go out and my client went out that evening for a drink with a friend. My client kicked out when he was down as an act of frustration because the last part of his evening had been utterly spoiled by these two men. He was immediately regretful that he had done it."

Man, it ain't easy being a footballer. It's all gambling, drinking, and 90 minutes of weekend work. Maybe they were teasing him because his salary seems so tiny?

So, the former Chelsea/MK Dons/Millwall/St. Johnstone player is going to be punished in the wallet, losing $1000 in fines, a further $1600 to the club for being out the night before a match (not exactly the best way to get back into the team), and possibly another two weeks' wages for his off-hours casino kickabout.

No word yet on whether he'll be able to pay his electric bill next month.