Love of footballer destroys promising career. Or something.

Alright, if there is one thing I really don't understand about football celebrity culture in England, it's the rise of the WAG. These women--the NASCAR wives of Britain--seem to do very little other than spend the money of their money-making boytoys. Sometimes, though, they do have opportunities to make their own way in life, and summarily turn those opportunities down.

Sorry, ladies. He's taken.

Abbey Clancy, Peter Crouch's girlfriend, announced that she has turned down an opportunity to model in LA, because she can't bear to be apart from Lurch Crouch. Why this made the press, I can't say. Someone made the mistake of asking her, I guess.

All in all, though, I think it's for the best. Sad as it is to say, if she were in LA she would be largely forgotten by the footballing world. Just ask Beckham. Clancy would also lose the attention of Crouch, and there are plenty of Brit women who find his money attractive enough to sleep with him.

Besides, if she were truly going to model in the USA, she would have to move to New York. Any concept of "modeling" based out of LA involves porn, and I sure as hell don't want to see Crouch get mixed up and filmed in that.