He's Baaaaaaaack!

Football management can lead to stress, but Pardew clearly fancies some more of that as SFC start on -10 points.

First of all, Southampton were saved from impending doom. A white knight riding a sterling stallion stormed St Mary's saving the day and now they have a new manager they will hope can take them forward. Alan Pardew was today installed at the south coast club and charged with not only overcoming a 10 point deficit but with getting the Saints promoted from League One.



Pardew has signed a 3 year deal and I can see him being there at least 3 years, with relegation being the only issue that could get in the way of a lengthy stay. The Saints realize they need to re-build and next season will be all about avoiding the drop and finishing in a decent position. Anything more will be a bonus. Liebherr doesn't appear to be in a rush, (unlike Norwich) to bounce back to the Colaship and Pardew will get time. A rarity in football these days. Saints fans are just grateful to be still in the game after a summer of administration. Norwich fans are still pissed and all associated with the club will be expecting to bounce right back up.

Southampton's new owner is clearly excited at the prospect of working with his new manager...

"Alan has a strong track record and impressed us with his vision, commitment and ambition. We look forward to working with him." -Markus Liebherr

So let's have a look at that 'strong track record' shall we?

After 299 appearances as a player for Palace and Charlton, Pardew's first step on the managerial ladder came at Reading. He had been in charge of the reserve team and was promoted to manager in 2000. In his first season, Reading made the play-off final but lost out to Walsall. The following year Reading won the league and were promoted to the Colaship (Division 1 back then).

An impressive campaign in Division 1 and a fourth place finish had many teams keeping an eye on his progress. He moved to West Ham in 2003 after resigning from Reading. In his second season at Upton Park, he gained promotion to the EPL.

In 2006, a four-nil defeat to Bolton saw Pardew sacked. West Ham had been on their worst losing streak for 70 years. Two weeks later he took over at Charlton Athletic. They were relegated from the EPL but didn't expect Pardew to save them, they were planning to bounce back. Two years later and Charlton were no closer to a return. He was canned early last season and Charlton never recovered, staying rooted to the bottom of the league and hurtling towards League One were they will start next season.


Saints have some good young players for Pardew to work with, like Adam Lallana above.

Pardew has a lot of experience at this level and works well with young players, of which Southampton have many. They also have some experienced players and I can see them doing well next year. Pardew's first game in charge of his new side will be at home to Millwall on August 8th.

Read more on "He's Baaaaaaaack!"...

Alan Pardew's "Connie Chung" Moment

Former West Ham United manager Alan Pardew must have thought he was doing an interview with Connie Chung. He enjoys Indiana University and Texas Tech University men's basketball. He thinks that Mike Tyson and Kobe Bryant are innocent. This all a round-about way of saying that Alan Pardew doesn't take rape seriously.


During analysis of the Spartak London v. Abu Dhabi City match, Pardew had the following to say about a Michael Essien tackel on Ched Evans:

"Ched Evans is a strong boy but (Essien) knocks him off ... he absolutely rapes him."

Well then. Spokespeople from Rape Crisis England and Wales, as well as Women Against Rape (umm, that seems a bit...redundant), have criticized Pardew for trivializing the violent crime of rape.

Well, Essien does look a little handsy!

Although his co-hosts looked taken aback by his choice of words, there was no immediate on-air apology. However, the BBC has apologized, both for themselves and on Pardew's behalf. This was the latter's first appearance as a talking head for the BBC, and there is no word on whether he will be asked to return or be made to sit in the corner and think about what he has done, although insiders have suggested that it will be some time before he is invited back to Match of the Day. Pardew has apologized, but it seems clear that he was forced to do so by the BBC.

Precious Roy seems to think that Pardew should have put forth the "cabbage" defense:

"I meant that the tackle was cabbage like."

Rape
noun
a plant of the cabbage family with bright yellow, heavily scented flowers, esp. a variety ( oilseed rape) grown for its oil-rich seed and as stockfeed. Also called cole , colza . • Genus Brassica, family Brassicaceae, in particular B. napus subsp. oleifera.


In the spirit of stupid things said concerning footy, The Mirror has compiled the "Top 10 Football TV Outbursts." Obviously we here at UF were gladdened to see Joe Kinnear on the list.

Read more on "Alan Pardew's "Connie Chung" Moment"...

Happy Xmas Al.

Q: What do you get for Christmas when you win just 4 games out of 18 this season, including 10 defeats, leaving your team in the relegation zone heading to league 1?

A: If you are Alan Pardew then 1 million quid (1.7 million bucks), payable in just 12 days from being fired.

But that's not the total he will bag for being a duff manager. Oh no.


Pardew had a clause in his contract stating that he would be entitled to 1 million of his windfall within 12 days of getting the tin-tack. Under-perform, collect 1 million smackers, but Pardew's total haul for leaving Charlton in the bottom 3 of the Championship will be 1.6 million pounds. Nice work if you can get it. Just in time for Christmas shopping (Mrs Pardew has not stopped clapping yet). Pardew was fired on Saturday after Charlton were defeated 5-2 at home to Sheffield United.

The south Laaandan team are in a financial hole at the moment. They have had to sell their best players over the summer and the job at the Valley is not one to be admired. There will likely be no money when the transfer window opens in January. Especially now that the Addicks have to shell out 1.6 million to Pardew as a return for a spot in the bottom 3.

Meanwhile... Former Charlton man Alan Curbishley says he is not interested in a return to the Championship...But he is not ruling it out either....Managers!

“If I did look to come back to management it would be in the Premier League. I’m sure I’ll be linked with the job but we’ll have to see.” -Alan Curbishley.

So roughly tranlsated that's "they have no money for players and I am not interested in taking on a club circling the giant hole to league 1... But if no one offers me a better job in the near future and they get a couple of results in the coming weeks, I am in!

-Bigus

Read more on "Happy Xmas Al."...