These New Kits are Fantastic!

La Federation Francaise de Football annonce aujourd'hui que nous avons...Quoi? Anglais? Mais, pourquoi ils ne parlent pas francais? Sigh. Stupid English-speaking troglodytes. D'accord, en anglais alors.

Join me after the jump for this wonderful announcement about the superiority of French football. Even if you're English. (Les Anglais savent lire?)

Today we have taken a big step in reminding the world that Les Bleus play the best football in the world. (Quoi? Soccer? Ah non, pas ca encore! Les Americains peuvent l'appeller football).

Although we have been sponsored by adidas since 1972, we have never felt comfortable being so closely associated with a German company (Les Allemands sont des imbeciles). So, beginning in 2011 and continuing through the 2017/2018 season, we will be sponsored by Nike. This means that we will retain the adidas national team kits for the 2008 European Championships and the 2010 World Cup (oui, oui, si on y arrive. Ne t'inquete pas).

Adidas did make an attractive offer, but we feel that Nike is the future of French football (mais bien sur c'est beaucoup plus d'argent). We also fielded an offer from Airness, as we looked to support a French company, but their products are better suited to our former colonies.

The Nike deal will pay 320 million Euros ($506 million), which amounts to 42.6 million Euros ($63.4 million) per year. In addition, as a sign of respect for the brilliance that is French football, the deal will also pay 2.5 million Euros ($3.75 million) per year for equipment and additional bonuses for performance in the European Championship and the World Cup (qu'on va gagner, bien sur).

As you can see, this deal is much more favorable than the current 10 million Euros ($15 million) per year that we are making with adidas.

More importantly, this Nike deal represents their greatest investment in any football team, well above the 13 million Euros ($19.25 million) per year that they provide to the Brazil national team (c'est ca l'effet de gagner la Coupe du Monde en 1998 et d'etre en final en 2006).

So, please remember that la Federation Francaise de Football continues to represent the best football in the world (reviens, Titi!) and we are happy that Nike has confirmed our status.

- Michel Platini*

*Not really