Tuesday, April 1, 2008

A Blog Divided: The Arsenal v. Liverpool Treble

We here at UF are known for two things: (1) our features of sex scandals; and (2) our love of Liverpool or Arsenal (depending on which contributor you ask). So how do we feel about the upcoming Arsenal v. Liverpool treble (CL match on Wednesday, EPL match on Saturday, CL match next Tuesday)? The next week may very well tear us apart.

In preparation for the upcoming matches, I asked each of our Arsenal and Liverpool supporters 5 simple questions (those contributors who support neither club were not invited):

(1) Name one thing that you are willing to give up until the end of the EPL (suck it, Barclay's) season to have your club win all 3 matches

(2) Who is the most important player for your club over the 3 matches?

(3) Would you be willing to trade losses in the 2 Champions League matches for 1 league win?

(4) Why does your clib deserve to win?

(5) What are your predictions for the 3 matches?

First up, the Scousers of the bunch (The Fan's Attic; sven). Individual answers are not attributed in order to protect the guilty.

(1) "I would be willing to give up masturbation...and believe me that is a big sacrifice since I am in the doghouse big time right now."

"A reasonable resolution to the on-going joke that has become our ownership situation. I'd say love/personal life, but that's already back in the shitter."

(Look, Scousers have crappy romantic lives!)

(2) "Ryan Babel - when he plays well, we seem to do well and if he is dangerous from the wing it will help free up Torres."

"Torres would be the likely choice, but after the stinker Reina had at Old Trafford..."

(3) "Yes, so long as neither of those losses were embarassing."


(4) "LFC deserves to win the league match because we need this win more than Arsenal to ensure a CL appearance next season." (Ed. note: BOO-HOO!)

"We deserve to win in the CL because our European pedigree is second to none. In the PL? Um...'deserve' is such a strong word. To secure fourth and to finally get a result against a top domestic club away from Anfield."

(5) "League match 2-1 LFC, CL 3-2 aggregate for LFC."

"In any preview you might read about this match between now and kick-off they WILL include the words 'rotation' and 'owners'. In fact, it's the law." (Ed. note: Fuck, he's right - see response to #1).

Random LFC trash talk: "Fuck Everton, those useless cunts. Oh, about Arsenal? Um, not really." (Ed. note: See? We really love each other around here. We reserve our hate for Everton, Tottenham, ManUre and Chelski).

And now a word from the Gunners (umlaut75; Ian; spectator; precious roy).

(1) "Nothing, really. I think it's a hopeless goal. Now for 2 out of the 3 (League and 1 CL win), I'll attempt to curb my newly-reoccurring cigarette habit."

"Wine and cheese parties." (Ed. note: That's not going to help our street cred)

"I would give up my sneaking sense of pessimism about the way Arsenal's season has turned out. I figure that if Arsenal did manage to win all three games, I might become slightly more optimistic about the rest of the season - which would of course set me up for even more crushing emotions once the Gunners flame out for good."

"I'd give up answering the phone when my ex drunk dials me at 2am on a weekend." (Note to self: Only call precious roy on weekdays)

(2) "Almunia. He's looked pretty pedestrian in the goals he has given up the last couple of matches."

"Gallas. No one likes him, he has been playing like shit, and now he has to deal with Torres."

"Fabregas would be an obvious choice, but I'll go with Hleb. Ever since the ice cream incident in Meelan, he's practically disappeared."


(3) "Before Saturday's second half, no, because it wouldn't have done any good. Now, well, not really."

"Well, given the apparent beating we are taking at the hands of Bolton, I would say advancing in the CL is looking better by the minute." (Ed. note: Where was your faith?)

"Arsenal aren't really in THAT great a danger of falling into fifth, are they?"

"Nope, but I would trade a league loss for 2 CL wins." (Ed. note: We Gunners are good at math)

(4) "There is no reason Arsenal deserves to win."

"We've played like shit for the past six weeks, so we probably don't."

"Because the worst run of play in years can't last forever, and we would be doing Liverpool a favor by finally killing off any chance that Rafa will be their manager next year."

"Because, Arsenal is a better TEAM. Liverpool right now is Torres and 10 guys who hopefully patch together enough quality to make whatever El Nino scores hold up." (Ed. note: Oh snap! He totally dissed Stevie G)

(5) "3 draws. Arsenal through on away goals."

"0-0, 0-0, 5-4 in penalties."

"Mutually assured destruction: Arsenal barely advances in the CL but are so depleted that they have no chance of getting past the next round. A boring draw in the league featuring a ton of players no one has ever heard of, meaning that Liverpool and Arsenal are guaranteed to finish third and fourth."

"The Gunners take 2 out of 3, but I'm not sure which 2."

Random Arsenal trash talk: "At least world leaders like the Emirates."

My own answers:

(1) I gave up giving stuff up during Lent.

(2) Gael Clichy, because I have a man-crush on him.

(3) No, I would rather advance in the CL and lose the league match, since Liverpool aren't catching us for fourth place anyway.

(4) We deserve to win because we play beautiful football, and Eric Cantona tells me that this makes all the difference.

(5) Arsenal through in the CL on aggregate, draw 1-1 in the EPL.

1 comment:

strong like bull smart like tractor said...

As an impartial observer (Chelsea fan, hate both teams pretty evenly): Two draws, in the league match and the Emirates leg of the CL, Liverpool to win at Anfield and advance in the CL.