Monday, December 31, 2007

Tips from the West Ham training ground

On this side of Atlantic, the hypocrites running the NFL flatly deny that gambling is a main pillar of the sport's popularity, despite the fact that the league's draconian injury reporting rules are primarily intended to create the illusion of a level playing field for casual bettors. In England, however, the puritan instinct is less prevalent, so gambling is much more open. For instance, the advertising boards around the pitch sometimes display live odds during matches, and players more or less bet the yearly salaries of most of their supporters during game day bus rides. West Ham's slow start to the season last year was more or less blamed on the propensity of the sterling lads on the team to lose shitloads of money to each other on a regular basis. Keeper Roy Caroll even checked himself into rehab last year for his "gambling addiction". So in honor of the boys from East London, I've been tasked with helping all of you win enough money to occasionally pay your bar tabs at Kinsales. On to this week's action.

Fulham 5/1 to beat Chelsea

No, before you ask, I haven't been masturbating to this. I freely admit that Fulham are absolute shit and definitely look like relegation fodder, despite the best efforts of our boys. But the club is due at least some boost in form by getting rid of the metrosexual and bringing in Roy Hodgson, even though his only previous managerial experience in England was running Blackburn into the ground less than 3 years after they won the Premiership. Chelsea continue to get lucky(bullshit) goals at the death, and at some point the injuries are going to catch up to them. Furthermore, Fulham have actually played quite well against thier local rivals in recent years. So there's your homer/not entirely insane pick for New Years. By the way, you can also get 50/1 odds on Carlos Bocanegra scoring the first goal.

Arsenal 11/4 to draw with West Ham

As a certified fan of le sexy football, this pick is close to heresy. But West Ham did just beat Man U, and they beat Arsenal last spring. Arsene's boys have been spectacular of late, no doubt, but things have been almost too easy. The worrier in me thinks they are due for a slight slip up. And the odds are good, as well.

Everton 7/5 to beat Middlesbrough

For the last several years, I have thought that Boro was a likely candidate for the drop, and this year is no exception. Garreth Southgate is deluded if he thinks he can play some sort of Arsenal-lite style with the crap players he has. And yet we are more than halfway though the season and the club is not in the relegation zone. In fact, they beat Pompey and kept a clean sheet at Fratton Park over the weekend. But I'm betting that Boro hit the sauce on the long ride home, and will suffer a metaphorical, if not literal hangover against Everton. The Toffees were ok against the Gunners in the first half, and then completely fell apart in the second as they got waxed. But they are better than they showed on Saturday, and Everton will be motivated to get a result.

By the way, I use tradesports when I want to indulge my gambling jones, but I don't really want to the explain futures contracts to you people, so the odds are from Ladbrokes.

1 comment:

Precious Roy said...

Tradesport = future of gambling. Pun not intended.