Newcastle's want away owner Mike Ashley reckons that interim manager Joe Kinnear is better than Fabio Capello. Wow, that's a bold statement, lets take a look at the two gentlemen in question and see how he came to that conclusion.
So first off I can see why Mr Ashley rates Kinnear. He has done a pretty good job at Newcastle thus far. He has helped them out the relegation zone, they have stopped leaking goals and they are picking up the points and heading in the right direction. This could just be a honeymoon period that any new manager could have achieved or maybe Kinnear is just that good. Either way, to call him 'better' than Fabio Capello takes more than some balls, it takes a large amount of crack and about 10 pints of Special Brew.
Let's compare the two.
Fabio Capello. 62 years old. Current job: England manager.
Last 4 results: Croatia 1 England 4, England 5 Kazakhstan 1, Belarus 1 England 3, Germany 1 England 2.
Honors as manager.
Seria A: 5 titles with AC Milan and Roma.
La Liga: 2 titles with Real Madrid.
4 Italian Super Cups, the European Super Cup and the Champions League.
Joe Kinnear. 61 years old. Current job: Newcastle interim manager.
Last 4 results: Chelsea 0 Newcastle 0, Middlesbrough 0 Newcastle 0, Newcastle 2 Stoke 2, Portsmouth 0 Newcastle 3.
Honors as manager.
Oh...There actually aren't any. Not one. Nada! Nichts! Ugh..This is a little embarrassing, I thought there might be something? Alas no. Nyet!
So as you can see, crack cocaine and copious amounts of booze are required to compare Joe Kinnear to Fabio Capello. Unless of course you are Mike Ashley, and then the reason is that you are a fat doofus who knows about as much about football as Clive Woodward.
-Bigus.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Pass The Crack Mike
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Fabi-oh-so Confident.
Can you feel it? Can you?
Something special is happening to the England team, something unusual. Something that has been missing for a loooooong time. Consistency has returned, bringing its old friend confidence along for the ride. Last night's win in Berlin was the absolute confirmation that many England fans needed before welcoming the confidence back, the confidence to believe in the England team once again.
Germany 1 England 2. We are back people. Can you f*cking believe it?
Bigus is on cloud nine this morning. Watch out world, here come England!
So what is it that Fabio is doing right? For the most part, this is the same bunch of players that Steve McClown was ruining. Is it just confidence? Well I mentioned before that simplicity is a major factor.
For example, England's shape has been consistently similar under Capello, even with different personnel. The depth McClaren failed to inspire has allowed for it. Take last night for instance; Walcott's injury really didn't affect Capello's desire to play an out-and-out winger on the right. Shaun Wright-Phillips was ready to oblige. The absence of both Coles was not important either. Bridge took Ashley's place and Stuart Downing took his opportunity to impress the Italian coach with a solid showing. It was Downing's free kick that provided John Terry's winning header.
Depth was also available at the heart of the midfield and up top. Carrick's performance may make it difficult for the missing Lampard to claim his place back, thanks to his performance that many journalists declared 'man of the match' worthy.
Up top, Rooney's work rate and ability to find space was matched by the impressive Gabby Agbonlahor. England's depth consists largely from young players with little experience and this is a glowing testament to Capello's ability to organize and inspire confidence. Agbonlahor, Young, Walcott, Downing are all hungry and will play a large part in England's future. Others in last nights squad were there to make up the numbers. I cannot see Parker, Lescott or Bullard in the big picture but should injuries strike, it is reassuring that Capello is just the man to get the best from the second best.
Earlier in the week, Capello had shown disappointment and doubt over the numerous bumps and bruises that left his squad short. The exodus of key players to minimal knocks had threatened to render the game with Germany one of no importance. That's certainly how Premiership managers saw the fixture. But to English folk, a showdown with the auld enemy is an important historic fixture that is always welcomed. One that feeds national pride.
In recent years Germany had inflicted pain on England, winning in the last game at the old Wembley. England returned the favor by stuffing Germany in Munich. Last night's game was important for a number of reasons. A true acid test of England in the Capello era. Could he dig deep into the talent pool and delver a win in Berlin, with such key players as Rooney, Lampard, Joe Cole and Rio Ferdinand absent? In front of 75,000 taunting Germans? Not only did he answer that question but he did it in style. England looked comfortable for most of the game. Upson poked home to give England the lead after German stopper Rene Adler failed to punch a corner clear. The lead should have been extended in the second half, when the in-form Darren Bent broke through and created an open goal opportunity, only to shank his shot wide of the post. Terry then gave Germany a lifeline as he failed to deal with a long ball and Patrick Helmes nipped in to to slide the ball through Scott Carson's legs to finish. Lots of players dedicate goals to loved ones and some sick bastards dedicate them to drink-drivers, but Helmes dedicates his goals to the memory of his dead dog. How normal.
England's determination to win was highlighted ten minutes later when Shaun Wright-Phillips latched onto a ball 10 yards into the German half before dispatching a thumping shot that hit the post from 25 yards. England restored the lead on 83 mins when Captain John Terry headed home the winner from Downings free kick. It was a magnificent header. Terry's effort handed the Germans their first defeat in Berlin since 1973. Brazil were the victors then and that's not a bad act to follow.
Capello is now unbeaten in 7 games and has won his last 5, with his only defeat coming in the friendly with France back in March. England sit at the top of their World Cup qualification group and wins in Croatia and Germany have filled the nation with pride, and of course, confidence.
Something special is happening alright, and I for one am as excited as a bar full of woo girls when 'Sweet Home Alabama' hits the juke box.
I'll be enjoying this one for a while dear readers. At least until after lunch. Maybe I'll go for liverwurst on a Kaiser roll, topped with Colmans mustard of course.
-Bigus.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Capello, the Simple Fellow.
Belarus 1 England 3
-----
4 games, 14 goals, 12 points. Job done.
England's 3-1 win in Minsk last night filled old Bigus with confidence. Not just another 3 points, but the reassurance that Fabio Capello knows what he is doing.
And just what is it that England's super Italian is doing? Keeping it simple!
Sven favored a defensive approach and that arse clown McClaren scratched his bonce routinely, searching for an idea, but Fabio Capello has plenty of those and they have led to winning ways.
For starters, Capello has found a line-up he likes and has given them time to gel. While Sven was successful in qualifying, he tinkered with the line-up and found it hard to find a front two he bellieved in. McClaren was so inept in his selection, he would change formations from one game to the next, whereas Capello has been the complete opposite: stoic and determined in his ways. It's a breath of fresh air. No Owen? How dare he! Crouch on the bench? Tough. "I am Capello and I like Heskey!"
Whilst Fabio still struggles to accomodate Gerrard and Lampard, he has found security in the rest of his improving 4-4-2. Rooney and Heskey understand each other up front and the back four have been consistent. The back line has become inter-changeable and deep under Capello. No Terry? No Cole? NO PROBLEM. Upson and Bridge were the latest pieces to the party and both looked comfortable in Minsk.
Where Capello's simplicity has paid off has been in Englands substitutions. He does not tinker with the shape of the team during a game. Walcott off? Shaun Wright Phillips on. Heskey off? Crouch on. Like-for-like changes that have helped England stay consistent in their endeavours and top of their qualification group, a group that looked fairly trecherous when it was drawn. Ukraine and Croatia are no pushovers!
The midfield conundrum is an entirely different matter for Capello. Who would not want to partner the best two central midfielders in the country? It's a poser that will continue to haunt this current England squad all the way to the World Cup. Gerrard was excellent last night but it's clear that he and Lampard find it extremelly difficult to connect with one another.
But as Fabio wrangles with his midfield, he can find comfort in the rest of his side. Heskey and Rooney look comfortable together as do their back-ups, Crouch and Defoe, and the back four look set with plenty of positional depth on the bench.
Belarus's only goal last night came from a defensive lapse as Brown was caught napping at the back post, but such a lapse can be tolerated when your side looks comfortable every time they move forward. And England did, especially in the second half. Even with the odd couple sharing space in the midfield, England looked comfortable. Walcott struggled at times but the youngster's treble in Zagreb has given him a HUGE reputation to live up to, and England fans MUST be patient.
The opening goal of last night's match came early after the exceptional Rooney turned his marker and moved into space only to spot Gerrard rushing to the ball. He backed off and the resulting shot from 30 yards was unstoppable, finding its way into the bottom-right corner of the net.
20 minutes later England fell asleep briefly and paid the price as Belarus found a way into the box and a cheeky Igor Stasevich cross found Pavel Sitko unmarked as Wes Brown watched on.
After that, it was all England. Heskey worked the ball wide on 50 minutes and crossed low for Rooney to finish to make it 2-1 and England continued to press.
Rooney capped an outstanding outing with a brilliant solo effort with 15 or so minutes remaining, taking on two players before wrong-footing the keeper and sticking the ball in at the near post.
Rooney has 5 goals in the last 3 games and has been nothing short of a revelation for England of late. He is still 22! Hard to believe, eh? He seems to have been around forever! He has found a true partner in Emile Heskey and he is making the most of it.
England should have scored a fourth towards the end of last night's game but Gerrard refused to acknowledge his left foot as he was put through to an empty goal. The outside of his right boot found the post. A simple left-footed swipe would have found the net with ease.
Overall Capello has to be pleased. He doesn't have an obvious answer to the great midfield question that graces every breakfast table debate in England, but at this point, who cares?
Croatia away? Done. Belarus away? Done. Kazakhstan? Done. As my mate Garry 'Hoops' would say, "job's a good 'un!"
England sit at the top of the heap today, 5 points clear of Croatia with a confidence they have been lacking in recent times.
I for one have been impressed with Capello's attitude and team selection. The players seem happy and the goals are flowing. There is finally a consitency to the line up and bench.
The simple truth is, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. It's that simple. It's Capello simple.
- Bigus.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
That's it... destroy the village
Is there anything at all that's salvageable?
Thankfully, it was only a friendly, but a last-gasp, comedy-of-errors, listless 2-2 draw at home to the Czech Republic is hardly the stuff that builds confidence. Fabio Capello once again ignored all the promises and fantastical talk he wooed the press with upon first being hired, and trotted out a team so devoid of imagination and experiment that Glenn Hoddle could have picked it.
We're 2 years from the World Cup (that is, assuming we make it, ugh), and this is the XI selected by Fabio to get some valuable playing time and experience:
GK - David James (age 38)
LB - Ashley Cole (27)
CB - Rio Ferdinand (29)
CB - John Terry (27)
RB - Wes Brown (28)
LM - Frank Lampard (30)
CM - Gareth Barry (27)
RM - David Beckham (33)
LF - Steven Gerrard (28)
RF - Wayne Rooney (22)
ST - Jermain Defoe (25)
Brilliant, isn't it? The same cast of indentured characters, several of whom will surely be too old to participate in the World Cup itself! Thus, why waste the time? It's not like we need to play it safe in friendlies and make sure we win points... there's none to play for!
The second half saw little improvement, as the players of the future saw the last 20 minutes or so without any real chance to assert themselves on the pace of the game.
It's a very depressing thing to see ones country struggling like this. Years of the same-old, same-old rubbish from a string of uninspired managers who seemingly picked the same 15 players for every match, regardless of domestic form. The sea change for me was the continued selection of Beckham (yes, I know, I dog him frequently), who was rewarded for taking a big payday to play in a more sedate league with plenty more caps for his country, not to mention that the quality of his individual play at the Galaxy has been far from dominant either! (Lest we forget that Huckerby outshone him in their recent meeting)
And yet, nothing changes! The media get sick and vitriolic, Capello answers the criticism and then we sit and watch the entire thing repeated over and over again from match to match.
Capello promised us the world, a brave, exciting new vision of an England team selected on merit, a novelty for us, and the guarantee that new faces and new talents would be given every chance to shine in all these pointless friendlies leading up to our World Cup qualification group.
In reality, we've seen nothing to get excited about. Andorra is just around the corner as qualification begins, but it's not difficult to imagine a match-up much tougher than it should be. And the longer Fabio continues to ride these ineffectual horses into the ground, the longer our disappointment and failure continues.
[The strain was enough for Brian Barwick to quit yesterday... the entire FA should be dismantled and rebuilt again until the national team is something worth cheering about]
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Quitting so soon?
Fabio previews 'retirement'.
News this afternoon from new England Coach Fabio Capello. England will be his last job as a coach and he is retiring when his contract is up in 4 years. Good to see he has his mind on the job at hand and not on a beach holding a cocktail.
England fans shouldn't panic yet though....
"I would like to end my career having made an impact at a World Cup."- Fabio Capello.
Well that's good news. I seem to remember Graham Taylor saying something similar, although I am sure Wolves and Villa fans would have wanted Taylor to retire after being England manager also.
It does seem a little odd that Fabio should even bring this up at this time just as he embarks on a long campaign to qualify for the World Cup in 2010. A world cup in which (according to the F.A) England are expected to make the semi's. Of course we will then lose on penalties and half the squad will wait at least a month before signing on to do a Pizza Hut commercial.
Pizza Pillock. Southgate chows down after penalty miss.
I would just like to announce I will be retiring in 2035.
-Bigus
Monday, May 12, 2008
England should probably start looking for a new manager
Ever since Fabio Capello took over the England job, there have been rumo(u)rs that he had some outstanding legal problems. Now, it seems that those problems are catching up to him. Further, said problems might land him in jail for up to six years. How does one say "We fucked up" in the Queen's English anyway?
Yes, it seems the English FA did mot perform due diligence in checking Mr. Capello's background. Capello is close to being charged with perjury as Italian investigators confirmed that his testimony from an earlier trial is under investigation. He is not being investigated for outright lying, but for withholding information. However, in Italy, the sin of omission is as great as the sin of commission, at least in the court of law.
So what does the FA have to say about this? Well, not much. An FA spokesman said, "This is a private matter and will remain so." Huh. I'm not so sure that millions of English football fans will agree with you when you have to hire a new coach during the next qualifying cycle. Still, at least the FA doesn't have to worry about Capello exiting during the Euros. I mean, he can exit at that time, it just won't be detrimental to the team.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Fabio Capello: hides his finances as well as his plan for fixing England
A while ago, we blogged on a rather innocuous story to do with Fabio Capello and his involvement with an Italian corruption probe.
It was, at the time, nothing much to write about, a throwaway post, a space-filler. His son, Pierfilippo, even gave the BBC a wonderful sound bite back in the day about the boring, humdrum nature of such investigations. Yawn. Lame. Move on.
Well, the passage of time has spiced things up a bit, because it turns out little Fabio wasn't entirely honest with the authorities when they initially called him as a witness in the Juventus case.
I'm thinking they must have asked him what his ideas were for fixing the lifeless shitdump that is the English national team, and he said he had no idea.
It's so bad that an Italian prosecutor is thinking of bringing a criminal case against Capello.
Good thing we're not in Euro '08 then, eh?
The England coach worked under Mr Moggi at Juventus until 2006, but it was his time in charge of Roma between 1999 and 2004 which most interested the court. In court, he denied having been put under pressure over the management of players during his time at Juventus and Roma." In that interview the coach said he knew many players were "gravitating towards that company". But when asked further in court about the interview, and details he had given in the initial inquiry, the England coach was less forthcoming. Mr Capello is not thought to have lied, but the prosecutor believes he was evasive and at times obstructive in the evidence he gave." I'm sure that like most things in life, this story will dribble to a disappointing, rather mundane conclusion. However, it's not exactly a good sign when you get caught hiding something, because that obviously implies that there was something worth hiding in the first place. It's also not good because the England team is neck-deep in enough fucking shambles as it is, and yet now their talisman, the man charged with bringing the national team back into relevance and power, is probably a fucking cheat and a liar. In retrospect, was Steve "The Ginger Idiot" McClaren really that bad? [On second thoughts, don't answer that]
From the BBC:"The court case, which is ongoing, relates to the GEA World sports agency. The former Juventus general manager Luciano Moggi, who was at the centre of Italy's match-fixing scandal in 2006, and Davide Lippi, son of the former Italy coach Marcello, are among the defendants.
It gets better:"Mr Capello, 61, was also asked about an interview he gave to the Corriere dello Sport newspaper about GEA and their alleged monopoly of players.
[yeah, I quoted pretty much the whole article, what of it?]
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Fire Capello!
I just finished watching England blunder its way to a 1-0 defeat to France. Well, actually, I was at work, so I just finished watching highlights of England blunder its way to a 1-0 defeat to France, and one thing is absolutely clear. It’s time for England to find itself a new manager.
How is it possible for this artard Capello to consistently fail to get results when he has the world’s top talent at his disposal? I mean, any idiot could win with a team that features Wayne Rooney as the lone attacking threat. And did I mention that England's squad also includes Glen Johnson and David Bentley?!
Yes, Fabio Capello’s time has come and gone, and it’s time for the FA to consider drastic changes. Bring in Mourinho, or Bilic, or ANYBODY. As they say of my equally pathetic Detroit Lions, it's time to “restore the roar” ... of the Three Lions.
There are simply oodles and oodles of top-class English players just waiting in the wings to replace aging-yet-still-extremely-talented players like David Beckham and Gary Neville. Why aren't those amazing players playing? And yet, and yet, it's just the same old useless strategy mistakes of picking the best English players available.
That's why Fabio must go. England doesn't deserve anything less.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Seriously, David Beckham? Fuck off.
David Beckham.... I am absolutely sick of you. I cannot stand you. I loathe your constant whoring in the media, I despise the fact that you're more one-dimensional than Wimbledon FC circa-1990, and I am having trouble processing the fact that you're in the England squad.
I wish you weren't, but I begrudge you the ceremonial farce that is your 100th cap in a meaningless friendly against France, and I would love to think that we're finished with this issue.
But of course, Beckham could not let a microphone go unpolluted by a soundbite.
He wants to beat Peter Shilton's all-time England caps record.
Beckham.... I fucking hate you.
You don't deserve it, not by a considerable margin. We have years of un-creative management decisions to thank for the fact that you even got as close as you did to 100, let alone making it to the century itself. Of course, you can't keep your mouth shut, can you? You weren't finished with that last quote, not by a long shot: We have been on tour and played a few games. I've got the fitness I needed. Ruud Gullit [his coach at LA Galaxy] has been working us hard, doing double sessions, for the last three weeks. It has been good for me."
His quotes are so wonderful. Feast on his brilliance:"As much as reaching 100 is a milestone, I want to carry on for quite a few years yet. I'd have turned round and retired if I didn't. I wouldn't be here if I felt I couldn't physically do it any more. I feel I can offer something."
For Christ's sake, admit that you're lucky to get to where you are now. And yet, you take that good fortune and media pressure, and you turn it into this? You want 26 more caps? You're 32 and anonymous in actual football matches. You can go fuck yourself."I've never had a major amount of pace. If I get two or three yards I'll put the ball where we need to score. I'm always going to, whether I'm playing in Spain, England or the US. I can switch from playing in the US to playing on Wednesday against one of the best teams in the world.
Please, just stop. Seriously. Enjoy your 100th, thank your lucky stars that you made it this far, and please... stop bothering the world with your talking. Go enjoy your ugly robot wife, and be happy with your pile of money.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Corruption: as Italian as pizza-flavoured gelato
Actual trophy: second best to trophy wife, but what can you do?
Barely a fucking month into his tenure as England's national manager, and Capello's in the news for all the wrong reasons.
Italian prosecutors launched an inquiry into Capello's earnings as Juventus boss as part of a wider probe into allegations of corruption at the club.It sounds worse than it is, apparently. Basically, Italian authorities are much more interested in corruption within the club, but the law states that because Capello earned more than 200,000 euros a year while there, he has to be looked at as part of the routine.
Capello's son Pierfilippo spoke to the BBC, maintaining Daddy's innocence:
"This is a simple investigation involving his fiscal position. This kind of investigation is going on with a number of famous people in Italy with big cash flows. They want to understand how he was paid at Juventus. We're very confident about it and comfortable that everything is clear."Still, it's never good to be associated with corruption. Look at Enron. Look at Bruce Grobbelaar. Look at Volkswagen. Look at Samsung.
Capello is confident the inquiries will amount to nothing, but it doesn't look good on the old resume. Is it too late to chase Guus Hiddink for England boss? He'd be a excellent fi..... oh. Wait. Never mind.
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