Wednesday, April 8, 2009

New FIFA World Rankings Released.

Today FIFA have released the latest world rankings after the last round of World Cup qualifying games. England are up to 7th after winning all 5 of their qualifiers (including the stuffing of Croatia) and scoring 16 goals in the process. During this period England also beat Germany in Berlin (get in!) and shoved 4 past Slovakia.

Follow me after the jump for a look at the FIFA rankings in a little more depth.

So here's the top ten.

FIFA World Rankings:
1. Spain
2. Germany
3. Holland
4. Brazil
5. Italy
6. Argentina
7. England
8. Croatia
9. Russia

European Champions Spain stay in top spot after winning all 6 of their WC games thus far. They still look impressive although they are in a pretty weak group with the likes of Armenia, Belgium and Estonia.

Germany have won 5 five of their qualifiers and drawn one, against Finland. You can only beat who you play, right? Germany are not a great team in my eyes, but as long as they win, they will stay were they are.

Holland have won all of their qualifiers so far and conceded just one goal in doing so. To Macedonia. This is quite surprising as the Dutch have never really been known for keeping clean sheets with their style of attacking footy.

Brazil are done. There. I said it! Lucky to be 4th. Washed up, found out. D.O.N.E.
6 draws and a 2-0 defeat to Paraguay in their qualifiers. No one should fear Goofy and his mates anymore, the standard of many world teams has improved and Brazil may as well stay home next summer. They are second in their CONMEBOL group, the lord knows how! Their recent run deserves a drop out of the top ten but somehow they are sticking around at number 4.

Italy have won 4 and drawn 2 in qualifying. They are still top of their group with 14 points, but the Republic of Ireland are right behind them.

Argentina have hired a disgusting fat cheat as a manager and as a result God is punishing them. They sit 4th in the CONMEBOL group, 4 draws and 3 defeats. Last week they were thumped 6-1 by BOLIVIA. Yeah that's right BOLIVIA. BOLIVIA beat them 6-1. They were O-BOLIVIA-TED. Sorry. I really do enjoy seeing Maradouche struggle. It could be a little perverse, I know. 6th? FIFA are having a laugh. Maybe they missed a 1 off the front.

Bolivia. 58th in the rankings.

England are 7th and they look great at the moment. The WCQ wins and the victory over Germany in Berlin have English folk genuinely excited for next summer. I know I am. 7th is still a bit crap, when you consider England's improvement over the last year and the fact that our group is tougher than most, we really should be higher.

Croatia are next. They have won 4, lost 1 and drawn 1, against the Ukraine. What else can you say? They will likely pip the Ukraine to second place.

Russia are 9th and this is largely due to the 'Guus' factor. Current Chelsea and Russia manager Hiddink is not a bad manager to say the least. Russia are improved of late and have won 4 of their 5 qualifiers. They are second in their group to Germany but could catch the Germans when all is said and done.

France are 10th, why oh why oh why. WHY? They lost 3-1 to Austria, drew with Romania and only managed to beat the mighty Lithuania 1-0 away and at HOME. They also recently lost to Argentina in a friendly and drew 0-0 with Uruguay. In a nutshell, France are not the France they were. Their day has been and it ain't coming back for a while. They should be grateful to be 10th.

Other teams worth a mention are Portugal who rank 11th, Scotland at 24th and how about this... Northern Ireland are 27th, EIGHT places above the Republic of Ireland.

No, no, no I didn't forget, of course, how could I forget the U.S. America is now 15th. A position earned after beating soccer giants Trinidad and Tobago (75th), Guatemala (111th) and Cuba (98th). I know, I know. You can only beat who you play! This is why I am starting a 'USA for CONMEBOL' campaign. It's the nearest group right?

So who is last? That honor goes to Papua New Guinea who rank 202nd. Papua don't preach AT all. To no one. A Google search even failed to find an image!

Full rankings can be found here.



The Likely Lad said...

and Mexico, dillweed.

Spectator said...

The computer in Zurich that generated these rankings is quite sad that anyone disagrees with the results.

Spectator said...


Mike Georger said...

England can't play in weather hotter than 60F, I'd like to see them play at twelve thousand feet.

Ian said...

Mexico sucking, beyond giving US fans ample mirth and joy, is also great for seeding next year. No way if the US wins the group that Mexico gets the protected seed.

Unless, that is, the seeding takes into account the beatings on tap in South Africa this summer.

Bigus Dickus said...

Can it Georger, unless you want me to lay a 'Lingering' style beat down on you. ;)

Mike Georger said...

ha. ha. ha.

Autoglass said...

England are overrated. They are always overrated. They will now qualify early, enter the WC ranked about 6th, and then will crash out in the quarters to a Portuguese side ranked 10th. Mark it. Why do we keep watching this movie?

Lennon's Eyebrow said...

How the fuck are the Czechs ranked 12? They're in fourth place in their qualifying group. They're even behind the Slovakian half of the artist formerly known as Czechoslovakia.

Teeknuts said...

@Autoglass: Two words. Nacho Crouch.

/Pull out the rope

The NY Kid said...

Based on the talent on the pitch (Titi, Ribery, Gignac, Mandanda/Lloris, Clichy, Sagna) we deserve to be 10th, but we don't play as a team. But who would you put above us?

Anonymous said...

@ Autoglass: if Portugal make it

Bigus Dickus said...

@ Kid. Paraguay? 7 wins in that group must count for something. Greece? Maybe.

@Auto. Thanks for seeing into the future. We must stop playing football NOW. No more managers, no more young kids coming through. No more false hope victories against Germany and Croatia. You have save everyone a great deal of time. Well done.

Spectator said...

Anyone else think the FIFA logo looks like testes?

Andrew said...

Spec: It's quite an accomplishment to lower the level of conversation with this group.

I'm late to this thread, but after Spain, I'm convinced England is the next best squad. Heading into South Africa, and barring injuries (always have to throw in that qualification) I see England as a shoo-in for the semis.

As for Spain, their present talent is obscene. They should win the WC next year, and threaten in the Euro 12 campaign as well. Meaning, is there anything scarier than Cesc in his prime with a crafty Torres up front?

Autoglass said...

Andrew, did you just say England are a shoo-in for the Semis? Damn, lad, have you watched the last 40 years of tournaments? They flatter to deceive, my boy, they flatter to deceive.

Bigus Dickus said...

Again Auto...Thanks for using the last 40 years to predict the outcome of a tournament played next year by current England players. Saved me lots of time. I shall write a blog on fly fishing during the WC. Been meaning to do that for years.

EbullientFatalist said...

@Autoglass: Yeah, I know, I know. But they've got all the talent in the world, and Capello has them thinking they can - hell, SHOULD - win next year. England starts players every team in Europe wants and Fabio is the process of implementing strong, attacking tactics. With a proper celestial alignment, I see England going far.

Note: "Proper celestial alignment" means "Halley's Comet."

EbullientFatalist said...

Oh, and I updated my commenter name, just to reduce confusion between my wordpress, twitter, google ID's. So, yeah, take note.