Monday, June 22, 2009

Sex With Teens >>>> Payroll Management

Berlusconi: possibly a worse owner than Hicks/Gillett. But with a higher libido.


It's a fun time to be on the squad at AC Milan. You just watched Kaka depart for La Liga, the Beckham circus has left town (perhaps only temporarily, but still) complete with ugly robot wife and annoying entourage, your best defender/player in club history is freshly into retirement, and your owner is an oblivious, aloof, teen-shagging, escort-hiring clown.

In the case of Andrea Pirlo, their 30-year-old irreplaceable midfielder, the 72-year-old Silvio took time to address transfer rumors with this glorious, clueless, brilliant quote: "If there's an offer, it should be considered. We'll see. I was the first to say that he must stay, but then they showed me the sums (for his salary)."

Sure, he's up to his wrinkled, liver-spotted neck in pliable, impressionable bed partners, but he's has to be more in tune with his team, doesn't he? He doesn't even know how much money his players make! Does he even know they sold Kaka? At least Roman Abramovich reads the sports pages from his giant fucking yacht.

Silvio is fast-becoming the world's first silk-pajama'd playboy Head of State/Soccer Team Owner (Kim Jong-Il doesn't count, unless he puts in a bid for Newcastle United), with the tabloids flushed and engorged with stories about lavish naked parties (seriously NSFW!) at various luxury residences, where lots of sex and champagne-quaffing takes place. Given that he's no moviemaker and he's not making a sequel to Eyes Wide Shut, the authorities have been having a poke around in case they could turn the aging debaucherer into their next high-profile trophy in court.

Regardless, it's kinda sad that he has no clue what's going on at his club. Though with his rather attractive procession of bikini-clad excuses, can we really be that mad?

6 comments:

Mike Georger said...

If there were ever a real life version of 'The Duke' from Salo, it's Berlusconi.

Signal to Noise said...

If Berlusconi did not exist, we would have to invent him.

jjf3 said...

I got to see several of Pasolini's films (courtesy of my 2nd-favorite college class), but haven't seen Salo...

Not often you get Pasolini references anywhere...

Mike Georger said...

I'm a sick, sick man.
Some of the scenes in that movie are just vomit inducing. I don't think I could handle it on any sort of narcotic.

jjf3 said...

Having seen the earlier works, and knowing he decided to push every limit he could with Salo, I'm not surprised. I haven't consciously "avoided" it (like you can see it anywhere), but its not something I'm really all that interested in seeing...I know his viewpoint already, I don't need it reinforced that strongly...

Mike Georger said...

Man ... the most NSFW thing in that gallery is a dick, accompanied by what I could only assume is the most ridiculous bush not seen on a bear, or possibly some sort of weird male thong which leaves the genitals revealed.

Damn you to hell, I was expecting a fun NSFW experience.