Sunday, May 10, 2009

LiveBlog: Tootsie Pop FC v. Blue London Scum

Bendtner may have de-pantsed himself midweek, but it's the Blue Scum doing the de-pantsing today


Which teams got eliminated from the CL this week? Oh right, these two. So there's that displaced rage to feed into the proceedings, as well as the FA Cup semi, although let's not ignore the fact that this game is largely meaningless. It's all about pride, folks!

Let's go!

Lineups:

Tootsie Pop FC: Fabianski, Sagna, Toure, Silvestre, Gibbs, Walcott, Nasri, Song Billong, Diaby, Fabregas, Van Persie.
Subs: Mannone, Denilson, Ramsey, Djourou, Adebayor, Bendtner, Eboue.

Blue London Scum: Cech, Bosingwa, Alex, Terry, Ashley Cole, Essien, Mikel, Lampard, Anelka, Drogba, Malouda.
Subs: Hilario, Ivanovic, Di Santo, Ballack, Kalou, Belletti, Mancienne.

1 min: The Gunners break well with Walcott steaming up the middle like a greyhound and having two cracks at goal, the first blocked before the second ended up in Row ZZ. Bright start.

3 mins: The ball is being knocked around at a fast pace thus far, with Lamps and Anelka trying to break through seconds ago, the move ended by the Frenchman's weighty first touch.

Walcott is caught offside as Arse try to get the ball over the top. It's an interesting tactic, as Chelsea are defending way back and not leaving much room for Gooners to sprint into.

Gibbs's cross is shinned out by Alex for our first corner of the game... Fabregas takes it long, but it's way too long and it dribbles out for a Chelsea goal kick.

6 mins: Walcott wins a corner off Ashley Cole. Young Theo looks a lot more up for it than he did midweek. Nevermind; Cech collects the corner with ease.

At the other end, Gibbs makes a strong tackle and snuffs out some danger down right right wing. Emirates applauds him warmly after the nightmare in the CL. Good confidence boost for the young lad.

Then, in the space of 60 seconds, two great moves by the home side; Nasri runs onto a nice pass dummied and left for him, but he turns Bosingwa too many times and it ends up out for a throw. From the dead ball, the Gooners work it across the pitch from left to right, and a neat pass through the Chelsea backline gives Walcott a sniff at the back post, forcing a punch save from Cech. Van Persie wastes the resulting corner.

Reds definitely looking sharper than the Blues thus far, which is to be expected -- after all, whose CL defeat was more heartbreaking, controversial and bitter?

10 mins: First real attacking move for Chelsea, involving a speculative lofted pass from Lamps to Drogba, but Toure is there to nod it away.

Lamps gets some space 20+ yards out and dead in front, but his shot is always slicing wide.

The two sides are enjoying time on the ball to knock it around (mostly Arsenal), but one suspects it's due to the lack of pressure on either side to win.

GREAT MOVE by Arsenal --- Diaby toepokes wide after a lovely build-up; Nasri spins away from pressure in midfield and sprints on goal. He feeds Walcott wide, and his square pass back into traffic but Diaby can't finish.

Drogba slips at the other end trying to keep the ball in play, prompting more than a few jeers. No displays of rage and/or petulance from the Ivorian. Yet.

15 mins: The Chelsea backline is looking rather drab thus far. Malouda's hair, however, is looking fantastic, dahling.

Silvestre mops up an attempted cross-field release for Anelka, and the Gooners break quickly; Walcott chases down an overhit pass into the left corner and slams it across goal -- no-one there to finish. Ball ends up whizzing in and around the Chelsea goal, but no actual shot to speak of.

Arsenal are playing with the unfettered exuberance of a team with little to lose. If only this game had some fucking meaning or consequence!

18 mins: Just as Lampard begins to exert some calming influence over the midfield, Arsenal break quickly with Diaby down the left. He has Bosingwa on his heels (and in his pocket) all the way back to the edge of the Blues' box, and his low cross reaches all the way to Walcott at the back post... the youngster sidefoots it wide. Excellent chance again for the Gooners.

This game doesn't mean anything for next season's CL, does it? 3rd and 4th place go into the 3rd qualifying round... although Chelsea could keep pace with Liverpool for 2nd and the automatic spot in the group stage.

21 mins: Chelsea grind some passes out, and a lovely move by Drogba to backheel the ball through his marker sets Ashley Cole off on a race towards goal. He squares it for Malouda, but his sidefooted finish is too casual and Gibbs is there to block. Anyone other than the cornrowed Frenchman and it's a goal, me thinks. Arsenal scramble it clear -- Drogba has a chance to shoot from the top of the box, but his curled effort it 1,000 miles wide.

On replay, Malouda didn't even hit it cleanly. Douche.

24 mins: A mildly entertaining game thus far, a bit like Ocean's Twelve in its ability to keep the viewer amused without insulting their intelligence.

Mikel fouls near his own area (as he is often wont to do), giving Fabregas a chance to angle one in. He opts to shoot right into Bosingwa behind the wall, and then the Blues play statues from the rebound; inexplicably, the ball is allowed to bounce in the box, and Diaby shins it wide from close range. Cech is pissed, and rightly so; should be 1-0 Arsenal right now.

27 mins: Fabregas touches Drogba's heel as the Ivorian receives the ball. It was a light touch, a feathery contact to say the least. Drogba tumbles like a Jenga tower missing one too many bricks, and Phil Dowd issues the Spaniard a yellow for his efforts. The free kick is floated in...

... GOAL GOAL GOAL for Chelsea! What a shambles, and completely undeserved. Alex rises to meet Drogba's inch-perfect cross, and his header from 12 yards rattles off the underside of the bar and in. Silvestre didn't bother to leap and disrupt the Brazilian, and Fabianski stood and watched the ball hit the woodwork and fall in.

Shambolic goal -- but I await the fun in the comments! Tootsie Pop FC 0, Blue London Scum 1

Not good for Fourthsenal. Boos echo around the Emirates, and the Reds need to respond quickly.

30 mins: Almost 2-0! Malouda nips in behind Sagna and canters towards goal, but his cross for Drogba is deflected behind for a corner. Lamps bends it in and Fabianski comes out a mile to punch and scramble it clear. He fails, but Arse are lucky as a whistle blows.

32 mins: Dowd ushers Cesc over for an actual foul, as the Spaniard poleaxes Malouda in full sprint and fails to get a toe on the ball. I'm confused; the first foul on Drogba (the first "foul", rather) wasn't card-worthy, but this one certainly was. Dowd preaches leniency, but one more of those and Fabregas will shower early. Lampard is right to question the ref for his inconsistency.

34 mins: That Theo sure is fast, isn't he? A long ball springs him free over Ashley Cole, who's caught ball-watching, but Walcott runs out of steam in the box and Chelsea are able to clear.

36 mins: We're entering a bit of a lull; to continue the Ocean's Twelve, it's that bit in the movie between when they piss off the French bandit and start planning how they're gonna steal that Faberge egg.

But wait! Intrigue! Walcott again gets down the right wing and crosses right across goal but the Gooner in the middle (Diaby?) can't usher it in with a backheel. Just Bolton that, lad, and knee/shin/ankle/waist it into net. Flair has its place, but so does brutality. Finish with some force!

38 mins: Drogba receives some healthy boos when he gets the ball. I wonder why?

GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL... and it's the visitors again! Gooner fans should complain about the pathetic effort of Samir Nasri, who was supposed to be marking Nicolas Anelka there. Absolutely awful. Anelka picks it up miles from goal, has time to control and turn past the frosted-tip traffic cone that is Nasri, sprint some 15 yards and rifle a right-footed shot past Fabianski. Not a single Gooner touched him the entire time.

If there was still a Gilberto Silva at Emirates, Anelka would be hobbling towards early retirement and Arsenal would still be down just 1-0. Such is life. Tootsie Pop FC 0, Blue London Scum 2

42 mins: Arsenal try to free Walcott, the only Gooner giving an effort thus far, down the right again, but he's double-teamed and can't keep possession.

This first 40 has been difficult for the Gooners, showing them in the cold light of day (even though it's summer); when unpressured, they are transcendent in moving forward, but for all their pacy, slight attacking middies, they are awful in tracking back. Sure, the first goal came from a textbook Drogba dive, but you could have made an effort in defending that corner. There's precious little in that midfield that can actually tackle, and in the EPL, such frailty will resign you to 4th place. Sorry, folks, I calls 'em like I sees 'em.

At Anfield our defense might be wobbly, but woe betide the poor soul who wanders into Mascherano's territory looking for some room to skip and stepover.

Somewhere in the middle of my rambling, Malouda could have made it 3-0. Wenger needs to buy some old-fashioned grit for that midfield this off-season. They're a team of supermodels that desperately need some gap-toothed hustle and bustle to keep them grounded. Can Nobby Stiles still play football?

45 mins + 1: Nothing of substance to talk about. Essien finds Malouda in the middle after another breezy run at the Gooner backline. Malouda loses it, but Anelka is there to sidefoot into Fabianski's legs. Decent save, but Anelka should have done better.

HALF TIME: Tootsie Pop FC 0, Blue London Scum 2
At the risk of inciting The NY Kid's ire in the comments, the gap between Arsenal and Spurs won't be twenty points next season. Why? Because Spurs have a defensive midfielder in Palacios who can tackle. And that Jamie O'Hara's good at that too.

Arsenal played well for 25 minutes but couldn't finish. Chelsea played simple footy and are two goals to the good, aided by some defensive generosity from their hosts.

Let's hope for some action in the 2nd half and not a sleepy continuation of the half's final 10 minutes.

CONGRATS TO MIKE GEORGER, UF's favourite resident LFC fan in the sandbox. Well done, sir. You made it!

New name for Arsenal: Tootsie Pop FC (at least until you purchase a quality DM).

Although, that implies a hard exterior. Hmm... back to the drawing board. I mean, you all realize I'm doing this because the game itself is now even more devoid of excitement and intrigue, right?

BRILLIANT! They show Gold Cup teaser commercials, and the first three snippets involve fighting, arguing and shocking tackling. I cannot wait! That's definitely the best way to sell that tournament.

We're off again!

47 mins: Anelka gets behind Mikael Silvestre, but his cross is off-target and the Tootsie Pops clear.

GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL... Kolo Toure swallows a bullet for his team, and that just sucks. A lovely outside-of-the-foot ball by Ashley Cole gets over the top for Drogba, and Kolo Toure gets in the way of Drogba's cross (something he had to do, really) to turn it into his own net. Fabianski was caught between all the action like a moron. Unlucky, really, but it would have been a tap-in for the Blues had Toure not tried to defend. Tootsie Pop FC 0, Blue London Scum 3

So, in order to keep everyone chatting, let's start seeing some summer shopping lists (best case, and realistic) for all our clubs. Who do you need to succeed next season?

Liverpool could use some decent wing-backs and a second striker. Zhirkov and Villa, please.

50 mins: Van Persie gets behind the Scum backline (though offside not called, whoops), but his low shot is well saved by Cech. Are you taking notes from the other end, Lukas?

54 mins: Walcott's fine, looping cross to the back post finds Nasri, but he can't finish a difficult volley with Essien closing in, and the ball ends up in the stands.

56 mins: The stands are still pretty full as the cameraman takes some time off from the melee to look around. Wenger looks rather pissed off.

Walcott again gets some room down the right -- he's working his arse off, give him credit -- but from the cross, van Persie's shot is deflected out for a corner. Fabregas takes it, but Drogba heads it clear. It comes to Song, who plays a clever chip to the back post where Walcott is free, but he blazes a shot wide of the far post with no defender nearby. He should have buried that.

Toure needlessly gives away a corner. Malouda to swing it in.

Rejoice, Tootsie Pop fans... Bendtner is warming up!

59 mins: The commentator points out that if Arsenal had converted all these chances, it'd be 3-3. What good does it do to say that?

SUB FOR TOOTSIE POP FC: Abou Diaby crawls off, replaced by the pink-booted Dane. Time for him to prove he's the best in the world, then. He just needs to make sure he keeps his pants pulled up while doing so.

61 mins: Drogba spots Fabianski off his line and attempts to chip it over him from 45 yards. Predictably, he misses.

NOTE TO STEVE: Spurs don't steal players from anyone. They are, however, always available to buy back at a steal of a price.

64 mins: Walcott v. Terry. Who would win that sprint? Theo, while contemplating how to elegantly skip past the England regular, is dispossessed by Essien who tracks back. Tracking Back = something Tootsie Pop FC defenders midfielders need to do.

Bosingwa looks shocked he got that Cole cross at the back post; after all, two defenders had chances to clear before it got there. He blitzes the ball over the bar.

67 mins: Sagna avoids going into the book, and Wenger readies to roll the dice with his final 2 substitutions.

Bosingwa cuts in from the wing under little pressure, but his left-footed drive is a thousand miles wide.

FINAL TWO SUBS FOR TOOTSIE POP FC (pray there are no injuries): Theo Walcott and Alex Song off, replaced by Denilson and Emmanuel Adebayor. The lanky/useless striker gets a little bit of the boo-boy action as he saunters onto the pitch. He looks ready to gesticulate and look disgruntled as not receiving possession exactly the way he would like in the final third.

69 mins: Lamps fouls Fabregas in midfield, but the home side do nothing with it. Then Lamps plays a lovely first-time ball out left for Malouda, but he can't cross under pressure and Fabianski smothers the loose ball.

GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL... a possible lifeline for the Tootsie Pops? Lovely cross by Sagna, and Nicklas Bendtner powers over Essien and Bosingwa, directing a fine downward header inside Cech's far post. The striker did very, very well there. Didn't Adebayor used to do stuff like that? Tootsie Pop FC 1, Blue London Scum 3

The Gooners are showing some life now, with Adebayor getting into interesting wide positions and looking to cause menace. Another goal in the next 5-7 minutes would make things very interesting.

Somewhere far, far away, Sir Alex Ferguson is fast asleep, not even bothering to watch.

Lamps blasts a free-kick from 30+ yards way over the bar.

74 mins: Nasri's been largely rubbish today. ANOTHER GOOD CHANCE FOR TOOTSIE POP FC.... another great cross into the heart of the box, and Bendtner powers a header back across goal, forcing a fine diving save by Cech. Van Persie was right behind the Dane, and should have probably been a bit more vocal in calling for that ball. A lot more momentum with the Tootsies now.

Then, a weak shout for a penalty as Adebayor nips behind Bosingwa and tumbles, but it was never going to be called, not even by the moron Phil Dowd.

Toure then levels Malouda with a hip-check as the ball's going out of bounds. Malouda is down, but just a free kick. Some emotion is being shown at Emirates!

SUBSTITUTION FOR THE BLUE LONDON SCUM: The Unibrow Bosingwa departs, replaced by Branislav "I somehow scored TWO goals at Anfield!" Ivanovic.

78 mins: There is still some fight left in this one (like that bit in Ocean's Twelve where they all end up in jail except for Matt Damon and Bernie Mac and the other guy, who plan that whole shenanigan with Julia Roberts acting as Julia Roberts in that Italian hotel), but Tootsie Pop FC need that 2nd goal quickly if there's to be any semblance of excitement.

80 mins: RvP fizzes a free header towards the top corner, but Cech is a giant and catches it easily.

PS. Both teams have had 13 attempts on goal?

A nice link-up down the left with Adebayor setting Fabregas off. The Spaniard gets to the touchline and chips a cross into the middle, but Cech stretches to grab.

82 mins: Bendtner finds Nasri in the box, who steps inside and has his shot blocked out for a corner.

A mess in the middle! The home side can't force it in with defenders everywhere; Toure, Silvestre and Gibbs all have chances to shoot, but it goes over the top.

Coulda been different if it wasn't three defenders trying to force that ball in.

85 mins: There's a surprising amount of excitement in this for a game that's 3-1.

UM, CONTENTIOUS PENALTY DECISION ALERT! Adebayor is through one-on-one with Cech, knocks the ball past the goalie and goes down! Emirates demands blood in the form of a PK! Upon review, Adebayor totally fucking dove. Sorry, Gooners.

GOAL GOAL GOAL GOAL.... that's how you respond. Malouda beats the offside trap and shoots into Fabianski's legs, Anelka hits the post with an empty net (he was a bit offside, no?), but the ball pings into Florent Malouda who bundles it into a still empty net. Some real pinball stuff, and also the final punctuation mark on a weird, wild afternoon. That's the best thing about liveblogging Tootsie Pop FC matches; win, lose or draw, you do get your money's worth. Tootsie Pop FC 1, Blue London Scum 4

SUB FOR BLUE LONDON SCUM: Malouda off, having had a surpringly decent game, and he's replaced by the growling, miserable Kraut, Michael Ballack.

90 mins: Curtains. Close. In Ocean's Twelve, George Clooney and Julia Roberts are smiling and giggling, having double-crossed the French guy. Brad Pitt is kissing his girl on an airplane, and everyone's happy.

Some lazy passing and both teams just killing time. RvP has a shot that's blocked, and the Blue London Scum knock it about a bit having calmly cleared their lines.


FULL TIME: Tootsie Pop FC 1, Blue London Scum 4
Not much to cheer about if you like Wenger and the youth/flair/potential, etc. Their midfield is shockingly soft when not in possession. Hiddink brought his men well-prepared, and the result is deserved. Maybe the 4th wasn't, but the margin of victory is a fair representation of the gulf between the two sides today.

Thanks for making this entertaining in the comments. I should liveblog the Gooners more often.

What have we learned?
- Buy some fucking midfielders that can tackle
- Ocean's Twelve is a decent flick, though not legendary
- Adebayor is a filthy diver

189 comments:

Autoglass said...

First! A big Chelsea win at the Emirates will do great things for my mood. A loss, OTOH, won't matter a bit, now will it...

The NY Kid said...

The only thing douchier than making a "First" comment on your own blog is being Ashley Cole.

Precious Roy said...

From your comment in the other thread... Yeah, I was just thinking that I barely care about this match because it's essentially meaningless.

EbullientFatalist said...

Found you!

The Fan's Attic said...

so Almunia's hurt?

EbullientFatalist said...

Theo is trying to lob Cech. Not sure that's the best strategy.

TFA: Its amazing how comfortable I've become with Almunia between the posts. Too many years of Lehmann will do that to someone.

Precious Roy said...

Sand in the vag?

I think Wenger knows that third is a long shot even with a win today, so he's going to give some people a run out.

EbullientFatalist said...

Lampard's Adam's apple has its own gravitational pull.

The NY Kid said...

You're probably right, but having Manon Rheaume as our backup GK seems a little risky

Autoglass said...

TV Commenter (who is it?), discussing Arsenal's chances in Europe next year..."Arsenal have to like their chances in any match in which they can avoid the Big Three."

Tee hee hee...

Precious Roy said...

Wonderful metaphor for Arsenal's season right there... Actually for it to be perfect, someone would have gone down injured on the play.

Jacob said...

The start of this game is a nice antidote to the CL horrorshows that both of these teams put up.

Unknown said...

morning all.

given his comments today, any chance Tevez joins Spurs?

Precious Roy said...

ü75: Agreed. Maybe if someone had told Hiddink this is essentially the third place Champions League match he might be parking the bus again.

EbullientFatalist said...

One of the few positives from this season for L'Arse is Song's emergence as a workhorse in the middle. He's got no quit.

EbullientFatalist said...

RvP is on the pitch, right?

Precious Roy said...

He's perfect for MLS then.

Know I'm okay with song, and he's been fine, but I'm hard pressed to think of any spell of any match where he was a difference maker of any sort.

The NY Kid said...

Theo is giving Cashley fits down the right side.

BentPav said...

Arsenal, without silverware again. But, at least they play beautiful football for their humble supporters

The NY Kid said...

Did someone say something? I couldn't hear it since Spurs are so far down the table.

Precious Roy said...

Also, way over Song I'd go:

Nasri - Awesome fit from the get go.

Eduardo - Leg is fine. He didn't play scared. He just needs to stay healthy otherwise.

Arshavin - Electric. My only complaint is that he causes Wenger to move Nasri to the right where he is a little less dynamic.

Precious Roy said...

Spurs, without a league win over Arsenal. That makes an even decade now, doesn't it?

BentPav said...

NY: I am just saying your humble lot are blessed with Wenger's magic every week. 4-2 and you fucked it up mate. Enjoy another looong summer without silverware, just saying

Jacob said...

Shoot. I turn on the Schalke match just in time to see the boys in blue give up a penalty and a get a red card.

The penalty gets saved at least, but 70 minutes is a long time to play anyone a man down.

EbullientFatalist said...

PR: Agreed.

BentPav: Well, we don't treat the Carling Cup like the be all/end all of our season.

The NY Kid said...

how the fuck do you miss that?

@BentPav - yeah, enjoy being 20 pts adrift of us in the table and knowing that it will always be that way

Unknown said...

Arsenal knows they don't get points for giving up goal kicks, right?

BentPav said...

Ebullient: From your trophy tally recently it doesnt look like you treat anything as your end all be all.

Jacob said...

Oops. No red cars. Dude got subbed off. No idea if it was a injury or what.

The NY Kid said...

Anyone other than the cornrowed Frenchman and it's a goal, me thinks.Don't be ridiculous - Bendtner misses that shot easily.

jjf3 said...

where the hell was this version of Arsenal the last 2 weeks?

@Steve - I don't remember seeing Spurs among Carlito's rather long list of "big English teams", but I could be wrong

EbullientFatalist said...

Rocks, glass houses, etc. etc., Bent.

BentPav said...

NY Kids: But I know that I support the Pride Of North London. I imagine you picked your club b/c of the beautiful football they play. Fair play glory chaser

Jacob said...

(That would be from the Schalke game)

Autoglass said...

A lone Spurs supporter relentlessly hectoring Gooners while Arsenal are playing Chelsea. The Gooners taking the time to fire back.

Magic.

Precious Roy said...

So Droba dives. Cesc gestures to that effect, and HE gets the card?

And it leads to a goal.

Fuck Didier Drogba.

EbullientFatalist said...

Of course.

The NY Kid said...

@BentPav - I have most likely been supporting Arsenal since you were in diapers

BentPav said...

Auto, I hate your lot as well but you lack the smugness of the scum down the road. Anyway, 1-nil.

Precious Roy said...

There is no justice in this world.

BentPav said...

I wish I was that young mate

Autoglass said...

That goal wasn't because of Drogba diving, or Cesc getting a card. That goal was because Arsenal don't consider marking people on set pieces to be interesting or of any import.

Unknown said...

@jjf3: yeah Spurs weren't, but maybe he just forgot?


/delusional

Jacob said...

Nothing worse than a blown call giving the other team an advantage, right Autoglass?

BentPav said...

Their keeper makes Gomes look like Schmeichel

The NY Kid said...

@Auto - our Achilles heel the entire season (and for a few years now)

Precious Roy said...

If Drogba doesn't dive there's no free kick. QED.

Autoglass said...

I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee. I will not complain about the referee.

Precious Roy said...

How is that even possibly a card? Foul probably but he got the ball.

BentPav said...

Fabregas with a cynical challenge. Wenger "I did did not see it"

Precious Roy said...

I didn't complain about the ref. I complained about your Ivorian douchebag.

Jacob said...

Jesus, Cashley is slow.

BentPav said...

Phil Dowd may be an assbandit but in fairness we all know Wenger is as well. That assbandit could have sent Fabregas off as wekk

Jacob said...

Another first half substitution in Germany, this time for Moenchengladbach. Germans are weird.

EbullientFatalist said...

Diaby's first touch is more awkward than a sixteen year old at prom night.

The NY Kid said...

He could have sent Fabregas off, just like Spurs theoretically could have beaten Arsenal some time in the past decade

Unknown said...

looks like Cesc has checked out for the remainder of the season.

Precious Roy said...

Is Arshavin even on the bench? Be nice to see someone who can finish on the pitch.

EbullientFatalist said...

Welp, there's my Sunday.

Jacob said...

Arshavin is sick, and I'm really ready to purchase a defense in the offseason.

BentPav said...

NY: Was Cesc on a yellow? Was the second challenge cynical and yellow worthy. Yes and yes. Dowd showed some commonsense. You should be happy. And yes, we stuffed you 5-1 last year. Scum

Precious Roy said...

Well, that frees up the rest of my morning.

Quality keeping there. Reap it, Wenger.

BentPav said...

NY-2 nil at home to the Chelsea. We got 4 pts off them this year. Whats the problem today? The ref? The glare of the sun? Whats the excuse mate?

The NY Kid said...

@BentPav - call me when you beat us in league play or finish above us in the table. I won't hold my breath. Your club is shite and all you look forward to is having a shite trophy from a shite cup.

Autoglass said...

Good night, Nurse.

Pride of London!

BentPav said...

Look at that "supporters" at the Emirates. This is beautiful

EbullientFatalist said...

I'm not enjoying this whole "TV shots of sullen Gunners fans" meme.

The NY Kid said...

ah, the old "we beat Chelsea, Chelsea is beating you, ergo we are better" argument.

This match has nothing to do with Spuds, but it's all you have to cling to because you are TWENTY FUCKING POINTS ADRIFT

BentPav said...

NY: You are making me cry. We are shite. Ha. 4-2 int he 88th and you couldnt finish us off. You have no bollocks. Your lot are soft.

BentPav said...

20 pts adrift yet I am still having a great Sunday mate. You are heading for another triophyless season. But again, your lot play pretty footy. Use the bold and all caps more. Love winding you cooonts up

BackBergtt said...

Someone got Youtube comments in my Unprofessional Foul!


So it seems anyways.

BentPav said...

Keep using the bold mate. Another loooong summer for your "sexy" lot

Jacob said...

Goddammit, don't feed the trolls. Rule #1 of the internet.

Precious Roy said...

NYK: Stop taking the bait.

He doesn't understand Spurs being 20 adrift because he can't count that high.

jjf3 said...

@MG: Congratulations on graduating yesterday

Unknown said...

yeah MG, congrats on that.

/appropriately quiet Spurs fan.

Autoglass said...

Lingering, in the live blog above, is spot-on in his assessment of the Arsenal right now. Agree with every word.

EbullientFatalist said...

This can't be Youtube, Georger. No one has mentioned Hitler yet.




Oops.

BackBergtt said...

Thanks thanks (I'm still waiting on my final grades though ..)


People aren't capitalizing random words yet either.

Precious Roy said...

Mildly shocking stats of the half?

Possession is actually 50-50 and shots are 8 apiece.

Precious Roy said...

Yeah, congrats Georger.

Jacob said...

Congrats to Georger, what schooling are you moving on to now?

The NY Kid said...

Given the current circumstances I will refrain from making any Wilson Palacios remarks.

And congrats to Georger - we may require your legal services in Baltimore.

Jacob said...

World Cup update? World of Warcraft commercial? What the Hell?

Unknown said...

u75: I'm just surprised we didn't see anything for Proactiv

The NY Kid said...

@LB - I hate you anyway

Jacob said...

Schalke-Moechengladbach back on. Camera just showed a tight shot of the match ball at kick off. With an "S" written on it with a Sharpie. Is Schalke really scared of losing their balls?

Unknown said...

@The NY Kid - that's not nice. Are you as soft and sensitive as your midfield?

Jacob said...

Back to Boone, then.

The NY Kid said...

@LB - my middle certainly is

BackBergtt said...

Yep back to Boone. The windy apple.

Precious Roy said...

LB: He just has to have some place to take out of frustration of home draws to Stoke, Hull, and Fulham costing Pool a shot at the title.

Unknown said...

Indeed I do, PR. It's now called a Pyrrhic Liveblog for that reason.

But hey, we beat Man U twice and Chelsea twice, while you're playing out the season with this limp stuff on Sundays.

Precious Roy said...

Oops... that was to NYK about LB.

And yet, LB you're still exactly the same number of trophies that we are this season. The difference between Arsenal and Liverpool right now is that we know we're just playing out the string.

The NY Kid said...

well that's just perfect

BackBergtt said...

I'm watching the Bremen/Hamburg game. Not sure what channel this is, but it's English announcers. Bremen are beating that ass.

Precious Roy said...

Oops... that comment needed a verb. Something like "taking home."

BentPav said...

3-nil. "We controlled the game, I do not think the score line was fair" Wenger

BackBergtt said...

Oh come now, Arsenal were still within quite realistic striking distance of the third spot if they won this game, it's not like they came out there with nothing to play for.

Unknown said...

For a change, PR, we'll get to enjoy watching someone else struggle in a CL Third Round Qualifier instead of us. See, we're trending up, from fourth to second.

What are the Gunners doing? The opposite? All that youth is nice, though.

(just going for a wind-up, because this game's deader than Dom DeLuise now)

BackBergtt said...

Good lord Hamburg's keeper just made two ridiculous saves on Huge Almeida. And look, he's wearing a 'Fly Emirates' shirt, so I guess it's not the sponsor that makes the goalies that wear it generally shit.

BackBergtt said...

*Hugo

... though Huge would be cooler.

Someone just set off fireworks in the stands.

Precious Roy said...

MG: Eh, maybe with a win, but we still had to go to United with a 3-point gap to close. It was possible but not likely.

This is just sad though. At least we're trying though unlike the CL midweek match.

Unknown said...

PR: can you give us one more good fight this season when you go to Old Trafford? Pretty please?

BackBergtt said...

I think, and correct me if I'm wrong here, that in Germany it is punishable by death to wear any jerseys other than Adidas.

Verification: Fring
Right as Frings fires a laser from distance that the keeper gets to.

BentPav said...

Plenty of empty seats now, "Cheerio Cheerio Cheerio"

Precious Roy said...

Not likely. At least the way it's looking now. We've condeded 6 at home to United and Chelsea in about 140 minutes.

Maybe the magic pixie will do something to prove me wrong but...

JESUS FUCK WALCOTT HOW DID YOU MISS THAT?

The NY Kid said...

and Theo with another miss.

BentPav said...

Theo, we can ask for the goal to be 18 feet wider next year

BackBergtt said...

Maybe Arsenal will play better with nothing to play for, won't have any reason to feel the fear.

Though at this point I'm relying on Hull to win too ... so yeah.

Unknown said...

Spurs need a right back, a left back, and Carlos Tevez.

I say Glen Johnson, and stealing Zhirkov out from under everyone's noses. He'll want to play with Pavs, right?


also, Walcott couldn't kick it in the ocean at this point. How many point blank chances is he going to hit wide?

Unknown said...

oh and can we get in two new knees for Ledley. that'll do just fine.

Jacob said...

This Schalke game is destined to end at zeroes.

The NY Kid said...

if Bendtner scores and pulls down his shorts, this match will have been worth it

jjf3 said...

"Apocalyptic" - see also, Arsenal's final touch

Could someone please explain to Walcott that if your shot is never targeted within the frame of the goal, you will never score?

Oh, yeah! Arsenal's #1 striker comes on - that'll open up the scoring.

And good to know that you really can't play Le Sulk and Drogs at the same time...

BentPav said...

We have Corluka and Hutton. We need a LB and maybe push Bale up

Precious Roy said...

"If Bendtner scores..."

What color is the sky in your world NYK?

BackBergtt said...

Pretty sure they just showed a banner that said something like 'Hamburg Eat Shit' in German, the announcer definitely commented on it 'I'm not going to translate that for you'. Awesome.

Unknown said...

@BentPav,

Don't know if you saw the game yesterday, but I run faster than Hutton. He sucks. Corluka is better in the middle.

I agree with you on Bale, though. Be much better in the midfield since he can't defend a lick.

EbullientFatalist said...

Georger: You really going the professional student route? I highly recommend it. I'm currently getting a masters in applied politics and its wonderful. Obama is funding my education.

I'm done with this Arsenal team. I've supported them all year, but Wenger has trotted out an underage, under-experienced team that has no hope in big matches. I'm not saying spend!spend!spend!, but there needs to be focused, thoughtful changes to both the midfield and the backline.

Precious Roy said...

Theo Walcott... as lethal as aspirin.

Precious Roy said...

EF: Even given that, all things being equal, I'd rather be us the Spartak heading in to the summer.

However, all things are not equal and we are not a multi-billionaire's toy.

Unknown said...

damn you, LB, damn you.

(but you're right)

we are also available to take crap keepers off your hands, should you decide you no longer want them.

Jacob said...

Oh boy, Denilson.

Precious Roy said...

Oh yeah... Denilson. For Song. Why bother?

EbullientFatalist said...

PR: Yeah, we aren't going to go spend massive amounts - like always - but there are some players out there who we can get at a good price and will stiffen our resolve when defending.

With that being said, I expect our summer signing list to consist solely of Sofiane Feghouli.

Jacob said...

Bendtner! Pull the shorts down, kid!

EbullientFatalist said...

BENDTNER!

Precious Roy said...

Okay... Well, Bolton put in 3 in eight minutes. Why can't us?

jjf3 said...

Holy Shit! The Dane scores...

The NY Kid said...

see, PR? I knew he would score!

Jacob said...

Why can't us, indeed?

EbullientFatalist said...

That's what, fifteen goals for him?

Precious Roy said...

Get a second... just to make them sweat.

On and to make it respectable.

Unknown said...

wow whodathunkit, kicking the ball at the goal works!

EbullientFatalist said...

"Why can't us?"

I think we have a UF t-shirt.

Precious Roy said...

Is Dowd going to blow a whistle any time someone in a blue shirt goes down?

The Fan's Attic said...

were any of bendtner's goals meaningful?

jjf3 said...

About 20 minutes ago, I thought this game could still end 4-4. Then nothing happened. Will that goal open the spigot?

Jacob said...

@EF- well, it worked for the Phils.

Precious Roy said...

EF... that's stolen from DS. Some guy in Philly called into a radio show and said that on air before the Phillies' playoff run last season.

Jacob said...

Will Arsenal's last 20 look like their first 20, but with actual goals?

BackBergtt said...

Yeah Andrew I'm doing a MA in international relations / comparative politics next year, then hoping to get into a phd program for political communications.

Precious Roy said...

No whistle. He's wearing red.

Jacob said...

A better touch there, ans it's a penalty. Ball got too far away form Ade.

BentPav said...

Adebayor with a Drogbalike dive

EbullientFatalist said...

Good non-call for Dowd, but considering his prior decisions, I could've sworn that was a PK.

Damnit, DS, ruining good ideas and shit.

Jacob said...

Yes, colour guy. Except for the touch he got on the ball, there was no contact on the ball. What a maroon.

/Bugs'd

Unknown said...

you guys are getting advanced degrees in fields much too applicable to the real world. try something like history, you'll find yourself dabbling in the meaningless on a regular basis.

Precious Roy said...

At first I totally agree with the non-whistle and was just talking shit. But there was no play on the ball and he got into Ade's shoulder.

Just saying. PKs have been given for less.

Jacob said...

Yay for the Arsenal Ladies. That may be their last title for a while.

BackBergtt said...

Some debutant for Bremen just hit the post on an open cage. Ouch.

Jacob said...

No power on that, unfortunately.

Precious Roy said...

This is actually kind of sad... where the fuck was this sense of urgency the previous 150 minutes?

EbullientFatalist said...

PR: Upon replay, I agree. It could've been given legitimately. But, lately, there's very little "legitimate" when Chelsea is involved.

Steve: I was going to get a PhD in History, but my advisor asked if I wanted to be thirty and teaching at community college? I applied to law school the next day.

Jacob said...

Gotta love advisors that actually tell you the truth.

The Fan's Attic said...

now only if arsenal could stop hitting it right at cech.

EbullientFatalist said...

Great scramble in front of the net; still no finishing.

The Fan's Attic said...

wow, that was a nice save by cech.

Precious Roy said...

How did we not score there?

Oh Silvestre... please leave the Emirates now and forever.

Precious Roy said...

Isn't it only the media that usually abuses Cole this badly?

EbullientFatalist said...

But PR, Silvestre was brought in to provide depth and experience, no? He's provided neither, and at the worst possible times.

Unknown said...

yeah my adviser never asked me that question. thus, here i am.

in truth though, it's really not a bad gig.

Jacob said...

OK, so it wasn't.

Unknown said...

dive

The NY Kid said...

that's just terrible - it has to be either a PK or a YC for Ade

BackBergtt said...

I want to be teaching at ASU when I'm thirty.

Jacob said...

Pinball goal. But a nice first save there. I hate the back line.

EbullientFatalist said...

Jesus we're awful in the back. Just so terrible.

The NY Kid said...

anelka was a yard offsides

Jacob said...

O/Odds on a chippy red in the last five or so minutes?

Jacob said...

NYK-he wasn't in the play at the time. He was onside with the shot.

BentPav said...

Ade dive. 9.2. Chelsea stuffing the Scum at the Emirates, 10.0

BackBergtt said...

But the last goal they gave up at home in the league was Keane's goal Christmas week.

I guess no Gallas and all that, but this team went on a miraculously watertight run with a mediocre defense and sketchy at best keeping. That's gotta be encouraging for next year.

EbullientFatalist said...

Steve: Yeah, I still kinda wish I went the history route.


Ballack = cunt.


Is that a shot of Wenger concerned about his job?

Jacob said...

Guess Arsenal can stop with the 20-something unbeaten in league talk, eh?

Precious Roy said...

MG: Said it lots, but once Gallas lost the armband he was solid. And I'm beginning to appreciate more and more how good he was.

Jacob said...

Dear RvP-
You don't have a right foot. Don't try to use it.

EbullientFatalist said...

Still a decent run, Umlaut. And it allowed us to think we were better than we are.

Unknown said...

anyone think that Guus will end up staying?

EbullientFatalist said...

Emirates is empty, not surprising given the display.

Everyone have a good Sunday.

Precious Roy said...

It's amazing though... we can put out a bunch of squad players and abuse Portsmouth at their place, but that's what I now shall call the Moses Malone of shipping goals against the other Big 4.

We gave up 4, 4 and 4 to Liverpool, United*, and Chelsea in our last matches against them.


(*Over two legs)

Jacob said...

Just takes

Jacob said...

2 more

Jacob said...

to jump

EbullientFatalist said...

Steve: If I were a Chelsea supporter, I'd want him to stay badly.

Gibbs will be solid, but Silvestre has proven a disaster as a center-back. Arsenal's backline has been "munificent" these past two games.


/word-a-day

Precious Roy said...

Weak.

For about 20 minutes there, that was about as good as you could feel about a 3-1 drubbing.

Then it became a 4-1 drubbing.

Sarah said...

Well that was fun to watch...

The Spurs-Gooners bitchfight in the comments was entertaining though, thanks for that guys.

And on to Barca vs Villareal.

jjf3 said...

Gillingham takes the lead on a beautiful finish by Jackson that never should have occurred: clear handball by the Gills in the leadup...