He Probably Wasn't Going to Beat Out Vela Anyway

If the momentum of the US racing quickly toward becoming a Third World economy doesn't slow quickly this trend might reverse itself, but for the time being our porous southern border might finally be paying dividends where it matters most: Soccer.

According to this piece in the Washington Post, Jose Francisco Torres—and no, his armband didn't say he was a Red, wrong Torres—will likely make an appearance for the USMNT in the next week against either Cuba or Trinidad and Tobacco (intentional).

The significance of this?

Though born and raised in the eastern Texas city of Longview, Torres is eligible to represent Mexico because of his father's roots. And having evolved into a starter for Pachuca, one of the Mexican league's most decorated clubs, he has appeared on the Mexican national team's radar.

But as FIFA rules stipulate, one you're capped for one country, your ass is there's for this life and the next (and yes, there is both soccer and nation-states in the afterlife... Sorry, John Lennon was totally wrong). So by appearing in a US kit, Torres, in the blue and white above, can only ever play on the world's stage for the Red White and Ranked 20th (or thereabouts).

Torres isn't alone in making the US his preferred international home, Michael Orozco, who has Mexican-born parents and plays on the backline for the Mexican club San Luis, also made a run north of the border when he was capped for the US U-23 team in Beijing.

"The situation is unique because they are eligible for two countries. So you are balancing those issues with whether the player is ready for the national team," U.S. Soccer Federation President Sunil Gulati said. "And because they are part Mexican, we only have to pay them a fraction of what we'd pay American born players."

Okay, we totally made up the second half of that quote.

It's not like Torres, who stands at a Messi-like 5'5", has been captured against his will and is being enslaved to a USMNT jersey. No, he willing chose it. It's his dream. He even said so. "It's my choice and I made it. My dream was always to play for the U.S. national team."

See, America is still the land where dreams can come true, even if it will soon be as bankrupt as Iceland.