UF After Dark: He's Still About a Hundred and Fifty Pounds Shy of Being Divine

What good are family for if not to embarrass the God fearing tar out of you?

That John Waters lab experiment gone amiss is actually Wayne Rooney's cousin, Stephen.

He puts on women's clothing and hangs around in bars.

If only it stopped there. According to the accompanying article—and we use that term in the loosest sense possible as the Sun piece is all of a 65-word blurb (hope their writers aren't paid by the word)—the coattail riding 25-year-old not only "regularly dons skirts and frilly knickers to become Coleen Smellybean, a cheeky reference to the Man U star’s wife Coleen, on nights out" but he's also recorded a song or something as his alter queen ego.

It's a pretty good 65 words though as there is still a reference to something called the Tranny Shack.

There are more pics and more embarrassing cousins to be found here (totally NSFW as there is boobage, both male and female) .

If you're too scared for your job to click the second link we can give you this lovely shot of Rooney cousins Steve and Natalie. If you can manage before you have to look away, get a glimpse of the massive Everton tat on his arm.



Okay, just want to make sure you get a good enough look that you have nightmares, too.