Tuesday, May 5, 2009

CL Open Thread: Arsenal v. Man U

Arsene and SAF Do Their Best Impression of Ronnie and Reggie Kray


Well, today is the proverbial biggest game of the season for Arsenal and Manchester United. The preview and inevitable pre-game transfer rumors are both out of the way. Now it's time to get down to business.

As the irrepressible Arseblog said in his call to arms: Manchester United are not our rivals, not our competitors, not our peers: they are the enemy. Treat them as such.

Lineups and your comments after the hop.

Arsenal (4-4-2): Almunia, Sagna, Toure, Djourou, Gibbs, Walcott, Fabregas, Song, Nasri, Van Persie, Adebayor. Subs: Fabianski, Eboue, Silvestre, Diaby, Denilson, Vela, Bendtner

Man Utd (4-5-1): Van der Sar, O'Shea, Ferdinand, Vidic, Evra, Fletcher, Carrick, Anderson, Park, Ronaldo, Rooney. Subs: Kuszczak, Rafael Da Silva, Evans, Giggs, Scholes, Berbatov, Tevez

270 comments:

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Mike Georger said...

"Manchester United are not our rivals, not our competitors, not our peers: they are the enemy. Treat them as such."
Uh huh, remember that when Arsene lays down for Fergie in the league soon.

What does Park do? I don't get the joke with that guy.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I have ESPN360, but I'm at work, this computer blows, and I can't play along in the comments if I use it. Ironic, eh?

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Park is who Manchester United's Dirk Kuyt would be if Carlos Tevez wasn't Manchester United's Dirk Kuyt.

Precious Roy said...

I'm so nervous I think I'm going to throw up.

Mike Georger said...

That's what I was thinking, earlier the BBC noted Park's 'work rate.'

But Kuyt started all but like two EPL games this year.

Park strikes me as United's Bolo Zenden. Just really out of place on that team.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

True confession: I love Park.

The NY Kid said...

@Georger - no way we lay down in the EPL fixture. Arsene may jiggle the line-up a bit, but we're a strong team even if he starts Vela and Ramsey, Gibbs, etc.

The NY Kid said...

@Mags - he's the only Manc I can respect

Mike Georger said...

United aren't Pompey and Wigan, I'll believe it when I see that Russian fairy prancing over the corpse of VDS.

Mike Georger said...

That's actual fairy, not Hotscots fairy.

Teeknuts said...

So does no more Champions League on ESPN mean no more dumb neon Sony footballs? I sure hope so.

Precious Roy said...

God it's going to annoy me off if we 'win' today 2-1 and lose on aggregate, then go to OT in a couple of weeks and spank them like 3-0.

The NY Kid said...

he's not a fairy, he's a PIXIE!

Precious Roy said...

Dear Baby Jesus,

3-1.

You owe me.

Mike Georger said...

Black Francis is a Pixie. He's a fairy.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Hey, I like the neon football.

Now, the operatic Heineken ads...those are another issue entirely.

Spectator said...

AND IT'S ARSENAL
ARSENAL FC
BY FAR THE GREATEST TEAM
THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN!!

C'mon you Gunners.

Spectator said...

Italian ref (I only know him from the million Serie A games on FSC)

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I'm going to cast my vote for "brownie", actually.

Teeknuts said...

What's key about the Champions League semis is that the winner goes to the final. Well, I guess I can't argue against that Tommy

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Fabregas = Sylar.

The NY Kid said...

Jesus, could Ronaldo be any more of a douche?

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I keep forgetting to ask: what's the deal with the kids?

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I fucking hate John O'Shea.

Mike Georger said...

"what's the deal with the kids?"
It's Arsenal's reserve side.

/low fruit and all that

The NY Kid said...

@Mags - they are for SAF to feed on

Steve said...

Arsenal 1-0, 5-4 on PKs.

/hoping for a good game after last week's disappointments.

Teeknuts said...

Park did some hard work falling down

Spectator said...

Arsenal look crisp early on. Hope this keeps up.

ü75 said...

Smurfs look a little scared.

ü75 said...

Hey, john O'shea:
Nice forearm, dick.

machine gooner funk said...

thank you kolo. cmon you gunners!

ü75 said...

Fuck. goddaammit. What the fuck do arsenal have to do to not fuck things up at the back?

Teeknuts said...

Goodnight gunners. Thanks a lot Gibbs.

Spectator said...

Dammit

Steve said...

whoops. welp, gnight.

machine gooner funk said...

FUCK! you've got to be shitting me

Spectator said...

Fuck off Tommy Smyth

ü75 said...

Seriously, don't fucking fall down. It's not fucking hard.

The NY Kid said...

so it's over then

Mike Georger said...

Like I said, don't get what Park does ....

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

At least it was Park.

ü75 said...

FUCK

/done

Precious Roy said...

God fucking dammit.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Did Gibbs fuck up? Because I still kind of blame Gibbs for the goal last week.

ü75 said...

Hey, Ade:
Go earn your transfer price tonight, alright?

Precious Roy said...

I really believed that as long as United didn't score first...

Thanks Baby Jesus, you can go back to fucking up the rest of my life.

ü75 said...

Gibbs slipped on a slow, rolled cross that had no one to go to until Gibbs fell down.

Mike Georger said...

Throw her in the hole.

ü75 said...

Turn it off.

Mike Georger said...

Wow.

Teeknuts said...

And that really kills it. This sucks SO HARD.

Steve said...

oh. my. god.

does arsenal realize the game started 10 minutes ago?

machine gooner funk said...

horror defending. YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING! cuntaldo does us in

The NY Kid said...

I'm going to go puke

Steve said...

to be fair, that was a fucking laser.

ü75 said...

Manny was slow getting across, might have been shielded by his own wall.

Precious Roy said...

RIP 08-09. We get nothing and like it.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

So I can watch the Cavs tonight, then.

Spectator said...

oh well

Keith said...

He scores the GOOOALS. He does the high-fives, but not with SCHOOLES


/have to make it fun somehow. damned United

Nathaniel said...

Damn.

ü75 said...

But if he was, then he didn't set it up correctly. That was a knuckler, not a curveball.

S2N said...

Jesus, that was a fucking rocket. Game over.

ü75 said...

Fuck you Tommy Smyth. I hope you die early in your forced retirement.

Precious Roy said...

Well, now I have to somehow find stuff to do with my life until the start of next season.

Teeknuts said...

The only way Gibbs can come close to making up for his fuck up at this point is to break Ronaldo's leg.

The Fan's Attic said...

I will now wait for 101goals to get that goal up asap.

Arsenal, I'm glad to see that you are rolling over now and playing rope-a-dope with ManU for the league match coming up.

The NY Kid said...

Almunia should have had that.

But Jonny Evans is still a rapist.

ü75 said...

Fuck you Tommy Smyth. I hope you die early in your forced retirement.

/gonna keep posting this every time he makes an asinine statement.

Spectator said...

Got the volume off. I can't take 65 more minutes of Smyth.

God I hate United.

machine gooner funk said...

how does a club let somethinng like this happen? i swear arsenal play with no urgency or heart at the time you'd expect they'd be in good supply of both. truly diheartening

Mike Georger said...

Johnny Evans is, no question, the most improved rapist for United this year.

Mike Georger said...

Hey it's Hootie!

ü75 said...

On the plus side, I don't have to worry about resetting my DVR for extra time.

Precious Roy said...

"how does a club let somethinng like this happen? i swear arsenal play with no urgency or heart at the time you'd expect they'd be in good supply of both. truly diheartening"

A-fucking-men.

Mike said...

Arsenal your OUT
ManU your IN

machine gooner funk said...

*disheartening

/type pourly when furious/dejected

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I wonder what Ray Hudson would say about that goal?

Teeknuts said...

Rooney's yellow boots look even more ridiculous in the smurf kit.

Precious Roy said...

On the plus side, I don't have to worry about flights to Rome.

ü75 said...

Nice save, Manny

ü75 said...

Might have to start worrying about double digits.

Steve said...

you know what the Arse are missing? a gerrard-type player to instill confidence and fire in the rest of the team.

/master of the obvious.

Mike Georger said...

"Not an Arsenal flag in sight now. Its like a return to Highbury the Library."

LOW BLOW

Teeknuts said...

Dear god that was a very mannish woman they just cut to.

Signal to Noise said...

ridiculous. now stuck rooting for Barca so the final isn't purely a "whom do I hate less" proposition.

EbullientFatalist said...

I'm already guiness three deep. We laid done like every other team. Fuck that. I'm fucking sick. Although I there are a few gunners here to share in my dejection.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

To be honest, Arsenal are missing Arshavin. They seem to be a completely different side when he's in.

I'm also not terribly impressed with Walcott lately, but that's a separate issue entirely.

machine gooner funk said...

i really am astonished. how in god's name can you not show up for a game of this importance/magnitude? i love this club but too often they play like outright pussies

Mike Georger said...

Ronaldo pointed to the Nike swoosh. What a dick.

Steve said...

@Magnakai: Cesc has gone missing, too.

But yeah, the Russian has become crucial to this team pretty damn quickly.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

He was completely unmarked on that corner.

The NY Kid said...

so help me, if we don't buy a CB and a DM during this summer I'm going to kick Ivan Gazidis in the balls

ü75 said...

Take back what I said about the wall setup. The 2nd was purely down to being slow getting across.

Precious Roy said...

Every now and then Wenger really needs to be more like Vizzini: "Did it ever occur to you that your JOBS are at stake?"

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

@Steve: I wonder more and more if Fabregas is being written out of the plot in favor of Arshavin, frankly. He's been nonexistant in both this game and the first leg.

Mike Georger said...

I didn't think Cesc was even playing.

machine gooner funk said...

@nyk: you're gonna have to kick arsene, he's got final say on all transfer matters. arsene: "replace gilberto & flamini? eh the kids can do it."

Signal to Noise said...

@Roy - right now it's more like they don't give a damn about their phoney-baloney jobs.

They're getting a harrumph outta me.

ü75 said...

Well, I was thinking it earlier, so I might as well type it out. Best as I can tell, this is Manchester's first-choice squad, with the possible exception of getting PFA PotY Giggs out there. It's not the same for Arsenal.

The NY Kid said...

@mgf - I know that, but I can't bring myself to hurt Arsene

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

@ MG: "Playing" is one of those funny words...

Teeknuts said...

With the way today is going, I'm fully expecting Chelsea to beat Barca tomorrow.

Precious Roy said...

Really, Flamini, Gilberto, and even Senderos... That depth might have saved our ass this season.

I can't believe I just typed that about Senderos, but he would have been better than Silvestre. Gibbs is going to be really good, but fucking Christ, don't fall down son.

Precious Roy said...

I swear I'm not watching a Spaktak v. (66)6'ers final.

The meteor never comes. I'm going to do something productive with those two hours instead.

Mike Georger said...

Transfer Talk with Derek Rae and Tommy Smyth, brought to you by Soccernet, The Glazer Family, and Cunts!

jape said...

Here you guys are - I just wandered into a discussion of Henry V and not Henry 14 and was very confused.

Just in time for the rest of this shit mess of a game.

machine gooner funk said...

@nyk: i know. even when he fucks up i try so hard to put the blame somewhere else but the more we play like this it's gotta fall on him (as much as it pains me to say that. atleast put some goals in get show some fucking pride please. oh and to those saying cesc might leave, i really hope he doesnt, what kind of message does it send when/if your skipper leaves you

Spectator said...

@PR: Don't forget Senderos is coming back next season! Only a one-year loan.

I've given up on this game and am on thisisphotobomb.com instead.

Mike Georger said...

No Bronx Cheer for Alumnia not evacuating his bowels on that one? Some crowd.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Gibbs is directly responsible, in my mind, for two goals. This one, clearly. Last week, he failed to even sort of come out of the goal mouth to mark O'Shea; he was completely ball-watching in the net.

To be fair to Gibbs, though, he's not first choice by a long shot yet.

Mike Georger said...

The first one set the tone? Really? Who's the dickbag that said people shouldn't mock Smyth?

HERE COMES THREE

Mike Georger said...

Ronaldo shooting from a free kick is something different? And a player scoring unmarked in the box is something different? Yeah you can't get a reading on these guys. Wiley!

ü75 said...

Here you go, Georger. I've stopped listening

Fuck you Tommy Smyth. I hope you die early in your forced retirement.

Precious Roy said...

No, with Clichy down he was pressed into service. He's had some great moments, but has made critical mistakes (although I blame the deflection off Silvestre as much as Gibbs for last week's goal).

I don't want to bitch about injuries. It's part of the game. But that's why United have a shot at 4 trophies still. They are WAY better 12-22 than any other team in the league.

Spectator said...

Someone should make a gif where c-Ron is doing his pre-freekick ritual and when he does his intense stare at the football his head explodes.

machine gooner funk said...

this team habitually rips my heart out. 2 goals in the first 11 minutes?! jesus tapdancing christ

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Okay, so I've mostly blown off the fact that Cleveland has a good basketball team, but with them being in the playoffs now and me living there and shit, I should probably watch that tonight (since re-watching this with my wife is totally out of the question at this point). Anything I should know about them?

Precious Roy said...

God, if fucking Porto could have scored one goddam goal at home we wouldn't even be watching this fucking abomination against Untied.

Spectator said...

Enough with the camera shots of the sad Gunners in the stands. We get it, you bastards.

The NY Kid said...

@Mags - they have this kid named Lebron

ü75 said...

@Spec-Or, you could just hire a sniper to do the same thing. Then you would have plentiful video evidence.

Teeknuts said...

@MG That LeBron guy is pretty good I've heard

machine gooner funk said...

diving cunt

Mike Georger said...

If Arsenal were real men they'd be breaking peoples legs right now. BE HUMAN FFS!

Precious Roy said...

Oh the fucking nance wasn't even touched. God I hate that fucker.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

@NYK: For now, at least.

I guess I'm wondering if they're legitimately good or if it's all just him. We went down this road a couple years ago, and it just ended in the Spurs going all ManU on our Arsenal.

Mike Georger said...

Fairy Dust Ivan wrapped up like the new born Christ on the sideline there.

Steve said...

@ Magnakai: they have some dude named LeBron James. I hear he's the next big thing.

Spectator said...

@MH: They are so going to win the championship this year. Lebron has actually managed to take his game to another level and Danny Ferry has assembled a ragtag supporting cast.

Mike Georger said...

Wait that's a foul on Cesc? What the fuck is going on?

The NY Kid said...

Ronaldo is the biggest fucking diving nancy I have ever seen. He's worse than Figo

EbullientFatalist said...

I read the wrong shakespeare today. I should've gone with a comedy instead of a historic epic. Where is this ref getting these calls?

Steve said...

i'm glad three of us could make that joke.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Did Fabregas just get called for receiving a reach around there?

machine gooner funk said...

@MH: yea lbj should be enough incentive to watch just for the possiblity of what he might do. i'm a heat fan and you can't get me to turn away from a game b/c at any moment wade can do something brilliant/spectacular. lebron is the same way

Mike Georger said...

". Where is this ref getting these calls?"

I don't know what you're talking about, and it's pathetic to suggest these calls are anything but inspired.
/those two United fans.

Teeknuts said...

He's the only guy from the Cavs I could name. I also know they have a white guy with a fro.

The NY Kid said...

@Mags - no, Fabregas was called for being the victim of a headlock

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

@Spec: So now would be a good time to jump on the bandwagon, then? Because I live in Cleveland and am a Liverpool fan; there ain't been much to celebrate lately.

Signal to Noise said...

so Kim grabs Cesc's head in mid-air and it's a foul on Fabregas. Got it.

ü75 said...

Fuck you Tommy Smyth. I hope you die early in your forced retirement.

jape said...

Seriously Gibbs - that was a cross?

Teeknuts said...

At least Arsenal have a truly fantastic looking pitch.

Mike Georger said...

Shaka Hislop can give tips on how to get embarrassed by Steven Gerrard in the biggest game of your career.

ü75 said...

Hey look, more sad Arsenal fans.

Precious Roy said...

Fuck you Tommy Smyth. I hope you get assraped then die early in your forced retirement.

Fixed.

Mike Georger said...

So there is what, zero chance, that Barca actually win right?


No, you don't get to invoke Istanbul assholes.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

When Walcott can't use his speed, he looks confused.

ü75 said...

Theo's touch is pretty poor tonight.

Mike Georger said...

Did he really just call him rugged?

Handsome means he looks at himself, rugged means you look at him.

Teeknuts said...

It really looks like Arsenal scoring is a practical impossibility.

ü75 said...

So, who's actually coming back for the 2nd?

Mike Georger said...

Two seconds of stoppage time eh?

Precious Roy said...

Mercy killing (of time).

ü75 said...

It's enough, Moleman, it's more than enough.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

@ü75: That seems to be par for the course for him over the last three/four games.

I may come back. This is still better than work.

Steve said...

agreed. i'll still be here.

machine gooner funk said...

just an uninspired, inexcusable display. especially in a game many of these players called "the biggest of their careers" just pathetic

Mike Georger said...

"It's enough, Moleman, it's more than enough."

Someone got TBL in my UF!

Precious Roy said...

We're not going through. But is it too much to ask for this team to come out and play with a fucking chip on its shoulder? Fucking push back and at least level this leg at two.

Fucking serve notice that you are going to come into Old Trafford in a couple weeks and shove a foot in their asses.

Mike Georger said...

"But is it too much to ask for this team to come out and play with a fucking chip on its shoulder?"

From what I've seen of them this year ... yes it is. The exception being Arshavin, and sadly, well you know.

Sometimes it's good to have a player who actually lets his heart overrule his head sometimes.

EbullientFatalist said...

Well, finnegans wake pub is appropriately. Its as dull as a Joyce novel in here. Four goals in forty five? Not likely, but dom spiro spero - While I breathe I hope.

Spectator said...

Awesome Cleveland tourism vid (one nsfw f-bomb in here)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysmLA5TqbIY

Precious Roy said...

That was rhetorical, Georger.

Mike Georger said...

I'm sorry, I don't speak Japanese.


At the least they could goad someone into a card that would keep them out of the final.

WhiteSpeedReceiver said...

It's half time and Jonny Evans isn't half of what Robin Van Persie is, player or rapist.

Mike Georger said...

Rooney and PFA Evra on a yellow, one of them is going down, book it.

Assuming of course, that SAF is like Rafa and won't sub anyone before 65 when they're sitting on a yellow.

Teeknuts said...

Oh wonderful, Becks is here. Today just keeps getting worse

jape said...

Wow, happy to see Eboué - that's a first.

Mike Georger said...

" Oh wonderful, Becks is here"

I honestly don't know who he plays for.

Teeknuts said...

Holy shit, why are there police dogs at the Emirates?

The NY Kid said...

dammit WSR, I wasn't expecting you to show up!

Wow, the Emirates emptied at the half.

Precious Roy said...

Because Arsenal fans needs massive doses of smack to survive the rest of this afternoon.

ü75 said...

Police dog is disturbing.

ü75 said...

That guy go shopping at the half? Why does he have a plastic bag?

WhiteSpeedReceiver said...

@ NYK: I was planning on avoiding everything until I could watch the match tonight, but a coworker ruined everything so I decided to show up and waste time here.

If there are any stapler-related murders in St. Paul today, I was here. You guys are all witnesses.

Mike Georger said...

Police dog story time!

My senior year at Appalachian, when we beat Furman to goto the national championship game (first of three, eat it Andrew), the school essentially rioted and took over the streets. A town of 20k isn't prepared for that, and they have like fifteen cops roll out to squash 15k students who are piss drunk. Long story short, one of the police dogs freaked out from all the noise and turned on the cop, straight lit his shit up.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I'm ten minutes late and yet it feels like I never left.

ü75 said...

Vela looks like he's really relishing the idea of going in.

Teeknuts said...

Why don't they put the best striker in the world, Mr. Pink Boots in?

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I love how ESPN pretends to give a shit about soccer by posting up the Copa Lib schedule.

Spectator said...

Let's say I wanted to bet on Bendtner scoring 4 goals.... Wonder what kind of odds I would get?

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

Oh, nevermind, I'm streaming this from Mexico. My bad.

The NY Kid said...

10,000 - 1

Mike Georger said...

Don't ever tell me the odds.

And Chewie ... you should probably change the negative power coupling.

ü75 said...

Still waiting on anything to happen...

The NY Kid said...

@u75 - well, we will probably paginate pretty soon.

Teeknuts said...

Well, fuck this.

Precious Roy said...

I fucking hate ever last one of them.

Spectator said...

Turning off TV now

The NY Kid said...

alright, I'm leaving work on that fucking note.

Precious Roy said...

Djourou's fault. After he got beat by the backheel he hesitated and was slow getting back.

Fuck this. Maybe the Cubs are on.

WhiteSpeedReceiver said...

Now Arsenal gets 2 goals, and I actually have a prediction come true for once. Right? Right?

Teeknuts said...

Ah, its time for the POS player of the year to come on.

Magnakai Haaskivi said...

I'm totally watching the rest of this disaster.

Goat said...

Hey all. I had the benefit of missing the first half--I was picking my kid at daycare with my wife directed to call me with updates. When she called after about 5 minutes, I knew it wasn't good. When she called a couple minutes later I almost drove off the road. At least I knew I wouldn't have a heart attack watching the rest. This fucking sucks.

Teeknuts said...

Rafael looks like one of the stoners from the beginning of Supertroopers.

jape said...

Nice flop Vidic, you pussy.

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