Turkey: Now 100% Gay-Free

Halil İbrahim Dinçdağ was forced to quit his job as a soccer ref in Turkey after he turned up gay.

And that took care of the last gay person in Turkey.

Dinçdağ actually lost his job because he couldn't complete his compulsory military service. But according to regulations in Turkey, anyone failing to complete their military service for health reasons is unfit to perform as a referee.

The 33-year-old was excused from military service after he was listed as gay on his medical report. To which the only rational response is: Being gay is a medical condition in Turkey?

Anyway, Dinçdağ came out and appeared on national TV as the new co-host of Turkish Project Runway.

Oh c'mon. What good are stereotypes if we can't use them for easy jokes?

Dinçdağ was actually far more serious and made a reasoned plea: "Please stand tall against the unfairness against you, whenever something wrong is happening," he said. "Say that it is wrong. Say what is right for you."

Not exactly MLK stuff, but UF supports you as you fight the good fight, Dinçdağ. Just so long as you look fabulous doing it.

Read more on "Turkey: Now 100% Gay-Free"...

Barca Is Super, Thanks for Asking

Well F.C. Barca might be in a bit of a slide on the pitch as the race for La Liga tightens, but a certain group of supporters thinks that the Blaugrana still look fabulous.

The first gay and lesbian football supporters' group to be officially accepted by a Spanish club has pinned its shield to the wall of Barcelona's stadium and vowed to fight prejudice in one of the world's most homophobic sports.

To celebrate, the fans then pinned each other. Hey-O!

Anyway, Barcelona has gay supporters. They're official. And they're pissed.

Continues the Guardian: "When England's football players took on Spain in Seville a fortnight ago, journalists were watching home fans so hard for racist abuse that they failed to notice how Beckham was subjected to a barrage of homophobic insults. 'They spent more than a minute chanting "Beckham maricón" ("Beckham faggot"), said the peña's spokesman, Josep Ribes. 'We lodged a complaint about that.'"

Ooh, I bet that complaint was strongly worded, but on just the loveliest stationery you've ever seen.

Anyway, if you check the video above, Ribes is right. You can clearly hear the chant, and it's far more musical that any of us would have thought.

We're pretty tolerant around these parts. If two guys want to do each other up the pooper, God love them for it. We're also a little surprised because we'd think that mere homophobia is a step in the right direction from abject racism. It's almost as if Spain is maturing before our ears.

Also, why the hell are Barca supporters, even gay ones, upset about this? A) You're Spanish. Becks is English. That's your opponent, you're supposed to hurl insults at him. B) You're a Barca fan. Becks played for Real Madrid, your rival, you're supposed to hurl insults at him. Finally, "Beckham, tus zapatos son feos" doesn't have the same catchy simplicity as "Beckham maricón."

Spain already has some of the most progressive same-sex marriage laws in Europe (or the world or that matter), not that that makes up for a stadium-wide chant, but on balance, they gays in Spain are probably already ahead in the game. Oh, and Becks is kind of gay. So there's that too.

Read more on "Barca Is Super, Thanks for Asking"...

Liveblogging the Opening Ceremonies

I don't want to step on any toes, but seriously, shouldn't there be soccer on my TV. It says it's 10:30!



By "step on any toes" I mean I know we've got someone on deck to liveblog the game. I'm live blogging this waster of time.

A bunch of Mumeschantz (sp?) type things have run out on to the field and formed a heart. They've got TV-like boxes for heads. This should be fun.

Now I think I see something that's supposed to be a sail.

Fucking A... Weenies Euro tech music. Is Nic Harcourt the music curator for this?

Now we have cows. Let me guess we're also getting clocks, chocolate, and ski heroes.

Put Julie Foudy back on my TV. Even she is better than this.

Okay, I didn't mean that.

Those women representing winter would be much better if they were topless. Just saying.

Anyway, apparently they have gays in Switzerland, too. This pretty much confirms it.

Holy shit, I was kidding on the skiers, but sure enough. Thanks Switzerland for living up to your stereotypes. I'm waiting for either Richard Simmons or Harvey Firestein to appear.

Longest. 13 Minutes. Ever.

I totally expect to see a headshot someday in L.A. and on the back someone is going to list having been a box in the Euro 08 Opening Ceremonies in their credits.

And now the clocks... all we need is the chocolate and I've hit the trifecta. Who needs the fucking Belmont. I am Kreskin.

Okay, I kind of like the countdown with the bodies rolling from white to red. I am beginning to question my sexuality.

By my count there are 8 minutes left. Fuck. Really? Only five minutes of this are gone?

Holy shit, I am totally rubbing one out later to the thought of Miss Switzerland. Haht. Almost makes up for the rest of this time waste.

Now the box heads are making the Euro logo. Not bad. Just don't bring out the gay mascots. This has already reached its quota of queer.

Well the sliver lining for the Swiss is this delays how long until Senderos makes an horrific defending error that leads to a goal.

Okay, my clock was wrong. That was only 3 minutes. Oof. Still, that was gratuitous.

Anyway, there is a match starting. Fucking A, I am pumped. Fucking B, I am going to miss the second match of the day so this one better totally fucking kick ass to make up for it.

Enjoy your watching, kids because after these three weeks are up, we've got a little over a full month before there is any meaningful futbol again.

Read more on "Liveblogging the Opening Ceremonies"...