Here at Unprofessional Foul we like to think up fun ways for our readers to waste hours and hours consumed in useless pursuits and THAT kind of dedication led me to the creation of the (drum roll) Unprofessional Foul Footy Felons Top Trump game! Get In Bigus!
If you grew up with Top Trumps then you know exactly where this is going. If you didn't? Then click here to see exactly where this is going!
Each week I will issue a UFFFTT card featuring a footballer who has had a brush with the law. Each card will feature stats and once you have collected them all you will have a fabulous new game to play with yer mates, yer mum or good old uncle Frank.
Our Top Trumps are much like the ones you collected as a kid BUT one of our categories is Crime. To beat your opponent with this category, you will need to refer to our Crime Hierarchy Card.
To play UFFFTT, you and your chosen adversary split the pack of cards. To win you call a category. Your value is highest? You win the your opponent's card. The winner continues to select the category until losing a card. Collect all the cards and you are the winner!
To keep the cards just save them and print! Print or mount them on card for the best results. Or use plain old paper and laminate them.
So start collecting here and NOW. Card one is naughty U.S. footballer Roy Lassiter!
U.S footy star Roy Lassiter was arrested in 1995 for Breaking and entering, larceny and fraud. He was issued with a 10-year suspended sentence and served 1 month in jail for his crimes.
Card 2 will be posted next week!
-Bigus
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5 comments:
Sheer Brilliance! Well done.
Wasn't Pele's son convicted of murder? A reserve keeper for Santos, I think....
In the words of Gareth:
I would know what cards you've got immediately just through what cards I've got. I used to play it by myself, with a dummy hand just testing out every different scenario of which cards would beat which other cards for hours, sometimes three or four at a time. But put in the work, the rewards are obvious. So I'd know exactly what card you've got in your hand from what cards I've got and I would know, probability wise, exactly what feature to pick on my card to defeat, statistically, any card that you could have in your hand at that precise moment. You will never win.
[pause]
Could still be fun, though.
Thank f--- Gareth isn't real.
But what I want to know is..has there ever been a boy born who can swim faster than a shark?
Is this like the British version of Pogs or something?
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