Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Blackburn Are Too Fat To Win

Pot. Kettle. Blackburn.

Sam Allardyce thinks his players could stand to lose a few. That's pounds. Not points. They're accomplishing the latter just fine. But for the Blackburn manager, the two are probably related.

So he's called out Benni McCarthy.

Says Fat Big Sam: "We need to get a little bit more body fat off him so he can be more mobile."

Allardyce goes on to say that all of the players need to control their diet. He then blames the demon sugar: ‘Most have been brought up on sugars they shouldn’t have been, and those are addictive. It is not easy to wean yourself off those sort of sweets.'

Allardyce should know, as a kid he ate several candy stores out of business by himself. Okay, he's not mammoth, but he's not exactly svelt. We're just slightly amused that of all the things Allardyce could be addressing to help his team avoid relegation he picked sugar.

Cheer up, Sam. At least they're not addicted to blow. Although, maybe a casual coke habit would help with the weight loss.

6 comments:

Nathaniel said...

Diego Maradona is amused by this story.

/too easy?

Jacob said...

Riquelme is not amused by Maradona'a amusement, and has quit the thread.

phil said...

Mido would have been amused, but could not be bothered to look up from his plate of pastry long enough to smile.

The Fan's Attic said...

andy reid just crossed ewood park off of his list of potential future employers.

Email us at said...

Wenger is now complaining that Arsenal would be second right now if his team hadn't booked a trip to Thailand in the offseason.

jjf3 said...

Seriously, were you guys trying to goad me into commenting from work today?
As for BFS, follow your own advice, you horrible genius of survival!!

That said, Benni's the target? Really? I can only assume that means he's been lazy in training, and this is Sam's way of getting his attention, because 2 Bennis weigh about as much as 1 Roberts, and we're the team with 86-yo(?) Tugay playing meaningful time...