Oh dear, poor John Mikel Obi Mikel John John Obi Mikel

Mikel laughs at the crumpled wreckage once known as Phil Neville

Trying frantically to deputize for the injured Michael Essien is enough to drive anyone to drink, and the gargantuan task finally drove poor Mikel John Obi over the limit. Well, he drove his car over the legal limit, and the police did the rest.

From the Guardian:

The 21-year-old Nigerian was stopped by police at 5.30am on Saturday after being seen driving his Range Rover "erratically" near the club's ground in London's Fulham Road. Hours later his team beat Ipswich 3-1 at Stamford Bridge, although Mikel was not part of the match-day squad.

Mikel, who lives in Weybridge, Surrey, and reportedly earns £40,000 a week, has since been charged with driving while over the drink-drive limit and will appear in court in April. He faces a year's driving ban or a jail term if the offence is deemed exceptionally serious.

It's not as awful as the infamous Stevie G/iPod punch-up, but even so. With erratic driving like this, it's no wonder he can't handle the midfield at Stamford Bridge.