Swiss models: Sultry
Turkish models: Likely to be thrown in prison.
Once again, join me after the jump for line-ups and shenanigans.
The starting roster for the Switzerland:
GK - Benaglio
DEF - Magnin (C), Senderos, Muller, Lichtsteiner
MID - Barnetta, Fernandes, Inler, Behrami
ST - Hakan Yakin, Derdiyok
The starting roster for the Turks:
GK - Volkan Demirel
DEF - Altintip, Asik, Cetin, Baita
MID - Gokdeniz-Karadeniz, Metin, Aurelio, Turan
ST - Kahveci (C), Tuncay Sanli
Repeat warning: In order to watch the game in HD and live-blog at the same time, I am running things on my laptop, using my wireless network. So, any outages in updates are due to my running upstairs to power-cycle my router. You've been warned.
Second live-blog of the day, second masturbation comment related to my wireless network. I'm frightened.
00:00 - As Goat has noted, ESPN is all over the argy-bargy from the last time these two teams met. To be fair, the chance of another fight is the most captivating part of this match.
Apparently, the Swiss have Gary Gygax on the bench. I do not think that he will be very useful - he's not very mobile.
00:01 - And we're off!
00:15 - Senderos commits a foul. Kill me now.
01:00 - Turkey with the first corner of the game, but it leads to nothing.
02:37 - Giants WR Plaxico Burress says that he will not practice until his contract is finalized. Wait, what?
03:35 - Long ball to Magnin, and the Swiss captain is offside by approximately 230 yards.
05:01 - The first Turkish shot on goal is an easy save for Benaglio. The Turks have had the greater possession so far.
Call me fey, but I'm actually digging the Turks' baby blue shorts/socks.
08:47 - Deep ball by Turan into the box, but Benaglio gets up for the catch.
10:11 - Yet another long ball over the top by the Swiss, but Yakin is unable to catch up. HE'S THROWING THE MATCH!
12:10 - A good shot of how hard it's raining in Basel for this match. The poor turf conditions favor the Turks, as the Swiss are too orderly to enjoy it.
14:40 - Free kick for the Swiss, and Yakin delivers a dangerous ball which falls all the way to Demirel.
16:00 - Fernandes fouls Turan from behind, leading to a Turk free kick from 40 yards. The ball is played around the midfield until Metin is fouled, leading to a second free kick. The ball is delivered from 35 yards by Kahveci, but it curls very wide.
19:00 - Shot on goal from Inler, but Demirel deals with it well, considering the conditions.
22:10 - Senderos attempts a clearance and it lands at the feet of Balta. The ensuing ball played in towards Benaglio results in a clusterfuck, and nothing comes of it.
23:00 - On the counter-attack, Yakin gets off a nice strike which is parried to the side by Demirel. The resulting corner comes out to Magnin, who is fouled by Karadeniz, leading to a dangerous free kick from 25 yards. The dead ball results in a shot on goal by Barnetta, saved by Demirel. The ensuing corner from Yakin is poor, and played out by the Turks.
The pitch is getting increasingly soggy, leading to sloppy tackles and poor touch on the ball. If the English had qualified, it's the type of weather that they would enjoy.
27:30 - Turkey draws a free kick right on the line to the right of Benaglio's goal, although it looked to be a bit of a dive. The free kick by Kahveci is drilled into the 6, and Benaglio tips the ball off Turan's head, on to the post, and out.
30:00 - Kahveci shows the ref that his jersey was ripped on a scrum off a dead ball, but the ref seems indifferent. As the ref is ignoring Kahveci, Tuncay comes in from behind on Inler, resulting in our first yellow card, which displeases the captain Kahveci even more.
31:30 - GOAL! Switzerland 1 - Turkey 0. After a quick restart the ball is sent over the top to Derdiyok, who plays it across the goal mouth. Despite being stopped by a puddle in front of goal, Yakin gets on the end and puts it in. 2 players of Turkish descent link up for the goal against Turkey.
34:00 - Yakin receives a cross right in front of goal, but the pitch causes the ball to skip and he mis-hits it out of bounds.
The pitch at this point is literally a bog - any passes on the ground are slowed down almost to a stop by the amount of water. Although there are no flashes of lightning, if the water keeps coming down this hard, the game may be abandoned. Right now the style of play is along the lines of Portsmouth (Switzerland) - Blackburn (Turkey) game, with Pompey having stolen a goal.
36:30 - Yakin called offside coming in alone on Demirel, but the call appears questionable.
With their jerseys being white and tight, this rain is doing wonders for the photo-model opportunities of the Turkish team.
39:41 - Long free kick into the box from Altintop, but Benaglio is sure-handed. Worth a try, since the ball is wet and Benaglio had to be very secure.
40:34 - Yellow card to Aurelio for fouling Behrami from behind. A very questionable card, as Behrami had lost the ball due to the poor pitch and Aurelio barely touched him. The resulting free kick is hit into the wall by Yakin.
44:20 - Derdiyok with a nice backheel for Behrami, but once again the pitch slows down the ball and kills the attack.
And the first half ends. The pitch is really poor at this point - the players will definitely need to change studs/boots. The biggest effect of the rain is likely to be felt by the GKs - on several occasions Benaglio has come out for a long ball for Turkey on the ground only to realize that the pitch had slowed the ball to the point that it wouldn't reach him. At this rate I wouldn't be surprised to see a GK come out for a save and get beaten because the ball slowed down to the point where another striker was able to get onto it.
Every time Julie Foudy says something stupid, God kills a kitten.
45:00 - Karadeniz and Metin off for Senturk and Topal for Turkey.
45:34 - Turkey with a quick ball over the top, cleared for a corner. The resulting ball is shite, and knocked out for a Turk throw.
46:30 - Durdiyok draws a foul by splitting two Turkish defenders, but the free kick is also shite. The Turk counter-attack results in a foul by Inler. The ball in by Kahveci is handled by Balta, which results in a yellow for the Turk.
The rain seems to have slowed down quite a bit, but there is absolutely no chance of the pitch drying off.
49:55 - Barnetta makes a nice run to the end line, but is dispossessed. The goal kick is long to Turan, but he immediately turns the ball back over.
51:50 - Through ball for Senturk, but he is offside. The resulting dead ball is sent long to Yakin, but he commits a foul to get into position.
54:20 - A long ball to Durdiyok goes toward the touch line, and he slides in and gets a piece of Altintip. Yellow card to Durdiyok.
56:00 - GOAL! Switzerland 1 - Turkey 1. Turan sends in a brilliant cross and Senturk (the substitute) heads the ball past Benaglio, who gets a hand on it (but not enough).
58:00 - The Swiss almost respond immediately, with a long ball headed down to Yakin's feet, although he puts the shot off the defender. The resulting cross is taken, but tempers are starting to flare as Magnin is dragged down in the box. The kick is re-taken, and it takes Demeril 2 punches to clear it.
60:00 - The ball is played off the Turks for a corner, which is cleared out to Magnin, who fires a shot wide.
63:00 - Service into the box from Inler, headed on to the goal by Derdiyok. Demeril makes the save look more difficult than it really was.
64:00 - A botched clearance by the Swiss leads to a shot from Tuncay, but he puts it wide.
Big Phil Scolari named Chelsea manager.
65:30 - Vonlanthen on for Barnetta for the Swiss.
66:30 - Kahveci takes a shot which caroms off Senderos' arm, leading to shouts for a hand-ball. Good no-call there, as Senderos had his arms in tight to his body, attempting to move them out of the way. The resulting corner is headed out by Asik.
68:00 - A brilliant run by Vonlanthen around 3 Turkish players, with the ball then played across the pitch to Durdiyok, and then to Yakin. Yakin's ball into the 6 yard box leads to a foul by the Swiss.
70:05 - Build-up by the Swiss results in a shot on goal by Inler, which is deflected. The AR and ref fail to notice, and award a goal kick, which Demeril manages to take from an incorrect spot (i.e. not on the 6-yard line). Are the Turks playing for a tie?
72:00 - Another brilliant run from Vanlanthen, but he is unable to cross the ball. In the scrum, Cetin picks up a knock and stays down for approximately 17 minutes.
73:00 - A great run on to the ball from Tuncay, who plays it across the goal mouth to Kahveci. Unfortunately, the captain falls one step short and is unable to get there in time.
75:00 - Cabanas on for Fernandes for the Swiss.
75:43 - Ball played out wide to Tuncay, but his pass back through the middle is cleared. The ball only goes out to midfield, and is played back in, leading to a foul. Tuncay takes the resuling free kick and puts it 19 yards over the bar.
78:12 - Cabanas plays the ball through for Lichtsteiner (first we've heard of him all match), who is run off the ball for a goal kick.
79:09 - Turkey once again applying pressure, and the ball is played from Altintop to Aurelio at the 18, but his shot is deflected.
80:24 - Cross into the box from Turkey, but it's too close to Benaglio. His punt is given right back to Turkey, who bring the ball back into the box only to have Kahveci commit a foul.
82:18 - Hand-ball committed by Vonlanthen 35 yards out. Kahveci takes the free kick and it pushed directly to the Swiss who counter in numbers. Vonlanthen receives the ball from Senderos and it comes out to Yakin whose shot is blocked by Demeril, who also blocks (and smothers) the follow-up shot.
84:36 - Kazim on for Kahveci for Turkey. Gygax on for Yakin for Switzerland.
85:48 - Corner for the Swiss comes out to Inler, who is fouled 20 yards out. The resulting free kick is taken by Magnin and it comes off the top of the wall. The ensuing corner comes too close to Demeril, who punches it out. The ball is played back in to Senderos, but he is offside.
88:45 - After a brief attack from Tuncay, Kazim commits a foul. Play goes in the other direction, and the Swiss win a throw-in off of Altintop's clearance.
4 minutes of stoppage time, and for the 4th time this match a Turkish player is bleeding. Asik is stretchered off, but Turkey has no subs left.
90:00 (+01:30) - Asik back on looking like an extra from Saving Private Ryan. The ball goes over the top to Cabanas, but Demeril is out quickly. The Turks counter-attack quickly.
90:00 (+02:00) - GOAL! Switzerland 1 - Turkey 2. Off the counter-attack, Turan receives the ball and strikes it well. It takes a deflection off a Swiss defender and dips in over Benaglio.
And that's it! Game over - after leading 1-0, Switzerland is eliminated from Euro 2008, and are now relegated to merely hosting.
That's it for today, kids. Tomorrow's games will be live-blogged (live-bloge?) by a Spurs supporter, but be nice to him anyway. I'll be back on Friday for the 2nd round of Group of Death matches.