Ancelotti Will Get £1M To Do The Impossible

Newly minted Chelsea manager Carlo Ancelotti has a £1M bonus in his contract if he can keep John Terry upright on penalties win the Champions League while at Stamford Bridge.

When you consider the probable price tags on the players Ancelotti's new club's captain is already telling him to sign—Ribery, Villa—then the bonus seems downright quaint.

Then again, when Satan Claus owns your club, signing the two biggest transfer targets on the market isn't that ridiculous. Even as a relative pittance, the £1M is probably going to stay in Arbramovich's pocket. The backroom talk on UF today was pretty much consensus'ed on Ancelotti not lasting the season at Real London Chelsea.

Read more on "Ancelotti Will Get £1M To Do The Impossible"...

QT: Carlo Ancelotti to prowl the sidelines for Chelsea

It looks like it's a done deal, that Carlo Ancelotti will be leaving Milan and heading to Chelsea. Signing a three year deal, he leaves the Milan squad in tears. We expect Chelsea to be chasing the Champions League next year. Our Chelsea fan boy is still asleep on the left coast of the united states, and unavailable for comment.

Read more on "QT: Carlo Ancelotti to prowl the sidelines for Chelsea"...

Ancelotti to Chelsea? The Papers Seem to Think It's a Done Deal

Ancelotti and Hiddink.... Which one is which???

The Sun has reported that Ancelotti is definitely going to Chelsea this summer. As these things are want to do, this news has quickly been picked up around the world as fact. Done deal. Signed and Delivered.

But you'll have to forgive us if we are still a little suspect.

First off, Milan has denied that Ancelotti is leaving.

Second, despite Hiddink's prostrations that he is definitely heading back to Russia, if Chelsea continue on their current run than I'm sure Abromovich will make Guus an offer he can't refuse. He just seems like the right man for the job. (Want proof? Just compare the post-game interview Hiddink gave after Chelsea beat Liverpool to any that Scolari gave during his tenure.... Scolari always looked like he was having a Maalox moment, while Hiddink looked like everything went according to his plans.)

Third, it's the Sun for criminy's sake.

And fourth, this move would violate Spectator's First Rule of European Football: No sane person would ever leave Italy for England except under extraordinary circumstances.

But there you have it. Summer rumors will be summer rumors: Either they happen or they fizzle out and are replaced by the next surefire, it-definitely-will-happen move. Like C-Ron to Real Madrid.

Read more on "Ancelotti to Chelsea? The Papers Seem to Think It's a Done Deal"...