Guhreat Buhritin? Get tae Fook.

A Great British team for the Olympics in 2012? Novel idea. But the paranoid Scots, including former national team boss Craig Brown, think this idea is some crafty ploy by FIFA to cut down on the number of European teams as part of some grand scheme to destroy Scottish football.

I think Mr Brown and his compatriots are just worried that none of his countrymen will make the team. He is right there, but he shouldn't worry about his national side being dissolved. If he thinks for one second that English fans will allow a Great Britain team to become a long-term fixture, killing 136 years of national pride, he is more delusional than George W. Bush.

"I don't trust FIFA." That's the message coming from Craig Brown and the Scottish FA, backed by Scottish National Party member Christine Grahame and first minister Alex Salmond. Apparently Sepp Blatter is out to destroy the Scottish national team because of the influx of countries now competing since the break-up of the Soviet Union and Yugoslavia. Blatter also wants to slaughter their first-born, rape their women and steal the recipe for haggis.

I have not heard such a load of nonsense since Colin Powell stood up in Washington with some 15 year-old pictures of a building site in Iraq and claimed it housed weapons of mass destruction.

Let's debunk the fears of the Scots and put a few things straight, shall we?

FIFA are trying to create a GB team and destroy the Scottish national team!

What a load of tosh. And even if such an outlandish claim were to be true, do the Scots really believe that the English FA and the proud fans of England would allow such a thing? Seriously. You drive through any town or City in England during a major competition and you are confronted with one flag bearing the cross of St. George after another. Row upon row of acknowledgment for 136 years of history in the World of football including a World Cup win. Not a single Union Jack will be seen.

English people are extremely proud of the national team and what it represents, whether or not the team underachieves with it's guarantee to lose on penalties every two years. Are Scottish people the only people proud of their country? You wouldn't find the Welsh interested in a merger either.

The truth of the matter is that historically the Olympics has always had 'Great British' athletes and not Scottish, Welsh, English or Northern Irish ones. It's the way it is. If Scotland does not want to participate in a Great British soccer team for the Olympics in 2012 then neither should Scotland's runners, swimmers, weight-lifters or any other athlete from the many sports that make up the Olympiad.

But no... the Great Britain team for Beijing featured 31 Scottish athletes and who was at the forefront of celebrating their efforts for Great Britain? One Mr Alex Salmond, the first minister for Scotland. The same man opposing a Great British football team for 2012. What a hypocrite.

"The dedication, drive and determination each of our Olympians has shown is inspirational. Their efforts will not only provide encouragement to other athletes but also inspire many ordinary men and women to take up a sport and make healthier, positive changes to their lifestyle." -Alex Salmond.

Just not football, eh Mr Salmond?

Maybe Liz McColgan would like to give back all of her medals? What about David Wilkie, shall we wipe out his achievements too, Scotland?

Giving them back folks? I thought not. This year's Scottish/Great British medal winners.

It seems as if young Scottish athletes are not only proud to be part of Team Great Britain, but encouraged too, so why the objections over a Great British Soccer team? What's the real reason behind all this?

Well it's just a theory but I can't name one Scottish player that would make the team. Can you? So the Scottish fear embarrassment in the form of a Great British soccer team without any Scots. That's more like it isn't it Scotland? They can make a fuss and make a stink if they wish, we can all see the transparency of this hypocritical farce of a campaign.

Should a Great British team compete in the Olympics in 2012 it is highly likely that the team will have a Scottish manager. Now there is something to be proud of Scotland.

I think there is just one thing left to say. There is absolutely no chance of a long-term GB team outside of the Olympics. So Scotland, you can sleep at ease tonight, your FIFA World ranking of 33rd is very safe.

-Bigus.