It's been a terrible couple of days for Scottish Premier League football. First of all, Setanta's demise has made their expected TV income vulnerable for a cheap double swoop from ESPN and SKY. Then they appointed a new Chief Executive, and boy did they f*ck up with that decision.
Today the SPL's 12 members are sitting down to discuss an offer for their TV rights from SKY and ESPN. The WWL now has a home to show games and needs more content. Setanta's deal was worth 125 million quid over 4 years. It is likely that the SKY/ESPN bid will be a heck of a lot less. Maybe even half! Beggars cannot be choosers!
While the SPL ponders losing a stack of cash thanks to some dubious business decisions by Irish broadcaster Setanta, they also decided to appoint a new Chief Executive in former Norwich City Chief Executive Neil Doncaster. Silly fools.
Doncaster was a controversial figure at Carrow Road and very, very unpopular with supporters. He was fired, I mean he resigned under pressure, as Norwich capped a miserable 08/09 season ending with relegation to League One. Doncasters reign at Carrow Road saw the club slip from the Premier League to the third tier in just 4 seasons. Often involved in controversial decisions, Doncaster's reputation was one of a guy who was keen to sign players on the cheap and of often losing players with bad negotiation skills. He also sat on the Football League Interactive board, where he signed away Norwich City's Internet rights to a company called PTV who often deliver a much criticized, sub-standard product.
Doncaster started his football career as a secretary/solicitor before Norwich made the erroneous decision of making him Head of Operations and then Chief Executive, handing him a place on the board.
While at Norwich Doncaster was known amongst fans as a spin doctor and a master of 'failing to deliver' promises before backtracking. A popular name for the former Chief was 'Doomcaster'.
Good luck Scotland, you are going to need it.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Scottish Football's Double Kick In The Nuts.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
League One Fixtures Are Out! We Care Edition.
The fixtures for next season were revealed today, and while most of you will be looking for the Premier League (ed: suck it Barclays) dates and some of you the Colaship. Two League One teams mean a lot to two of us here at UF Headquarters. The Premier League and Colaship dates will feature on this site in the coming hours and days. But who do Norwich and Exeter play and more importantly...When?
Any of you who read the shite I plonk onto this site regularly will know that I am now fully recovered from the devastating havoc that surrounded Norwich City last season and relegated us to a division housing Brentford and Swindon. The tears have dried and the signings have started to walk through the door. Today's fixtures brought reality to the situation and also excitement. As for Exeter. Their exploits are the focus of Spectator and this season we may fall out a couple of times. We haven't yet, even though we stole their best midfielder last week.
Exeter have done superbly to find themselves where they are. Back to back promotions will see them face the following sides in there first 10 games.
Leeds v Exeter
Exeter v QPR (Carling Cup)
Exeter v Norwich
Exeter v Yeovil
Carlisle v Exeter
Exeter v MK Dons
Gillingham v Exeter
Leyton Orient v Exeter,
Exeter v Tranmere
Charlton v Exeter
As you can see, a very tough start for the League One new boys. Away to Leeds, followed by the Colaship's QPR at St. James and the visit of the mighty Norwich City. Note to self, avoid Spectator at Maison UF on Saturday 15th of August. A local game with Yeovil follows and then a trip to Carlisle. John Barnes' Tranmere visit Exeter on the 19th of September before the Grecians head to the Valley to face Charlton. All in all, Exeter can't grumble. There are a few tough ones in there but if they are to set their stall out this season, then wins at home to Yeovil and Tranmere, and a point a piece vs MK Dons, Leyton Orient and Carlisle need to be on the cards.
On to Norwich.
From the PinkUn messageboard.
Destort: Millwall on Boxing Day, doesn't get anymore festive than that.
SherringhamCanary: Finally we know the real meaning of Boxing Day
Norwich v Colchester
Yeovil V Norwich (Carling Cup)
Exeter v Norwich
Brentford v Norwich
Norwich v Wycombe
Hartlepool v Norwich
Norwich v Walsall
MK Dons v Norwich
Norwich v Charlton
Gillingham v Norwich
Norwich v Leyton Orient
I have to be relatively happy with the first 10 games. The first week is a bitch with two 500-mile round trips after beating Colchester, I mean playing Colchester at fortress Carrow Road on the first day. A trip in the cup to Yeovil is followed by another epic trip to Exeter. If the club has any sense, they will stay down there for four days and avoid the schlep. After Exeter, we head to London to play the Bees of Brentford before returning to Carrow Road to hammer, er... play Peter Taylor's Wycombe. While we have 3 away games back to back and 4 in our first six, we are looking to get off to a flier. We should have a much stronger side than most of our opponents and I will be unhappy if we are not in the top 6 after the first 6 league games after collecting between 10 and 12 points. This season we should be a Juggernaut at home and 3 points in front of a 25,000 strong crowd ought to be a given. Especially when the visitors are used to playing in front of 4-6,000. That said, the visitors will also treat those games as a cup final!
So far City have made two signings and I like them a lot. We have been linked to some very good players and I am confident our squad will be strong for this division. Matt Gill arrived from Exeter after back to back promotions and back to back 'player of the year' awards. He scored 9 goals from midfield last season and being from Norwich he is fired up to finally be coming home to the club he loved but never played for. Yesterday we signed Owain Tudor-Jones. While OTJ has had a horrible time with injuries, including a serious knee operation, his comeback has been successful and a spell at Swindon last season had the Robins hungry to sign him. Swansea were also keen to re-sign him but he has decided to drop a division to play at the heart of our midfield. OTJ is a full Welsh international and currently in John Toshack's plans. He is 6'4" and will add some much needed height to our midfield.
City are also rumored to be after Hartlepool's captain Michael Nelson along with some other League One players. Acquiring League One's best seems to be our plan, a sensible one.
Other fixtures of note, if you want to avoid Norwich City center, Millwall hit town on Boxing Day. Norwich play Leeds at Elland Road on the 17th of September and at home on March the 27th. Read more on "League One Fixtures Are Out! We Care Edition."...
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
The Good, The Bad, The WTF
Dammit. I thought I had found them all. But no. There was one team that wore plaid well before everyone else. In fact, by my count, they wore it almost 40 years before the plaid shirt craze started in Scotland. Dundee FC, the pride of Tayside (not really what they are called) and Bobby McMahon's favorite club (yep), wore this week's abomination back in 1953.
I have to admit that I had my doubts about this shirt actually having existed. Toffs says that the club wore this shirt on a South African tour back in the middle of last century, but the Dundee website makes no mention of what surely would have been a groundbreaking tour on their official website. It wasn't until I did a little digging that I found confirmation, though the colors are a little different (to my eyes). Anyway, without further ado, here it is.
Hmmm. Black, red and teal. What better way to stoke interest in your club abroad, one whose proud history has featured a dark blue kit since the 1880s (regardless of what the badge says above), than to put together these colors in plaid? What kind of branding and marketing genius put it together? I understand the idea of playing to stereotype on the tour, but why not make the plaid in blue, white and maybe a little red?
The answer, if there is one, may lie in historic family colors from the area. Unfortunately, I do not know. I do know that the city's flag and crest are blue and white, so it could not have some from that. If someone has an answer, I'd surely like to hear it.
This shirt does deserve some merit as it is the first (as far as I can tell) to use a plaid pattern in Scotland. But what, really, does that mean? To paraphrase the old joke, first is really no better than second at the Special Olympics. OK, that's harsh on the Special Olympians. I have had some rewarding days volunteering at the Special Olympics. I see no reward in wearing this shirt.
But wait, there's more! In a teaser to a long, upcoming post (or even a series of posts), good ol' BD sent me some pictures of shirts from his closet. Betcha didn't know that Norwish also fell for the plaid craze, did you? Well, you would if you are a Norwich fan of a specific age, I guess. Anyway, East Anglia was a hotbed for the tartan look too, apparently.
But that's not all! It seems that plaids are not dead in the modern day. This week, Celtic released their new European kit for 2009-10. While it's not the shirt that will be plaid, the shorts will be. Please, oh please, let this be the start of a new and wonderful trend.
UF Quick Throw: Gunn Confirmed for Canaries
Bigus is a happy man today, as the Norwich City board have confirmed that the management trio of (most importantly) Bryan Gunn, Ian Butterworth, and Ian Crook will be on board for the 2009-2010 season.
Delia and the rest held a press conference at Carrow Road to announce their plans for the upcoming League 1 season as the Canaries look to jump right back into Championship football in order to preserve Bigus' sanity.
[Management Trio Confirmed]
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Delia Shows She's Got a Pair.
Norwich City this evening have announced that Chairman Roger Munby and unpopular Chief Executive Neil Doncaster have left the club. A rather polite statement from NCFC suggested that the pair 'stepped down' and the board thanked the pair for their efforts. Basically, Delia finally plucked up the courage to open the window and boot Doncaster into the street. Well done girl!
Fans of Robocop will remember a scene where Clarence Boddicker places a dvd into Robocop creator Bob Morton's player and plays a message from his boss, played by Ronny Cox. The discussions between majority shareholders, Michael Foulger, Delia Smith and her husband Michael Wynn-Jones has resulted in a very similar message (reading between the lines) to Norwich City fans. "Delia made a mistake, now it's time to erase that mistake"...tick, tick, BOOM.
Since climbing from secretary to board member and Chief Executive, Doncaster has held a reputation of a puppet master. Cajoling the board with his spin. He sits on the FLI (Football League Interactive) board and was responsible for flogging City's internet and broadcast rights. A move that yielded a sub-par product, and one not available to all supporters! Often bending the truth publicly, Doncaster could spin with the best of them when talking finance. Rumor had it that he was not the best of negotiators and akward when dealing with agents. And we all know bad negiotiators often fail to sign good players.
Munby, the departing chairman never really seemed a problem, well not to those on the outside anyway. He appeared to be a nice fella, always outside the turnstiles at away games, willing to have a natter with the fans.
In fact, Doncaster was also very accessible to supporters. Just this past Monday I emailed him questioning his comments about Norwich City's financial hit due to the drop. He always replied and was up for a debate. Problem is, you would never like the answer you got and never believed that HE believed what he said. Most fans felt that he had his own agenda, one concerning self-preservation at the expense of change, new blood on the board and investment.
Loosely translated the above says..."This ship is drifting out to sea and the captain can't read a map, therefore he has been thrown overboard and the auto-pilot is bringing us in to dry dock until a new captain can be found."Norwich City today confirmed Chairman Roger Munby and Chief Executive Neil Doncaster have both stepped down from their roles at the club....We want to sincerely thank both Roger and Neil for their hard work and commitment to the club over their years working with us.
-NCFC statement.
Majority shareholder Delia Smith has taken a beating in recent years. Lots of fans, especially the young ones, have forgotten what Delia has done for the club in the past. She has done a great job in turning the club into one with a Premiership stadium and fantastic training facilities. The football, however, has been less than fantastic. Still, she delivered a play-off final and a season in the Premiership.
The problem is, that after the drop the mismanagement of money and awful decision making has left my beloved City in a freefall, resulting in relegation this term and a 100 reasons for Delia to do some much needed soul searching. I never in a million years expected Doncaster to get shit-canned though. I was expecting Munby to be made the scape goat and maybe Delia herself. But never Doncaster. I doubt he saw it coming himself!
Doncaster appeared to be a tsar-like figure pushing the board any direction he chose. He had the spin, and they were too nice to question him. That was my impression anyway. Today's news is finally a sign that Delia has decided to aggressively step back into the kitchen (sorry) and take to the heat. To do what she has felt needed doing a long time ago.
There will be more changes coming for sure. Structure of the board, an announcement that Gunn and Co. will carry on as manager (hopefully) and possibly news of some much needed investment. But until then, this is a step in the right direction. A sure sign that Delia wants to seize the club back from the tight grip of failure.
No more Mrs. Nice Chef.
-Bigus
Read more on "Delia Shows She's Got a Pair."...
Monday, May 4, 2009
Post Mortem: Death By Poison.
It was enough to bring some to tears. Others called Canary Call on BBC Norfolk to vent. I thought I'd be more upset, but I had prepared after Monday's game and have been resigned to the drop all week. I am actually just angry, angry at the spineless display at the Valley yesterday and angry at the main reason Norwich City were relegated to League One. Down to the third tier of English football for the first time in 50 years.
Some fans blame the board, other the manager/s and everyone has an opinion. What's important is that the post-mortem is conducted in a speedy manner to allow preparation for an assault on Hartlepool and Exeter. We simply must bounce back like Leicester have this season.
So What went wrong that a team like Norwich can slip from the Premier League to League One in 4 years? What can be done to breathe life back into the club, so we come back bigger and stronger. I'm not going to dredge up the past, rant into history pre our recent flirtation with the Premier League, to me the club took ill in 2006 and died on May 3rd 2009. The good news is that resurrection is possible in the World of football. 
Enough to bring tears.
After the initial shock of a gutless, pathetic display away to Charlton, I spent 4 hours gardening in the rain to avoid the phone. Giving me plenty of time to dissect this season and its grave misgivings. Barnsley won, so any result at the Valley would have relegated us regardless, but the players had no idea at the time and should be ashamed of their efforts.
The final straw. Gutless display at Charlton.
I'm going to call this fenced off section, 'Canary Corner'. It's where I'll go to dwell with miserable thoughts. Hopefully not for too long!
Norwich City were poisoned. The deadly substance? One dose of deadly Roeder. Hang on Bigus...I hear you, yes the board hired him, they allowed his poison to spread through the clubs organs stealing the life from a once healthy entity. I'll get there. I will. That's a long-term problem that we have had. But..The immediate state that the club currently finds itself in. The state of spiraling into the division below, heartless and bleeding heavily...Is down to Roeder.
Now, I'll admit it. Even though he came with a bad reputation, I was not unhappy at his appointment. The club needed someone to shake the tree, he certainly did that, problem was he also ripped all the branches off and siphoned out the sap. Friends emailed me. This is a disaster..He'll take you down. They were right.
Norwich is a community club. The fans are vital. They are the revenue. We are rarely on TV and there is no Russian sugar daddy or face-less benefactor hiding in the lobby of a bank in Bermuda, ready to splash the cash. We are run with what we have. Fantastic fans who fill Carrow Road for every home game and limited resources. Run comfortably it used to appear. But no longer, we are now short of cash. The fans that cram into Carrow Road and huddle around PCs to listen to radio Norfolk ARE the club and when picking a manager, it's not just a task to find a man who can possibly bring success. Another question needs to be answered.
Can he gel with the supporters he will have to face at road shows and events? In the supermarket when his actions are questioned? It's finding a balance. I'll get back to this later. So what did Roeder do?
First of all, the guy swept through the training ground with a sword, sacking people he didn't know for no reason but to be his own man. To leave his mark. He even fired Terry Postle, the kit man. A guy who has been at the club for 12 years! If he'd actually waited a while he may have gotten to know Terry and discovered he is a super bloke. Roeder was out to make the place his, and at any cost. In came new coaches, fitness staff, a motivational guru (even he didn't stick around long) and of course, a new kit man. While Roeder's whirlwind honey-moon period saved the club from relegation, the long term future for any team he manages has always been a disaster. Why should we be different?
Peter Grant may have left us adrift at the bottom of the table and Peter Grant was an awful choice of manager. He affected the team with dreadful signings like Brellier and Murray and the football was dire. A classic case of nice guy, crap manager. The world of football is full of these stories.
However, Roeder has done the real damage, not Grant. So much damage in a short period of time, the dynamic of the club and its relationship with the fans will take some time to repair. The team itself is now in tatters with very few of this years bunch set to be standing on the pitch at the start of next season.
While Roeder is not responsible for the lack of financial investment in the team and the decision to hire two bad managers, he well and truly f*cked us this season with a slew of stupidity. Ineptitude guided by his disgraceful personality and 'my way' attitude.
Roeder could not allow for a popular figure to be within a country mile of his inflated ego and fragile persona, so the first victim of his belligerence was legend Darren Huckerby. The most popular player at the club and one who truly loves Norwich City and wanted to be there. A player who was certainly up for a fight during the tough times. A hero who was sorely missed yesterday at the Valley. A place were no heroes were to be found, just zeroes.
Players who Roeder didn't like were sent to train with the youth team. Young players who were on the verge of breaking into the team, instead of being nurtured, were criticized and sent on loan. Captain and key CB Jason Shackell was stripped of the captaincy and flogged to Wolves. Norwich City used more than TEN different center back partnerships this year. Roeder played left backs there, he played right backs there. Even Sammy Clingan. The heart of the midfield played there.
It doesn't take a football genius to figure out that the lack of a consistent, defensive partnership would end in disaster. The goals we were conceding were a joke. While Middlesbrough loanee Jonathon Grounds may have been a super left back, he was played alongside Doherty in central defence. Before that, loanee and right back Eliot Omosuzi was played there. The goals we conceded over Christmas were not only embarrassing, they cost us dear.
Roeder had his favorites and outside of that, players were stepping on egg-shells. He loved Mark Fotheringham. A below average player who talked a good game and backed it up by ball-watching action in the box while he strolled back casually. This was Roeder's captain. If Roeder was poison then Fotheringham was the needle. 
Glenn Roeder: Poison. An arrogant, ruthless man.
Roeder cut Grant's players and replaced them with loans. While I'll admit, I thought it was a good idea at the time. Better players arriving without costly salaries and transfer fees. Brilliant right? Well if you are near the top or mid-table without any pressure and the freedom to play football, they are great. However, as we discovered during the run-in. The extra heart and fight required to battle out of trouble just wasn't there. Even on our last day, the drop looming, we rolled over.
Some of Roeder's loans worked -- Leroy Lita for instance -- but others just sucked salaries while failing to even appear on the bench. Troy-Archibald Henville from Spurs. OJ Koroma from Portsmouth. Henville went back to Spurs and played in their reserves while we were still paying him! Another expensive mistake was the aging and injury prone Antoine Sibierski. He spent more time on the treatment table than on the training pitch.
Glenn Roeder's attitude was appalling. He was rude and arrogant. In fact, he was such a dick that he managed to lose the dressing room. And once the players don't want to know, the clock is ticking. On top of that, he had absolutely no respect for the clubs life-blood. The supporters. Standing up at the clubs AGM he replied to criticism by replying "I must have missed your tenure as England manager".
Now the club was in deep sh*t. But for me, the mother of all absurd f@*k ups was to loan Jamie Cureton to Barnsley. Cureton is a confidence player. He had missed some absolute sitters early in the season and instead of putting his arm around the guy and treating him with a positive attitude, he publicly criticized the player and threw him under the bus. He wasn't the only one. Roeder never manned up and took responsibility. A trait you certainly won't find in current boss Bryan Gunn.
Cureton: Thrown under Roeder's bus, then loaned to relegation rivals Barnsley.
While on loan. Cureton's goals bagged our relegation rivals 4 vital points. As soon as Roeder was fired, Gunn recalled Cureton immediately. Cureton has not been on form this season and I'm not saying he was important to our campaign. But Roeder ruined him, destroyed his confidence and then sent him on loan to score goals for the team who stayed up on Sunday. Roeder also threw Wes Hoolahan under the bus and destroyed his confidence too, after the player jumped out of a tackle that led to a goal. He then dropped Hoolahan for weeks.
The bigger picture of Norwich City FC's recent history is one of a club that keeps its head above water and relies of unearthing gems, like Clingan and Cody McDonald to compete. The funds to run with the pack are just not there. Hope is derived from seeing the likes Cardiff, Burnley, Preston and Bristol City flirt with the top 6 and in remembering Worthingtons class of 2003-2004. However, the board have made some monumental mistakes that have not allowed them a comfortable existence, notably the appointments of Peter Grant and Glenn Roeder.
Currently they are receiving some serious flack for not having enough cash. That makes no sense to me. There is no-one out there willing to invest or replace Delia Smith. She herself has pumped millions into the club and freely admits that it is not enough in football today to achieve success, but the abuse she has received for not having deep enough pockets is simply not on. If someone has money and wants to buy the club then fair play, but that person doesn't exist and Smith cares a great deal about Norwich City.
Takeover broker Keith Harris has been trying to find investment for Norwich, along with a buyer for Everton for over a year now and no one is interested. Owning a football club these days is not an investment, its a money pit. An activity for the rich with the rewards of glory and adoration should they be successful. A quick look at Sunderland, Birmingham and Wolves shows clearly what can be achieved with cash.
I'm not saying someone should NOT be made to pay for the current mess at Carrow Road. They should, the board have taken plenty of bad advice from within. I could highlight some non-football related faux-pas, but I'll save those for another day. It will be interesting to see if Delia decides to bring an axe down away from the pitch over the next few days.
So what's next? Well, some our best players are bound to leave and others deserve to. We have some great kids coming through and we need to find a balance. But for me one thing is blatantly clear. We need stability and we need a manager who understands the place, the supporters and what's required at Norwich City football club. That means no more outsiders. No more changes. No more gambles on managers who roll into town clueless about our club, it's academy and it's amazing supporters. No more dramatic change on the agenda. That could set us back years and leave us a League One mainstay.
The Roeder era will stay with Norwich fans for a very long time and should act as a warning now, as the board discusses the future.
The club has enjoyed its most successful spells under managers who were promoted from within. Managers who understand what's needed without destroying the clubs chemistry with the fans, ruining the style of football we play and upsetting the squad to the point of having to start anew. Mike Walker was promoted from within as was Worthington. Walker was appointed after years of working with the youth academy. As a manger he was familiar with the(then) current players and the players coming through the ranks. Now more than ever, that is what we need. That is why we must stick with Bryan Gunn.
Walker (right). Took Norwich into Europe.
Gunny may be inexperienced as a manager but he has played 500 times for City and he wasn't sleeping throughout those games. All managers have to start somewhere. What Gunn does have, is a deep seated passion for Norwich City, a rapport with it's supporters going back more than 20 years and an understanding of what's needed. He has already shown in his short time in charge he can do the job. He signed Cody McDonald for a snip and brought Jason Shackell back along with defensive cover in the shape of Adrian Leijer. He was handed a shi*t sandwich and saw what needed doing.
Without a shadow of a doubt, without Shackell, we would have been relegated weeks ago. Roeder had no defensive cover and deemed it unimportant. Unearthing future McDonalds is going to be crucial in a league with little TV money and lower ticket prices. Gunn's loans to replace Roeder's, were also good signings. Alan Lee should be signed permanently and Gow and Mooney played a part in prolonging relegation to the last day.
Cody McDonald. One for the future.
Most importantly, Gunn knows the youth players, the next crop and that is going to be key for us next season. We will need to rely on the next batch of academy kids to provide depth to a side that must bounce back immediately to avoid financial trouble. Korey Smith, Michael Spillane, Declan Rudd and Luke Daley will all need to play a part next year as we build a team of players who want to be at Carrow Road and play like they do. Gunn's lack of managerial experience must be complemented by the best coaching available. Whether that is the current coaches, Ians Crook and Butterworth or someone else. The right balance will provide the support required to make the right decisions and bridge the experience gap.
Roy Keane was handed a sack of money at Sunderland and had no experience before Quinn and co hired him. Today folks are calling him an ambitious signing at Ipswich. Whats the difference? The money got Sunderland up, not Keane. I see Gunn as an ambitious man with the drive to be successful at Norwich.
No more changes. The club needs to appoint Gunn and build for the future with a 'Norwich' state of mind.
It's vitally important to keep Clingan. His League One experience and position at the heart of our midfield must be utilized and a team built around him. If we can keep one player it needs to be him. The 3 million we would receive from suitors like Fulham is nothing compared to his value to us now. Hoolahan would also be a player who would excel in League One, whether or not he fancies the drop and cares enough remains to be seen. After all, many players now have a clause allowing them to leave if their club is relegated. They sure know how to show loyalty right? And all of the moving about gives Mr ten percent another fee.
One thing is for sure. We now have a chance to put things right under Gunn. To fix 3 years of bad football and terrible decisions. To build a foundation and a team with a heart that beats in Norwich and not Newcastle or somewhere else. With home-grown players and players like Cody McDonald and Alan Lee, players grateful to play in the yellow and green and to fight for such a great club.
I just hope that this weeks board meetings inspire the right appointment and do not bring another mistake down the A11 with more change. That would be unforgivable.
-Bigus
Monday, April 27, 2009
Monday Open Thread: Relegation Nation
Adopt the squeaky bum position and join us for a tense afternoon in the EPL and Colaship.
Two games. Four teams. Three in deep doo-doo. One Highlander. Etc.
As you can see above, the lads at George Keeley's have graciously jerry-rigged some bootleg A/V with ESPN360 piped onto a TV. Bigus is currently there, wearing a hole in the floor with his frantic pacing up and down the bar as we await kick-off from Carrow Road.
So yeah, you can watch Norwich/Reading on a computer-destroying ESPN360 should you wish.
Oh, and something about Alan Shearer.
TODAY:
Newcastle v. Portsmouth
-----
The Bland Alans: Shay Given's Less Talented Replacement, Beye, Coloccini, Bassong, Jose Enrique, Smith, Nicky Butt, Hard-Workin' Duff, Aussie who should retire, Martins, Crocked Midget.
Subs: The Evil Krul!, Barton the Thuggish, Guthrie, Gutierrez, Peter "Peace" Lovenkrands, Edgar, Carroll.
Pompey: Butterfingers James, Glen Johnson, Solololol Campbell, Distin, Hreidarsson, Davis, Belhadj, Hughes, Mullins, The Nuuuug, Man Who Hopes to Have Nachos.
Subs: Begovic, Pennant, Pamarot, Utaka, Cranie, Kanu, Basinas.
With Mike Riley in charge, you can almost smell the botched penalty decision that swings the game dramatically to favour one side. Shearer has done nothing to lift the Magpies whatsoever, so I'm going with a dramatic, agonizing 1-1 draw.
Norwich v. Reading
-----
Canaries: Marshall, Otsemobor, Shackell, Doherty, Bertrand, Gow, Clingan, Russell, Carney, Lee, McDonald.
Subs: Nelson, Cureton, Lappin, Leijer, Daley
Hooped Spoilers: Hahnemann, Rosenior, Bikey, Duberry, Harding, Cisse, Karacan, Kebe, Little, Kitson, Long.
Subs: Federici, Matejovsky, Doyle, S Hunt, Pearce
No clue here. Narrow, fraught, desperate 1-0 home win via a late goal from a teenager. Or something like that.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Norwichomon: Saturday: Bigus.
[Ed. Note: reposted as we're actually gonna finish this thing shortly!]
Well we are back from an epic weekend. We took in 2 matches and drank enough bitter to float a battle ship in. In fact, its taken me until today to recover enough to write this. My body was so bloated by beautiful meat products such as chicken balti, steak and mushroom pies and scotch eggs, that I couldn't reach the keyboard with my arms until now. But never fear, I'm back in shape and ready to detail my trip to Norwich and day out at Wembley with Lingering Bursitis, Relegation Zone Mikey, Kopper, Lumberjack and his man-slave 'The Turk'.
My liver is out of the washing machine and my memory has returned. Lets go...
Saturday 28th Feb 2009
My day started rather differently than the rest of the boys. While they nursed hang-overs from an evening that Lingering will describe in detail in his blog, yours truly had a nice relaxing evening with my folks. Followed by the sleep of a thousand sleepy sleepers. Just what the doctor ordered ahead of a day in Norwich to be followed by a mammoth evening of fun. I headed to Norwich with my dad while the others had the pleasure of being driven from London in a coach that Lumberjack had hired. What transpired on THAT journey nearly lead Kopper's brain to explode, but again, that's one for Lingering to tell as I heard it second hand.
I checked into the hotel at the greatest ground on earth at noon. The Holiday Inn Carrow road is situated between the Barclay stand and the Jarrold. It offers some lucky buggers a view of the glorious pitch as they awake from their slumbers. Not me however. My morning view was the tire shop across the street. Anyway, I digress. The lads were late, but I was already in the bar with a pint in hand by noon.
But while the boys and their 'genius' of a driver wound their way down narrow c roads to Norwich I was having pre-game beers with Ex Norwich midfielder Mike Milligan and my mate (Norwich Academy coach) John Revell.
The lads arrived and after they had bitched about the driver, we all made our way to the Gunn club whicj is housed in the Barclay stand. After a couple of beers, the NY Canary members of the crew (myself and Kopper) were asked questions (in front of the Gunn clubs audience) by Norwich legend Jeremy Goss. Kopper was asked how a yank could become a Norwich fan and I explained how the NY Canaries came to be.
Kopper and Jeremy Goss.
The mention of the great Gossy gives me the perfect excuse to share this....
and...
Get in Gossy! Now those are two truly super strikes!
After our turn on the mic, the queen of Carrow Road herself came to find us. For those of you who have never heard of Delia Smith, I will briefly explain. Delia is England's Martha Stewart but just for cooking. Best selling books and TV shows have made her a household name. A lifelong City fan, Delia and her Husband are majority shareholders of Norwich City.
Kopper tells Delia where she can get a good steak in NYC.
To say I was excited to meet the great lady is an understatement. Kopper and I presented her with an NY Canaries t-shirt, and Kopper suggested some restaurants she might enjoy in New York. Glad he spoke up, I'd probably send her to hooters.
Now those of you who DO remember Delia and read this site will no doubt remember a certain incident that was played to death by the media. A certain incident from a certain Premiership game and a half-time plea for noise. I won't be sharing that video. But for those in the dark, this was a sketch by soccer am I found amusing, based on 'that' incident. If you cant laugh at yerself then theres no hope I say!
Right, back to business, where were we? Ahh the game itself. Hmmm, well, after meeting Delia AND Captain Canary (see below). Norwich took to the field in a crucial home game with Coventry. Not a great game at all, as like much of this season we failed to take the chances we created. Jordan Hendersen gave Coventry the lead on 19 minutes when he arrived at the far stick to hit home a cross from former Norwich player David Bell. Carrow Road was nervy and quiet. I've never known it to be so well, morbid in atmosphere. Rattling chains would not have sounded out of place. It was as if we have already accepted relegation. The half-time pie hit the spot but I wasn't happy. 3,500 miles to watch Carl Cort 'not bother' to try to win headers was depressing.
Kopper with Captain Canary. That's Kopper on the right if you were wondering.
A first half corner comes to nothing.
The second half started much better. Otsemobor created a chance for Cureton, but the luckless striker missed a sitter with the goal gaping from 6 yards (and has since been dropped). Cureton is a confidence player, when he is on form he is great but when he stinks? Well, boy does he stink. The effort is always there with him but he misses open goals and simple tap ins.
The good spell continued and following a corner and a scramble in the box, Grounds hit the ball through a crowd of players and equalized on 53 mins. Carrow Road errupted and finally the crowd perked up. Soon after Norwich were denied a blatant penalty when Corts marker jumped with him and handled the ball as it looked set to arrive at the big mans head. Cort was much better in the second half, his movement was good and he challenged for the ball. One can only think that Bryan Gunn had a word in his ear over a half-time cup of tea.
On 71 minutes the game was decided and we were all dealt a kick in the nuts as we watched a super player score a super goal. But not for us. Daniel Fox turned Carl Cort 3 times from just inside the box on the right and then picked his spot with a left footed shot into the top corner. It was frustrating to see no one move to help Cort as Fox took his sweet time. What was even more frustrating was to see our captain Mark Fotheringham slowly walk back to the box casual as can be, watching this event unfold 6 yards away in front of him. With effort like that we don't stand a chance of staying up. Fotheringham was replaced soon after and stormed off down the tunnel. He hasn't played since. Nor will he again I hope! Russell and Pattison are far more committed and better players in my opinion. Fotheringham has never really wanted to be here and only signed a one year deal. Which screams of the desire needed to be made captain right? Glenn Roeder thought so. Fotheringham also talks a great game in the press. Always the first to scream a war cry in papers and the last to close someone down.
Fotheringham. Talks a good game.
Chris Coleman's Coventry looked very balanced and he is building a nice team there. Daniel Fox is superb and 19 year old Aron Gunnarsson didnt stop running all day. He is a star of the future for sure. He looked like he was going to create a chance everytime he touched the ball.
After 4 mins of stopage time the final whistle blew. The boos echoed around the ground and we all sulked, shrugged, shook heads on the way back to the Gunn club. I didnt see enough commitment and desire to stay up to be honest. Since our trip City won at QPR but lost on Saturday in a crucial 6 pointer to Blackpool.
Staying up will be a mammoth task now. But one that is only achieveable with wholesale changes to the starting line up. We have nothing to lose at this point. Our relegation rivals have hit form and some of our players look as if they have thrown in the towel. I would like to see Cody McDonald, David Carney and maybe a couple of the youth kids get a run out. Players who will be here next season and have something to fight for.
-----------------------------------------------
STOP THE BLOG EQUIVALENT TO THE PRINTING PRESS!
I scribbled that last paragraph YESTERDAY. The glass was half empty. But today? The glass is half full. Last night Norwich beat Cardiff 2-0! Cue the woo girls and the marching band. Cue the flag waving midgets. Cue the clinking of beer glasses throughout the canary kingdom. We are Alive....ALIVE.
Not only did we win but results have gone our way elsewhere in the contradictory Colaship. We now face our biggest game in 50 years this weekend as Plymouth (4 points ahead) visit Carrow Road for what could be the mother of all Norwich victories? I will pray every day from now until Saturday.
I will also evoke the magical powers of the 1973 canaries! It worked yesterday. No really! I had to leave the office and my trusty BBC Norfolk audio feed just before half-time. Armed with instant messaging buddies and the humble refresh feature on my blackberry browser, I finished the game in a frenzy of communication.
On the train I decided that maybe listening to the Wembley 73 song "The Canaries" may help me 'will' a victory. It was working, we scored. 5 times in a row, the trumpets of the cheesy football number played as I was glued to the bbc results page. Shoot, the results started to go against us. But wait..The song had stopped again and I had forgotten to start it up. Back on it went, along with the repeat button. The results started to go our way. The instant messages brought news of Derby equalizers and a goal from former Norwich loanee Martin Taylor. A Swansea winner. And then it happened...We scored again! I have vowed that this weekend, that song will be be playing continuessley as we take on Plymouth. Want to hear the magical number? Of course you do...
It's the song what done it!
Of course, the result it had nothing to do with outstanding debut perfomances from McDonald, Mooney and a blinder from Alan Gow! Incidentily, Mcdonald was working as a scaffolder on the London Underground just a few weeks ago. Gunn had decided to freshen things up with some new faces, hungry players. Players who hadn't quit yet. Mooney had never played at this level either. Both Mooney and McDonald took their goals like they had been playing at Championship level for years. No fear, just confidence. Get In!
--------------------------------------------------
I will now return you to a Saturday in Norwich.
Back in the Gunn club, man of the match Gary Doherty looked like a rabbit in the headlights as he had to answer some tough questions about City's performance and spend 30 mins shaking hands and smiling for pictures when I am sure he would have rather been banging his head against a wall somewhere else. Like a dissapointed child I asked him to keep us up, as if the man known as 'Ginger Pele' holds the keys to survival.
The lads with Gary Doherty, John Revell and Dick Mills.
After a few more beers and some tears in those beers, I had a chat with former manager Dave Stringer to see what he thought of the game and of the current situation at Carrow Road. After that I really needed a drink! It was back to the hotel for a quick change of clothes and then out for a curry.
The day and evening was all set up by my mate John Revell. The Rev is a top bloke, Norwich academy coach and a real character. He parties with the best of them and has no idea of his age, except for that he thinks he is 21. Now that's the way to be! Top man. Talking of being 21. John Jr WAS 21 on this very day. He is the tall lad on the left in the black shirt. Oh to be 21 again....
The Rev, his boys and their mates.
There were 40 of us at Spiceland in Norwich for a ruby, and I thought this was the ideal time to settle a little bit of UF business. A while back Lingering had made (and lost) a bet with The Fans Attic. Now, if you read this site a lot (or a little) you will know that Lingering Bursitis has a deep, deep hatred for David Beckham. It's completely unnatural and unexplainable. Ask "what did David do to you Lingering?" and he will reply "he lives". Bizzare and weird I know. I mean...Who could possibly hate David Beckham? It's like hating small kittens or Bruce Forsythe. Just weird. Anyway, the bet was lost and the punishment must be issued! Lingering would have to wear a Beckham shirt in a public place causing a damaging amount of embarrassment to his self esteem and his anti-Beckham rhetoric.
Well, little did Lingering know but a Beckham shirt was with me and Saturday night in Norwich, in frint of a full restaurant was the night. After a brief explanation and a round of applause, out it popped. BBC commentator, ex-Norwich player and top bloke Neil Adams presented the shirt to Lingering as he turned the color of a his favorite Liverpool Jersey. After the horror of the moment subsided, he bowed his head, slipped it on and took his medicine. Fair play to the lad, it stayed on all through dinner.
Lingering B stands at the top of the table as everyone has a good giggle at his distressed mug.
LB starts to lighten up and see the funny side.
As dinner came to a close, Neil Adam's cell phone rang, except it wasn't for him. He passed me the phone to me and said "it's Gunny for you". Gunny for me? I said? Wowzer...I'd met Gunny on a few occassions but thats one bloke who meets more people a week than the toilets at Penn station, surely he didn't remember?
He did you know, what a fantastic surprise. Bryan Gunn had called to acknowledge that we had flown 3500 miles to see us lose and to have a quick chat. He told me he was doing the best he could to keep us up and they were all working very hard to do so. How about that? This wouldn't happen at any other football club. I don't remember hearing about Rafa calling Lingering, or Relegation Zone Mikey getting a ring from 'Arry after the Cup final. Wonder if Precious Roy ever got a call from Wenger? " Hallo Roy, if youz writez one more ting about Eboue, ve are done!
Norwich Manager Bryan Gunn: I added the phone headset for this realistic 'Crimewatch' style reconstruction of the phone call.
This kind of effort is what sets Norwich City football club and it's people well above any other club. Bryan Gunn had bothered to make my night after a dissapointing result when I am sure he had plenty on his mind and better things to do. Top man.
Well. After the Curry we all hit the local night spots for beer, shots, lots of chat and more shots. And If you think I'm telling you all about that you can think again!
'Norwichomon' part two will be all about the Carling Cup final. Watch out for that shortly.
-Bigus.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Norwichomon by Bigus: Part 1.
This post is part one of four. Two for the Saturday of our trip and two for the Sunday, from TWO perspectives. Did Lingering Bursitis and I see the same games, have the same fun?
Well we are back from an epic weekend. We took in 2 matches and drank enough bitter to float a battle ship in. In fact, its taken me until today to recover enough to write this. My body was so bloated by beautiful meat products such as chicken balti, steak and mushroom pies and scotch eggs, that I couldn't reach the keyboard with my arms until now. But never fear, I'm back in shape and ready to detail my trip to Norwich and day out at Wembley with Lingering Bursitis, Relegation Zone Mikey, Kopper, Lumberjack and his man-slave 'The Turk'.
My liver is out of the washing machine and my memory has returned. Lets go...
Saturday 28th Feb 2009
My day started rather differently than the rest of the boys. While they nursed hang-overs from an evening that Lingering will describe in detail in his blog, yours truly had a nice relaxing evening with my folks. Followed by the sleep of a thousand sleepy sleepers. Just what the doctor ordered ahead of a day in Norwich to be followed by a bumper evening of fun. I headed to Norwich with my dad while the others had the pleasure of being driven from London in a coach that Lumberjack had hired. What transpired on THAT journey nearly lead Kopper's brain to explode, but again, that's one for Lingering to tell as I heard it second hand.
I checked into the hotel at the greatest ground on earth at noon. The Holiday Inn Carrow Road is situated between the Barclay stand and the Jarrold. It offers some lucky buggers a view of the glorious pitch as they awake from their slumbers. Not me however. My morning view was the tire shop across the street. Anyway, I digress. The lads were late, but I was already in the bar with a pint in hand.
But while the boys and their 'genius' of a driver wound their way down narrow c roads to Norwich from Ip..Ip..Ip..That place, I was having pre-game beers with Ex Norwich midfielder Mike Milligan and my mate (Norwich Academy coach) John Revell.
The lads finally arrived and after they had bitched about their driver, we all made our way to the Gunn club, which is housed in the Barclay stand. After a couple of beers, the NY Canary members of the crew (myself and Kopper) were asked questions (in front of the Gunn clubs audience) by Norwich legend Jeremy Goss. Kopper was asked how a yank could become a Norwich fan and I explained how the NY Canaries came to be. I'm sure we ruined lunch for many folks and for that I appologize now.
Kopper and Jeremy Goss.
The mention of the great Gossy gives me the perfect excuse to share this....
and...
Get in Gossy! Now those are two, truly super strikes!
After our turn on the mic, the queen of Carrow Road herself came to find us. For those of you who have never heard of Delia Smith, I will briefly explain. Delia is England's Martha Stewart but just for cooking. Best selling books and TV shows have made her a household name. A lifelong City fan, Delia and her husband are majority shareholders of Norwich City.
Kopper tells Delia where she can get a good steak in NYC.
To say I was excited to meet the great lady is an understatement. Kopper and I presented her with an NY Canaries t-shirt, and Kopper suggested some restaurants she might enjoy in New York. Glad he spoke up, I'd probably have sent her to Hooters.
Now those of you who DO remember Delia and read this site will no doubt remember a certain incident that was played to death by the media. A certain incident from a certain Premiership game and a half-time plea for noise. I won't be sharing that video. But for those in the dark, this was a sketch that aired on soccer am that I found amusing, based on 'that' incident.
"Canary, canary, canary". Hilarious.
Right, back to business, where were we? Ahh the game itself. Hmmm, well, after meeting Delia AND Captain Canary (see below). Norwich took to the field in a crucial home game with Coventry. Not a great game at all, as like much of this season we failed to take the chances we created. Jordan Hendersen gave Coventry the lead on 19 minutes when he arrived at the far stick to hit home a cross from former Norwich player David Bell. Carrow Road was nervy and quiet. I've never known it to be so, well, morbid in atmosphere. Rattling chains would not have sounded 'out of place'. It was as if we have already accepted relegation. The half-time pie hit the spot but I wasn't happy. 3,500 miles to watch Carl Cort 'not bother' to try to win headers was depressing.
Kopper with Captain Canary. That's Kopper on the right if you were wondering.
A first half corner comes to nothing.
The second half started much better. Otsemobor created a chance for Cureton, but the luckless striker missed a sitter with the goal gaping from 6 yards (and has since been dropped). Cureton is a confidence player, when he is on form he is great but when he stinks? Well, boy does he stink. The effort is always there with him but he misses open goals and simple tap ins.
The good spell continued and following a corner and a scramble in the box, Grounds hit the ball through a crowd of players and equalized on 53 mins. Carrow Road erupted and finally the crowd perked up. Soon after Norwich were denied a blatant penalty when Cort's marker jumped with him and handled the ball as it looked set to arrive at the big mans head. Cort was much better in the second half, his movement was good and he challenged for the ball. One can only think that Bryan Gunn had a word in his ear over a half-time cup of tea.
On 71 minutes the game was decided and we were all dealt a kick in the nuts as we watched a super player score a super goal. But not for us. Daniel Fox turned Carl Cort 3 times from just inside the box on the right and then picked his spot with a left footed shot into the top corner. It was frustrating to see no one move to help Cort as Fox took his sweet time. What was even more frustrating was to see our captain Mark Fotheringham slowly walk back to the box casual as can be, watching this event unfold 6 yards away in front of him. With effort like that we don't stand a chance of staying up. Fotheringham was replaced soon after and stormed off down the tunnel. He hasn't played since. Nor will he again I hope! Russell and Pattison are far more committed and better players in my opinion. Fotheringham has never really wanted to be here and only signed a one year deal, which screams of the desire needed to be made captain right? Glenn Roeder thought so. Fotheringham also talks a great game in the press. Always the first to scream a war cry in papers and the last to close someone down.
Fotheringham. Talks a good game.
Chris Coleman's Coventry looked very balanced and he is building a nice team there. Daniel Fox is superb and 19 year old Aron Gunnarsson didn't stop running all day. He is a star of the future for sure. He looked like he was going to create a chance every time he touched the ball.
After 4 mins of stoppage time the final whistle blew. The boos echoed around the ground and we all sulked, shrugged, shook heads on the way back to the Gunn club. I didn't see enough commitment and desire to stay up to be honest. Since our trip, City won at QPR but lost on Saturday in a crucial 6 pointer to Blackpool.
Staying up will be a mammoth task now. But one that is only achievable with wholesale changes to the starting line up. We have nothing to lose at this point. Our relegation rivals have hit form and some of our players look as if they have thrown in the towel. I would like to see Cody McDonald, David Carney and maybe a couple of the youth kids get a run out. Players who will be here next season and have something to fight for.
-----------------------------------------------
STOP THE BLOG EQUIVALENT TO THE PRINTING PRESS! (buzzer)
I scribbled that last paragraph YESTERDAY. The glass was half empty. But today? The glass is half full. Last night Norwich beat Cardiff 2-0! Cue the woo girls and the marching band. Cue the flag waving midgets. Cue the clinking of beer glasses throughout the canary kingdom. We are Alive....ALIVE I say.
Not only did we win but results have gone our way elsewhere in the contadiction that is the current Colaship. We now face what could be our biggest game in 50 years this weekend as Plymouth (4 points ahead) visit Carrow Road. I will pray every day from now until Saturday. Oh please lord, I will believe if you just let us win this one game. Ever said that as a kid?
I will also invoke the magical powers of the 1973 canaries! It worked yesterday. No really! I had to leave the office and my trusty BBC Norfolk audio feed just before half-time. Armed with a platoon of instant messaging buddies and the humble refresh feature on my blackberry browser, I finished the game in a frenzy of communication.
On the train I decided that maybe listening to the Wembley 73 song "The Canaries" may help me 'will' a victory. It was working, we scored. 5 times in a row the song played, the trumpets of the cheesy football number blasting in my ears as I stared, glued to the BBC results page. Shoot, the results started to go against us. But wait..The song had stopped again and I had forgotten to start it up. Back on it went, along with the repeat feature. The results started to go our way. The instant messages brought news of Derby equalizers and a goal from former Norwich loanee Martin Taylor at Barnsley. A Swansea winner. And then it happened...We scored again!
I have vowed that this weekend, that song will be be playing continuously as we take on Plymouth. Want to hear the magical number? The song that holds the power of survival and victory? You know you do...
It's the song what done it.
Of course, the result had nothing to do with outstanding debut performances from McDonald, Mooney and a blinder from Alan Gow! Incidentally, McDonald was working as a scaffolder on the London Underground just a few weeks ago. Gunn had decided to freshen things up with some new faces, hungry players. Players who hadn't quit yet. Like Cody McDonald, Mooney had never played at this level either. Both Mooney and McDonald took their goals like they had been playing at Championship level for years. No fear, just confidence. Get In!
--------------------------------------------------
I will now return you to a Saturday in Norwich.
Back in the Gunn club, man of the match Gary Doherty looked like a rabbit in the headlights as he had to answer some tough questions about City's performance and spend 30 mins shaking hands and smiling for pictures when I am sure he would have rather been banging his head against a wall somewhere else. Like a disappointed child I asked him to keep us up, as if the man known as 'Ginger Pele' holds the keys to 21st place.
The lads with Gary Doherty, John Revell and Dick Mills.
After a few more beers and some tears in those beers, I had a chat with former manager Dave Stringer to see what he thought of the game and of the current situation at Carrow Road. After that I really needed a drink! It was back to the hotel for a quick change of clothes and then out for a curry.
The day and evening was arranged by my mate John Revell. The Rev is a top bloke, Norwich academy coach and a real character. He parties with the best of them and has no idea of his age, except for that he thinks he is about 21. Now that's the way to be! Top man. Talking of being 21. John Jr WAS 21 on this very day. He is the tall lad on the left in the black shirt. Oh to be 21 again....
The Rev, his boys and their mates.
There were 40 of us at Spice land in Norwich for a ruby, and I thought this was the ideal time to settle a little bit of UF business. A while back Lingering had made (and lost) a bet with 'The Fans Attic'. Now, if you read this site a lot (or a little) you will know that Lingering Bursitis has a deep, deep hatred for David Beckham. It's completely unnatural and unexplainable. Ask "What did David do to you Lingering?" and he will reply "he lives". Bizarre and weird I know. I mean...Who could possibly hate David Beckham? It's like harbouring a dislike for small kittens or Bruce Forsythe. Just weird. Anyway, the bet was lost and the punishment must be issued! Lingering would have to wear a Beckham shirt in a public place causing a damaging amount of embarrassment and a hefty blow to his self esteem and his anti-Beckham rhetoric.
Well, little did Lingering know, but a Beckham shirt was with me and Saturday night in Norwich, in front of a full restaurant was the perfect time. After a brief explanation and a round of applause, out it popped. BBC commentator, ex-Norwich player and top bloke Neil Adams presented the shirt to Lingering as he turned the color of a his favorite Liverpool Jersey. After the horror of the moment subsided, he bowed his head, slipped it on and took his medicine. Fair play to the lad, it stayed on all through dinner.
Lingering B stands at the top of the table as everyone has a good giggle at his distressed mug.
LB starts to lighten up and see the funny side.
As dinner came to a close, Neil Adam's cell phone rang, except it wasn't for him. He passed the phone to me and said "it's Gunny for you". Gunny for me? I said? Wowzer...I'd met Gunny on a few occasions but that's one bloke who meets more people a week than the toilets at Penn station, surely he didn't remember?
He did you know, what a fantastic surprise. Bryan Gunn had called to acknowledge that we had flown 3500 miles to see us lose and to have a quick chat. He told me he was doing the best he could to keep us up and they were all working very hard to do so. How about that? This wouldn't happen at any other football club. I don't remember hearing about Rafa calling Lingering, or Relegation Zone Mikey getting a ring from 'Arry after the Cup final. Wonder if Precious Roy ever got a call from Wenger?
"Hallo Roy, if youz writez one more ting about Eboue, yooo ant me are done!"
Norwich Manager Bryan Gunn: I added the phone headset for this realistic 'Crime watch' style reconstruction of the phone call.
This kind of effort is what sets Norwich City football club and it's people well above any other club. Bryan Gunn had bothered to make my night after a disappointing result when I am sure he had plenty on his mind and better things to do. Top man.
Well. After the Curry we all hit the local night spots for beer, shots, lots of chat and more shots. And If you think I'm telling you all about that you can think again!
'Norwichomon' part two will be Lingering B's account of the day in Norwich and parts 3 and 4 will be all about the Carling Cup final. Watch out for those shortly.
-Bigus.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Introducing... Norwichomon
We've not mentioned it on the site yet, but Bigus and I, along with Relegation Zone Mikey (the hapless Yiddo referenced from time to time in Hirshey's old DS column) and a couple of others, are heading to England tonight for a spot of live footy.
The cumulative effect of weeks and months of desperate searching for pirated feeds has finally broken us down, and it's high time for a little trip.
And what better weekend than this one in front of us?
We won't be blogging live or anything, as that would be insane; however, we'll be putting together some reports from the road, undoubtedly having two very different impressions of the same events.
And so, Norwichomon was born, the chance for us to report on his beloved Colaship team, as well as the spectacle of New Wembley, the lop-sided nature of the fixture on paper, and the wonderful bureaucracy known as the FA in action.
Our schedule is light, but deadly:
- Norwich City v. Coventry City on Saturday, in what promises to be a must-win for those relegation-threatened Canaries
- Man United v. Spurs in the Carling Cup Final on Sunday.
We'll try and grab a few pictures along the way, including some from a scheduled night out with some of the Norwich players and coaches. We can't promise much, but you can bet I'll be trying to pull a Gerrard and get some DJ knocked out should he not play any Phil Collins.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Up The City! I’m Begging You…
This week, my good mate, Bigus Dickus’ Norwich City Canaries head to Preston North End for yet another critical match in their drive to again survive to fight another year in the Football League Championship.
After Chelsea, there is no football club on the planet that I follow more closely. There is no football club who’s week-to-week fortunes affect my very happiness. Norwich’s relegation scraps have me on the edge of my seat.
Why do I care deeply about some two-bit Anglian club run by a drunk fry-cook and her incompetent boardmates? Because they are my Tortured Friend’s Team. Find out what this means after the jump…
Bigus is my good mate. We’ve shared many a fantastic evening. We wind each other up into a (mostly) friendly rage most every week talking football. And if you are a mate of Bigus’, Norwich City is in your life.
Norwich City are my cross to bear because they are Bigus’ cross to bear. Much like my wife has had to suffer the slings and arrows of being married to a Buffalo Bills fan – the foul moods, the exultation-followed-by-inevitable-heartbreak – I suffer with Norwich because I can’t stand the thought of watching my good mate’s team drop to (shudder) League One. The lad would be devastated. I can’t bear the thought of watching him endure such a thing.
So every week, like a Stockholm-Syndrome victim, I follow the ins and outs of Carrow Road. I check the table. I follow the transfer rumours. I try to figure out how in hell a club in Norwich’s position could possibly hire an utterly inexperienced manager at such a critical time. I do the points math. I try to figure out how many points Watford’s two matches in hand are worth.
I do this because Norwich are in my life as surely as they are in Bigus’ life. Last Spring, there were a group of us dying every Saturday as Norwich stumbled to safety. There were weeks when a critical Chelsea victory somehow mattered less to my state of mind than a Norwich away draw.
Now, you might think that I would hate Norwich for this. Hate them like I hate the demons that have ruined other friends’ lives. Demons like alcohol, depression or cancer. But I worship Demon Chelsea. I have a Blue fever to Bigus’ Yellow. I can’t help but sweat every result in the Canary saga.
England, too. Do you remember watching England with your English mates the last, say, 20 major international tournaments? Have you bought an England shirt in fellowship? Does the thought of PKs haunt your dreams?
Or do you have a Tottenham supporter friend? If so, nothing more need be said.
Who is your Tortured Friend’s Team?
How have you debased yourself cheering them on for your friend?
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