Monday, March 23, 2009

Brazilian-style motivation

Are you an aspiring coach who looks to get the best out of your charges? Have you been frustrated by that one kid who just doesn't seem to get it? Are you at you wit's end because you don't know what to do? Perhaps you need to sign up for Roberto Fernandes' patented two-step process for getting the most out of a player.

Step 1: Put that kid in a dress.

Step 2: Profit!

Heck, there's not even a "???" step. Step 1 causes Step 2 immediately. Let's see something else on the internet do that.

ONTD has been nice enough to bring such a process to our attention.

Fernandes is the manager of Figueirense, who currently play in the second national tier of Brazilian football. The player in the picture above is Jairo, 21 year old central defender. As the story goes, Fernanades was extremely frustrated with Jairo's play, so he put Jairo in the skimpy/sassy top. Jairo's reponse was empahatic and immediate. In the manager's words, Jairo gave one of the team's top performances next match.

So, let this be a lesson to aspiring coaches everywhere. If you can't get through to little Jimmy with words, try embarrassment. As long as it is not your kid, and you are not responsible for future psychiatric bills, what do you really have to lose?

In case the picture above was not proof enough, here's a news report on the whole deal.


Andrew said...

In related news, Wenger has given Denilson a new kit.

Matt said...

You forgot a step.

1. Put kid in dress.
2. ????
3. PROFIT!!!!

Teeknuts said...

At least this Brazilian-Style motivation didn't include an extremely uncomfortable wax job.

The Fan's Attic said...

Ronaldo Original just put in his transfer request.

Matt said...

If this is Brazilian style motivation, then I'd imagine that Brazilian style rewards are your choice of Ugly Ronaldo's best trap prostitute.